Welcome to London the year is a 1605 and we are in the cellars of the Palace of Westminster.
Welcome to London the year is a 1605 and we are in the cellars of the Palace of Westminster.

Above us in a few moments time, King James of England and Scotland and his son,
Above us in a few moments time, King James of England and Scotland and his son,

Prince of Wales will arrive to open the latest session of Parliament. In the cellars down
Prince of Wales will arrive to open the latest session of Parliament. In the cellars down

here we are surrounded by three quarters of a ton of prime English gunpowder.
here we are surrounded by three quarters of a ton of prime English gunpowder.

In a few moments when they are settled upstairs I Guy Fawkes, will take this torch to that
In a few moments when they are settled upstairs I Guy Fawkes, will take this torch to that

gunpowder and send them all to a very noisy end and you my co-collaborators must run!
gunpowder and send them all to a very noisy end and you my co-collaborators must run!

I don�t know why we are whispering, they know we�re here. We didn�t sneak in under
I don�t know why we are whispering, they know we�re here. We didn�t sneak in under

the cover of darkness, we had rented it from them. Well, the original plan was to rent
the cover of darkness, we had rented it from them. Well, the original plan was to rent

a house from across the street and then tunnel under but the tunnel gate kept getting flooded.
a house from across the street and then tunnel under but the tunnel gate kept getting flooded.

So we asked an estate agent and he found us this place and got it under a six months contract
So we asked an estate agent and he found us this place and got it under a six months contract

which is perfect because as it happened, the King closed Parliament over the summer so
which is perfect because as it happened, the King closed Parliament over the summer so

that he could go hunting. Well, it�s the plague you see, it�s very bad in the summer
that he could go hunting. Well, it�s the plague you see, it�s very bad in the summer

months so you can�t really blame him. I don�t suppose we will get our deposit back
months so you can�t really blame him. I don�t suppose we will get our deposit back

though. So let me tell you why we are in the cellars
though. So let me tell you why we are in the cellars

of the Palace of Westminster ready to blow up the king and his government.
of the Palace of Westminster ready to blow up the king and his government.

It was 70 years ago and King Henry VIII wanted to marry Ann Boleyn but the Pope wouldn�t
It was 70 years ago and King Henry VIII wanted to marry Ann Boleyn but the Pope wouldn�t

let him. So King Henry VIII threw the Catholics out of the country, closed down their monasteries
let him. So King Henry VIII threw the Catholics out of the country, closed down their monasteries

and started his own church, the Church of England and ever since, the Pope has been
and started his own church, the Church of England and ever since, the Pope has been

looking to get back his power in the country. Well, 70 years have passed and things aren�t
looking to get back his power in the country. Well, 70 years have passed and things aren�t

going so well for the Catholics. Queen Elizabeth the first, King Henry VIII�s
going so well for the Catholics. Queen Elizabeth the first, King Henry VIII�s

daughter kept them at bay for 50 years and beat the Spanish at war; bowls, sailing, football.
daughter kept them at bay for 50 years and beat the Spanish at war; bowls, sailing, football.

And now, King James of Scotland and England has come to power and it�s even worse! He�s
And now, King James of Scotland and England has come to power and it�s even worse! He�s

even promised to rewrite the Bible in English and call it the King James Bible! Presumably
even promised to rewrite the Bible in English and call it the King James Bible! Presumably

so he can put it into hotel rooms, I don�t know. Anyways, this is the last straw.
so he can put it into hotel rooms, I don�t know. Anyways, this is the last straw.

So a group of us Catholics get together at the Drake and Duck to plot a Catholic rebellion.
So a group of us Catholics get together at the Drake and Duck to plot a Catholic rebellion.

At the meeting there was me; Robert Catesby, Thomas Winter, Kit Wright and Thomas Percy
At the meeting there was me; Robert Catesby, Thomas Winter, Kit Wright and Thomas Percy

and after a few drinks somebody suggested killing the King and replacing him with a
and after a few drinks somebody suggested killing the King and replacing him with a

Catholic. Cheers! After a few more drinks, somebody else suggested
Catholic. Cheers! After a few more drinks, somebody else suggested

filling a boat full of gunpowder, running it down the tent, pushing it under the Palace
filling a boat full of gunpowder, running it down the tent, pushing it under the Palace

and running away. Cheers! And to be honest, it did not get more technical
and running away. Cheers! And to be honest, it did not get more technical

than that. Yes we had trouble with the tunnel and then the gunpowder went off. Not off boom
than that. Yes we had trouble with the tunnel and then the gunpowder went off. Not off boom

but off pooh; since the Spanish war ended and they stopped killing people with it, the
but off pooh; since the Spanish war ended and they stopped killing people with it, the

quality control has gone right downhill. It really is not a lot more than horse manure
quality control has gone right downhill. It really is not a lot more than horse manure

and charcoal Anyways we might as well get on with it. Caught
and charcoal Anyways we might as well get on with it. Caught

red-handed! But how did they know we were here? How did our cunning plans fail?
red-handed! But how did they know we were here? How did our cunning plans fail?

Well, I have my own suspicions. Cast your mind back 18 months to our first
Well, I have my own suspicions. Cast your mind back 18 months to our first

meeting at the Drake and Duck. It�s a lovely pub but surely a pub strand is somewhere where
meeting at the Drake and Duck. It�s a lovely pub but surely a pub strand is somewhere where

you organize a football match or a trip to the theater or a stag night; it�s not the
you organize a football match or a trip to the theater or a stag night; it�s not the

place to plan regicide. And what about the estate agent? Surely the
place to plan regicide. And what about the estate agent? Surely the

estate agents must have been suspicious when a group of X wanted to rent a this place when
estate agents must have been suspicious when a group of X wanted to rent a this place when

they could have had a perfectly good penthouse suite with Riverside view.
they could have had a perfectly good penthouse suite with Riverside view.

And what about the gunpowder bought by a mercenary, a known Catholic sympathizer in peacetime.
And what about the gunpowder bought by a mercenary, a known Catholic sympathizer in peacetime.

Surely that must have raised somebody�s eyebrows.
Surely that must have raised somebody�s eyebrows.

Yes sir, how can I help you?
Yes sir, how can I help you?

Well, I would like to buy some gunpowder please.
Well, I would like to buy some gunpowder please.

Of course sir, how much would you like sir?
Of course sir, how much would you like sir?

Well, about three quarters of a ton would be lovely.
Well, about three quarters of a ton would be lovely.

Three quarters of a ton sir! You�re not planning on blowing anything up are you?
Three quarters of a ton sir! You�re not planning on blowing anything up are you?

Oh no, no, no, no, no, no! I am planning a fireworks display.
Oh no, no, no, no, no, no! I am planning a fireworks display.

A fireworks display? How lovely! Special occasion?
A fireworks display? How lovely! Special occasion?

My birthday.
My birthday.

Oh! Many happy returns sir!
Oh! Many happy returns sir!

Thank you very much indeed. I don�t suppose you do free delivery.
Thank you very much indeed. I don�t suppose you do free delivery.

But what really did it for us was a letter, a letter that was written by one of the gang
But what really did it for us was a letter, a letter that was written by one of the gang

to his brother in law. Francis Tresham�s brother-in-law was Lord
to his brother in law. Francis Tresham�s brother-in-law was Lord

Monty and as a Lord, was planning to be at the opening of Parliament on this very day.
Monty and as a Lord, was planning to be at the opening of Parliament on this very day.

So Francis Tresham wrote him a letter saying, to cut a long story short, �Make your excuses
So Francis Tresham wrote him a letter saying, to cut a long story short, �Make your excuses

on November the 5th because something bad was going to happen and if you have any Lord
on November the 5th because something bad was going to happen and if you have any Lord

friends that you would like to tell do feel free but burn the letter afterwards.�
friends that you would like to tell do feel free but burn the letter afterwards.�

Well this letter gave Lord Monty a little problem; he could act on it and hope that
Well this letter gave Lord Monty a little problem; he could act on it and hope that

when 50 Catholic peers failed to turn up for Parliament on opening day, that nobody was
when 50 Catholic peers failed to turn up for Parliament on opening day, that nobody was

suspicious or use it to get in with the King and hand it over. Well, whatever he was going
suspicious or use it to get in with the King and hand it over. Well, whatever he was going

to do, the king was sure to find out. So, don�t they come at the appointed hour
to do, the king was sure to find out. So, don�t they come at the appointed hour

and catch me red-handed; they take me off to the torture chamber where of course, I
and catch me red-handed; they take me off to the torture chamber where of course, I

tell them absolutely everything! It hurts and they are very good at it.
tell them absolutely everything! It hurts and they are very good at it.

So what of the rest of the gang? Well Robert Catesby, Thomas Winter, Kit Wright and Thomas
So what of the rest of the gang? Well Robert Catesby, Thomas Winter, Kit Wright and Thomas

Percy went up north trying to drum up some more support for our Catholic rebellion but
Percy went up north trying to drum up some more support for our Catholic rebellion but

it�s cold, it�s wet, it�s rainy, it�s windy, it�s England, it�s November, nobody
it�s cold, it�s wet, it�s rainy, it�s windy, it�s England, it�s November, nobody

particularly wants to uprise. So they would head off to Holbeach house in
particularly wants to uprise. So they would head off to Holbeach house in

Staffordshire to plot their next move where somebody comes up with a great idea of drying
Staffordshire to plot their next move where somebody comes up with a great idea of drying

their gunpowder in front of the fire. Surprisingly the resultant explosion fails to kill any
their gunpowder in front of the fire. Surprisingly the resultant explosion fails to kill any

of them but it is loud enough to alert the local police force who turn up the next morning
of them but it is loud enough to alert the local police force who turn up the next morning

with 200 rifles. True to themselves, the plotters had to escape
with 200 rifles. True to themselves, the plotters had to escape

by charging the policemen armed only with their swords. They die on the doorsteps, it�s
by charging the policemen armed only with their swords. They die on the doorsteps, it�s

like Butch Cassidy in The Sundance Kid. Interestingly, the same bullet kills Robert Catesby and Thomas
like Butch Cassidy in The Sundance Kid. Interestingly, the same bullet kills Robert Catesby and Thomas

Percy. So there you have it, they tried to blow up
Percy. So there you have it, they tried to blow up

the parliament and failed and on this night and ever since, the English have celebrated
the parliament and failed and on this night and ever since, the English have celebrated

by proving that we are not all useless with gunpowder and setting fire to many thousands
by proving that we are not all useless with gunpowder and setting fire to many thousands

of pounds of fireworks in a short a time as possible. And to top it off, they like to
of pounds of fireworks in a short a time as possible. And to top it off, they like to

make an effigy of yours truly, cart it around in the streets in a wheelbarrow collecting
make an effigy of yours truly, cart it around in the streets in a wheelbarrow collecting

money for good causes, so somebody gets the benefit. A bit disappointing they insist on
money for good causes, so somebody gets the benefit. A bit disappointing they insist on

throwing the effigy on to the fire. Anyways, I can�t hang around here, I�ve
throwing the effigy on to the fire. Anyways, I can�t hang around here, I�ve

got to hang around over there. Thank you.
got to hang around over there. Thank you.