We can't do this show without great people
behind the scenes.
Stage hands, production crews, and of course our own,
Conan Pages.
Let's give them a hand.
(applause)
The Conan pages.
Yeah, they're great!
They work hard behind the scenes.
I think they're doing a great job,
don't you, Andy?
Well
I like pages one through five, but I'm not sure about
page six.
You know the one that looks like Ellie Kemper?
Oh yeah!
(applause)
Yeah, okay great, yeah.
But I mean it.
I do not trust page six.
What portly LA visitor was seen drinking up a storm
at Bacio's last night?
No names, but our sources say he passed out under
a urinal "Andy" couldn't be revived.
(laughter)
Shut up, page six.
Take it easy Andy.
Weren't you at Bacio's last night?
Yeah, a lot of people were at Bacio's last night.
Can we just fire her, please?
Hold on Andy.
What else ya got page six?
Plenty Conan!
Tongues are still wagging after a certain
hefty TV B lister yelled at a coat check attendant
at the Samba Room last night.
Oh come on!
When she couldn't make change for his $100 bill,
the snippy sidekick through a five star fit.
(baby crying)
(laughter)
Look.
No.
That is not what happened.
Conan, this woman is bad news.
Look, Andy, I know she appeals to our lowest
instincts, but I just can't get enough, ya know?
Anything else, page six?
Which Boston born, carrot topped quipster,
paid $90,000 in black mail to stop the release
of his sex tape?
Alright!
I think we're done.
We're good.
The hour long video shows the freckled funny man in
10 filthy sex positions, and he's all by himself!
Alright!
(applause)
No. No.
That was pretty good.
Get out of here page, who looks like Ellie Kemper.
Bye everyone!
(applause)