If she's in a relationship with you,
why does she feel the need
to flirt with other individuals?
I would say that if she's really into you,
she's not interested in flirting with other people,
but if she insists on doing that,
then yes, there is a reasonable
question to be asked.
Is this woman just playing you?
(Music)
Hey, what's up everybody,
this is Stephan Labossiere
aka Stephan Speaks
back with another relationship advice video
for men, all right.
Today we're talking about
the five signs you're dating a female player.
Now, before we get into this as always
be sure to like this video,
subscribe to the channel,
click that bell for those notifications,
and leave your comment below,
what's a sign that you feel should be included
on signs you're dating a female player?
Now, we hear about
men being players all the time,
but let's not fool ourselves.
There's plenty of women playing games.
There's plenty of women pimping out here, all right
and running circles around some men
and using them for all they can.
And so, I want to shed some light
because some of you may have come across it
or you may come across this issue.
Now, as always understand
I don't want you to see a sign
and just cut her off.
I don't want you to see a sign
and jump to a negative conclusion.
I want you to address the red flag,
address the issue
and then, if it is not corrected
or you don't feel comfortable
with the answer she gave you about it
now you can proceed with letting go, all right.
So, let's get to...
Oh, and one more thing,
for the women watching this
you all may get triggered
I'm just going to be real with you.
You may get triggered hearing some of these things.
Please number one, this is for the men,
but two,
if you are one of these women
or fall under one of these signs
don't just take it personally.
One, be real with yourself
maybe you are playing games and you don't realize it
or maybe you just need to be real
and say okay you know what,
I have been going down that path
for being a player and playing games
and I need to fix that, all right.
But either way, I got to focus on the men,
so let me get back to these guys.
All right, so men,
five signs are you're dating a female player.
Sign number one,
she has a lot of male friends
who do things for her.
Now, here's a thing,
there's a lot of women out there
who have more male friends than female friends.
That, I don't want that to be the issue
because there's various reasons for that.
Now, granted
that could speak to
a different kind of issue going on,
but as far as her being a female player,
her having more male friends than women
doesn't automatically mean that.
The problem is when you start noticing that
all these men friends
are constantly doing things for her.
It's very possible
that she is in what I call pimp mode, all right.
And she has learned how to use
these men's desires for her
to her advantage to get what she wants,
Because as men let's be real,
we know that a lot of times
when a man is a woman's friend
he may have interest.
And if your girl is a good looking woman,
even a greater chance that he has interest.
That isn't to say
there's no real platonic male-female friendships,
but we know what's up
a lot of them aren't really like that.
A lot of them that guy is just waiting for an opportunity
to get her in bed
or to make her his girl.
So, she may understand that
and she's using that to her advantage
and what adds to that sign is
when you address it with her
she wants to dismiss it,
oh, you're being unreasonable,
you're being insecure.
But no, there's a real issue
because at the end of the day,
she should not be going to all these different men
for her needs anyway.
She should be coming to you,
but again, a female player
ain't worried about
who she should be getting this from,
she's just worried about getting it.
She's worried about getting all the benefits she can
from whoever she can.
So, when she has a lot of male friends
who constantly are doing things for her
that is a sign.
Sign number two
you're dating a female player,
she's very flirtatious.
Now listen,
a woman who's a player
knows flirting is one of men's weaknesses.
It's one of the ways to manipulate men.
If you know how to smile and talk to a man
you can get a lot out of him, okay.
And so, when this woman
has this constant desire to flirt
that is a concern.
Again, there are some people who just
like flirting but we can make the argument that
well, you want an extra level of attention and why?
If she's in a relationship with you,
why does she feel the need
to flirt with other individuals?
I would say that if she's really into you,
she's not interested
in flirting with other people,
but if she insists on doing that,
then yes, there is a reasonable question to be asked.
Is this woman just playing you?
Is this woman just using you for attention?
You're just an extra piece to the puzzle
of her getting attention validation.
Again, I don't want you to
immediately assume the woman who flirts
that she's just playing you.
In some cases, I feel the need to say this.
In some cases yes,
she may have had issues
that contributed to why she feels the need
to constantly flirt with people.
But simply bring that to her attention
she'd be willing to correct it
if she's really into you
and serious about you.
But again, like I mentioned in number one,
if you bring it up and she just dismisses you
and calls you crazy, we got a problem.
Sign number three
you're dating a female player,
she gets very upset
when you don't give her what she wants.
Women who are playing men
understand that
anger is a great manipulation tactic, all right.
And so, now those women
they're looking to get what they can get
and they're either going to ask you
directly or indirectly.
So, she's either going to be very straightforward
about paying her bills
or taking her somewhere or whatever
or she's going to take a very indirect approach
and try to make it very subtle.
Either way, she's going to get the message across
that this is what she wants
and this is what is required
if you expect to keep dealing with her.
But again, when you don't live up to that
or when you decline
she will use anger as a manipulation tactic.
Listen, a woman who's really into you
and loves you is not going to be quick to get mad
when you're unable to give her
what she wants, all right.
It doesn't mean of course, as a man
you shouldn't be pouring into your woman
and things of that nature,
but your woman who loves you
isn't trying to just run you dry
and get everything she can get out of you.
She's going to be mindful of
what is best for you guys as a unit
and what's going to be reasonable for your budget
and where you are and things of that nature.
She will take that into account
when she's serious about you.
But the player doesn't give a damn
all she cares is
what can she get.
And again, not only will she use anger
to get you to give in to her.
She'll also use those other male friends
we talked about in number one.
She will essentially get someone else
and say, oh, you see this person gave me this
or that person gave me that, to guilt you
into feeling like you better step it up
because she got other options.
Once again, signs of a player
and you got to take heed to that.
Do not let anger
push you into doing stuff or going broke for a woman
trying to impress her
or trying to make sure she doesn't leave you.
Do not behave in that insecure way.
Again, nothing wrong with doing for your woman,
but she should be...
She should respect you
and value you enough
to not simply want to use you
or put you in an uncomfortable position
or in a position that's going to be
not smart for you financially
in order to get what she wants.
Sign number four
you're dating a female player,
she's emotionally detached.
So listen, again,
I'm not going to sit here and say
that every emotionally detached woman
is being a player.
I will say though that,
I want to say every player is emotionally detached.
There may be some exception to the rule,
but for the most part,
female players understand
they're not trying to be vulnerable.
The reason why they're players
chances are is because they've already been hurt.
They've already been let down by men
so now they have this mentality of
I'm looking out for myself.
And in order to manage that,
they have to be detached.
They can't get emotionally invested
because in their mind,
that's what got them in trouble before.
That's how they get hurt,
that's how they let their walls down
and now they lose their "power"
that they think they have being a player.
So, that woman is going to remain detached
she is going to come off
like one of those dudes who can be "a guy" so to speak.
She's the woman who's going to be more likely
to be able to sleep with you and that's it
sex, go home, be done.
Now, again, some of you may be triggered
by that, but it's real.
The reality is that
the most women in that position
have already gone through some level
of heartbreak or trauma
and they've detached from their emotions
because they view that,
those emotions as the enemy.
They view vulnerability as the enemy.
So, the female player is going to be detached
and so she's going to be less loving,
she's going to be less nurturing,
she's going to be less concerned
about affection and all these other sweet things.
She's just there
to get the benefit she can get,
which also allows her
to more easily navigate
dealing with multiple men.
Because again,
for a woman to be able to entertain multiple men,
she can't really get invested
into one of them like that,
that throws everything off.
So, when you notice
that level of emotional detachment
don't just think oh, I got me a cool one
who's not stressing me out.
No, there might be something there
and you got to make sure
she's not just there to play you.
And then the last sign
that you're dating a female player
is she has you giving
way more than you're receiving.
Again, the female player's intention
is to get what she can get.
It's all about her
she don't give a damn about you,
she don't care about your feelings.
Now, if she's smart,
she will try to
play the role of caring a little bit.
But she will always make sure
she's getting way more than you.
So, for example,
she might buy you
a little nice thing for your car,
but you pay her car loan, all right.
She might get you something at Chick-fil-A,
but you'll pay for all kinds of groceries
and other bills.
Like, she's going to make sure
it's a way... A huge gap
between what she does for you
and what you do for her.
Now, again, I do not want you to confuse this
with providing for your woman.
Because I believe in providing for your woman
and I believe that
her return or what she gives you in exchange,
doesn't have to match you financially, all right.
She has to pour into you
in the ways that you need
and you have to embrace
pouring into her the ways that she needs.
However, you can tell
when the woman is just a selfish woman.
Again, the woman who's appreciative
isn't just giving little stuff here and there.
She's doing for you in different ways that she can.
She's making sure you're good,
she's making sure she's pouring love into you.
The female player ain't doing all that.
She's getting what she needs
or wants to get from you and that's it.
And again, she doesn't care if it leaves you broke.
She doesn't care what kind of compromising
position it puts you in.
She doesn't care if she guilts you into it.
All she cares is she gets what she wants
and please do not fall for that
because you have to understand and recognize
when you're dealing with a woman who just wants to use you
and is not intending to love you, all right.
So, those were
my five signs that you're dating a female player.
Again, be sure
leave a comment below
what's a sign you think maybe I missed
or maybe what's a sign
you've dealt with in the past.
I want to hear your feedback
be sure to like this video,
subscribe, hit that notification button,
and I look forward to seeing you in the next one.