Okay, here we go.
When I was in high school, I had the perfect life.
I was already cheer captain.
I had the hot boyfriend.
And all that was left was prom queen.
There's been a mistake and I'm in the wrong room.
Dr. Johnson to the third floor. The cheerleader just woke up.
Not to be a bitch, but cheer captain.
Cheer captain.
Hello?
Didn't have the heart to change it.
Madonna's now called Lady Gaga?
-No. -No.
Everybody else just got to go on and live their lives
and I'm supposed to just jump forward?
I just found out there's eight more Fast & Furious movies.
I want to go back to school, finish my senior year.
They can't let an almost 40-year-old into high school.
High school was just like yesterday for me. It will not be weird at all.
-Where do popular kids sit? -We're all popular.
No, there's only three ways to become popular.
To be a cheerleader,
to work at Abercrombie,
or to let guys go in the back door.
-What? -I must be really popular then.
I think I've worked this out.
You get followers by being somebody everybody likes.
-Hey, Steph. Holy shit! -I'm doing a makeup tutorial.
For who? Batman villains?
Does it ever get exhausting trying to make everybody like you?
I'm gonna do something I wish I'd had the confidence to do
twenty years ago.
Be my real self.
Yeah!
You might lose prom queen twice.
Don't go chasing waterfalls, Steph.
-Slut bag. -Possum pussy.
Rumpel-slut-skin.
What even is this squad? Is there a cheer captain?
-I am the cheer captain. -I am the cheer captain.
I am the cheer captain.
Do you love it?
-That is the most fucked up thing. -Steph.
You turned high school into a Hogwarts without the magic.
How dare you?
It is like Hogwarts with the magic.
I had more fun going like this…
than this high school.