Hey cultivator. Welcome back to my channel in today's video.
I want to chat with you about how to recover from a toxic work
environment, or maybe even being laid off or fired or let go.
I've worked with a lot of job seekers over these years,
and I know that any time that you've had a negative work experience that really
weighs on you and you carry it on to your job search and possibly into
your next workplace. And after working with so many job seekers through this,
I realized that they tend to get into their own heads.
And oftentimes it almost feels paralyzing.
Like I don't even know where I can add value or what it is that I want to do
next because they just feel like they've placed a lot of blame and guilt on
themselves,
but also it's just never a good feeling to be in a negative
experience or workplace environment.
I know a lot of us may take that into our own lives and feel
like we have ownership over that.
Like as if it's our fault that we were in that position.
So whether it's guilt or shame,
or just really heavy feelings that you're ready to let go of,
I would like to share with you some of my favorite tools and exercises
to help you work through that so that you can come out on the other side,
just feeling really energetic and positive about your next chapter.
Before we dig in, if you have not yet subscribed to the channel,
hit subscribe because we release a new video every Thursday around career
hacks, mindset tools, and job search tips. Without further ado,
let's dig into this video.
Now, the first thing I will say,
if you are trying to recover from a toxic work environment is to really just
take some time and space that you need to heal from this traumatic experience.
Give yourself the permission to just heal and process and
feel all of the emotions that you need to feel.
It might feel like moments of victim mentality. Like,
of course this would happen to me. This is my fault. This is what I attract.
It might move into anger, whatever that might be for you,
your situation is very unique and different.
Just really allow yourself that time and that space.
I really mean this because I know a lot of people,
they go into problem-solving mode whenever
they are let go or laid off or something negative happen,
they just want to immediately execute on a solution,
which is also how I usually operate. So just let me start off by saying,
give yourself that permission,
give yourself that time and space that you need so that you can properly
go in and go a lot faster. I always say like,
sometimes you need to take one step back to get 10 steps ahead,
but you will not lose momentum and energy in your job search actually by
giving yourself this space and this time upfront,
you're going to start attracting the right opportunities for you. All right.
The next thing I want you to do is take a look and give yourself an honest
assessment around what you could have done differently or what you want to do
differently in the future.
It's important that we all understand we have our own choices.
We have complete control over our responses and our reactions towards anything
in life.
This is the part where it really becomes more of a lesson learned and a learning
opportunity that you can take with you to avoid anything that has happened in
the past. So if you have any coworkers,
anybody that you can really trust to lean in on this is also a time to ask them
for any constructive feedback and you can soften it by sharing something
negative first. So for instance, instead of just asking, you know,
do you have any feedback or suggestions on what I can do most of the time people
are more apt to sharing if they have seen that you've
neutralized the playing field. So maybe what that sounds like is, "You know,
in the past I've been told that I could be quite defensive,
I'm working on that for me,
but I'm also trying to figure out like what I could do moving forward so that I
don't run into the situation again.
Do you have any constructive feedback that I can openly and honestly
just listen to so that I can really improve the situation moving forward".
So you can see that just by offering one of your own criticisms or negative
feedback or constructive feedback that you've received,
it opens up the room for more expansion and allowing that person to
also share without feeling like they're going to hurt your feelings or really
have to hold anything back that could be really instrumental in your future
development. And on the flip side of that spectrum, I also want you to ask,
what is it that I've done really well? What is it that I was really proud of?
What is it that I accomplished?
I find that oftentimes we place a lot of guilt and blame and we're our own worst
critics. When in reality,
there's actually so much that we can also acknowledge and really praise
ourselves for,
and give ourselves the permission to lean into those positive attributes that a
lot of us to be successful in so many ways.
So if you have found yourself again in a negative environment,
a toxic work environment, things weren't panning out,
as much as you want to learn the lesson there, you also want to tune into, well,
what did I do that was really great and tremendous?
How did I positively impact this last organization?
Those are the things that you really want to list out and return to them anytime
you're feeling like you're in this wallowing self pity state,
or you just don't feel motivated or excited about this next journey
that you're on,
because my sense is that you actually have quite a large amount of
contributions and accomplish and achievements that you brought to the table.
So write out as many of the wins you can think of small or large,
and just really return to these.
Not only are they going to help you shape up your resume and prepare you for
your interviews,but it'll also help you just remind yourself, because again,
we're our own worst critics
and oftentimes we just need to express that compassion to ourselves.
Really give ourselves that permission to acknowledge and celebrate the amazing
things that we have done.
So those are the next two steps that I really encourage you to do.
And of course, lean into this list,
place it somewhere that you can remind yourself of daily.
So that as you're going through this job search process,
as you may question, what did I do wrong in this last job?
Or why should this new company hire me?
You have an immediate list that you can look at and remind yourself, Oh yeah,
that was an isolated incident, but this is what I'm looking for in the future.
This is what I'm going to be doing differently in the future.
This is what I'm going to contribute to in the future.
That is really going to help you just come from a more positive and productive
space so that you can reach your actual goals that you're trying to achieve.
The next thing I want to remind you of is your past is not your future.
Your present is not your future.
And so when it's really important to understand is that you are again in full
control of your reactions and your responses.
And so if you're in this state and position today,
I really encourage you to ask, well,
just because something happened in the past, why does it have to happen again?
What can I do differently this time?
So that the same thing doesn't occur in the future.
I just want to emphasize that not every job and opportunity and
boss and colleague and team is the right fit for you.
And sometimes you're going to experience negative situations and
that's that.
That's just the lesson learned and something that's going to inform where you're
going in the future. So now is really the time to start visioning. Well,
if that didn't work for me, what does that mean? I am looking more for, right?
What is it that is important to me?
And how could you start to get really clear and intentional about what that next
opportunity would really need to have in order for you to thrive and be happy?
What is the values of the organization?
What are you really assessing the company for?
What was it that was missing that you need more of?
And the more you can tap into those and start to create your list and really
visualize what this opportunity looks like.
You now have a target that you can start positioning yourself towards.
And that is such a beautiful thing.
Just realizing that you're in full control of actually achieving and creating
this. So instead of living in the past,
like how can I start building towards the future?
And really it's as simple as that in making that decision of this is where I
am today. This is where I want to be.
This is where I'm going to start moving towards.
And just making that really powerful decision is really,
what's going to get you to where you need to be and where you want to be a lot
quicker when you have this vision in mind now is the fun part in terms of
starting to orient yourself with your personal brand, you're networking,
you're interviewing,
and just really getting curious about what is out there for you.
I hope that you enjoyed this video and if you find yourself in a toxic work
environment, again, just know that you are not alone.
There is a whole community of people who have experienced something very
similar. So there's no shame in that at all. And if you need support,
absolutely find your tribe. You know,
if you need to speak to a therapist or a career coach,
absolutely do that because what is bottling up inside is never going
to get resolved until you're able to address your thoughts and your feelings
head on. Let me know down in the comments below,
if you have experienced a negative work environment, toxic work environment,
how you overcame that, or what you felt was most helpful for you.
I'd love to hear just any tips and advice that you have for our community as
always, if you have not yet subscribed, be sure to like this video, share it,
comment, subscribe, because I'm going to be releasing this video next week.
And until then, I hope you continue to cultivate your life and your career.