Is anyone who knows more about cats than me able to tell me why my cat is rubbing her
face against my pants? Hello my name’s Luke Cutforth
Hi I’m Zoe and my question is if you were arrested with no context what would your friends
and family think you had done? Oh.
Uhh… Uhh…
I don’t think you’d kill a man.I did once have a dream where I killed a man and then
I thought I’d killed a man for about two weeks and I was very worried about it.
If you found out I got arrested… If I was a worm would you still love me?
Yes, we’d still love, Declan.
You were probably fighting for something you believe in. Like: you saw some injustice in
the street and were like “I’,m not having that!”, then you went over and tried to
interrupt it and got into a fight. And you didn’t win the fight, but someone somehow
made is seem like you were the start of the fight, and then you were in prison.
I like the idea that I was fighting injustice, but that I lost the fight.
You lost the fight! So I’m principled, but I’m weak.
Yeah, yeah. Thanks.
I think that you would’ve accidentally outed MI5 or something. You accidentally come to
some conclusion in one of your videos just rambling, and the FBI will be like holy sh*#
he’s onto us, he’s giving out our trade secrets and you’d end up in prison and you’d
just be like “LOOK! I just have this brain and I just come up with things and I didn’t
mean for it to be correct and they think you are a spy or something.
Rachel thought I would’ve seen an injustice and got in a fight over it. Crucially I have
lost the fight, because I’m weak.
Yeah, you wouldn’t win the fight. It depends who you’re up against.
You’d f*** up Rachel! No.
You think it wouldn’t matter who I’m up against? I will always loose?
I can kick him in the balls. And I can bite him.
Yeah, Luke is not really a fighter! I punched u in the face!
I’m not a fighter, like!
“I punched you in the face!”, and look where it got him he’s still beautiful! Yeah
I lost didn’t I?
Ahhhh! Ow I actually hit my head.
Declan McKenna punches ME in the face!
A lot of people think it’s real! Who do you want me to punch in the face next? Let
me know.
If Declan got arrested what would you think he got arrested for?
Activism? Yeah, maybe extinction rebellion? He’d so something really stupid though!
Like, be at extinction rebellion, move your hand and you knock over an old lady.
You could have got in a fight at a football match about-
At a football match?! Yeah!
Like, someone says something just so clearly hateful…
Yeah I do actually imagine that could happen at a football match. I’ve imagined that
scenario, been at a football match, heard someone say something a bit iffy and been
like… READY. Hey! 75 year old lonely man, for whom this
is the only solace to a cold and miserable life. Racism in football has been stamped
out now, and you must stop. Why would Rachel be arrested? What is this?
Being too.. weirdly kinky. I can’t say the real reason!
[RING RING] Oh, Rachel’s in jail. What? Why did she
get arrested? And the answer is….
Sneaking into something I’d say, like, pretending to be a photographer at some-
The Olympic Games! You get caught and then you get into this
lie. You’re at the olympics and you’re stuck in this lie. And I’m in the crowd
arguing with some old guy… Homophobia.
He still believes… I believe in homophobia! We just want our homophobia back. I want my
homophobia to be back, and I want it to be British.
I reckon you would have got a comment from some creepy man and you’ll have bit him,
pierced the skin, and maybe taken out a chunk of flesh.
I’d get put in jail for cannibalism because I’d eat the flesh. You swallow it? Scary.
This is what I live with. Hi! I’m cute. This is a whole video called “why we got
arrested”. SUBSCRIBE!
3/4 of what we’re filming is not going to be in this video.
Yeah, of course, that’s the point, just keep filming. You find some gold.
Wow you’re like Alfie Deyes!Hell yeah!I’m not a Tory.
For a couple of months I watched David Cameron giving speeches on the tele and I was like
“yeah he’s got a point!” Right well, let’s vote for him. Luckily I never did.
Is Alfie Deyes a Tory? NO!
I’m not a Tory! I’m not a Tory!
We’re not Tories- We love Jesus-
In this house. We like vegetables and have a cat named Mouse.
We’re not Tories in our home. We just like to eat scones when we’re alone.
We’re not Tories. Not in this establishment. You can’t deny our fantablishment.
That’s not a word! We’re not Conservatives.
Tories! What’s the stories?
It’ll get pretty gory if you say that we’re Tories again.
We’re not Tories. There’s no glory in being a Tory.
We just have a hot tub. It doesn’t mean we like to shoot fox cubs.
We’re not … even centre right. And that’s alright.
But we just might….. Vote Lib Dem.
[Laughter] That was a beautiful song, Declan. Thank you
for that. Stream The Key To Life On Earth now on Spotify.
Goodbye!