Hey guys, how's it going? Good? Bad? I'll give both reactions just in case. "Oh, brilliant!" "Oh, I'm sorry." So today
I wanted to talk to you about some more weird stuff that I did when I was a kid as the other day I was
just thinking about it and I was like: "I was a really weird kid!" So here we go: some of the reasons why I was a weird kid 2.
I tried to flatten myself! When I was about five my mom used to read me a book called "Flat
Stanley" which was about a boy that got crushed by a pinboard above his bed and, instead of
obliterating his internal organs and making him die, he became a 2D person and have loads of
adventures going down drains to get people's keys and getting through cracks of girls' changing room doors
I don't know if that happened in the book, but I wanted to be Flat Stanley, so I thought: "Hey! Here's an idea;
why don't I crush myself with my pinboard, too? So I grabbed hold of each corners, pulled them on top of myself
and later thinking "Please be flat, please be flat, please be flat!"
Unfortunately it just give me a massive bang to the head, my parents were running like: "What's going ooon"
And I burst into tears saying: "I just wanted to be flat.." The bang to the head probably explains a few things
But yeah, that was a pretty weird thing
Moving on: I used to drown my teddy bears! I didn't like watching TV, I liked watching my teddy bears drown.
Yeah, I used t-*grins* I used to put all my teddy bears in the washing machine when my mom did a wash and I would sit there
The entire hour just watching them go around
And around as the machine slowly filled with water, it sounds like some kind of a saw trap
I don't know what I was thinking in time
Maybe it was hypnotizing me or something. My parents found it really weird, but apparently it can't be quiet. They were just like "Nah,
keeps him quiet.
Whatever makes the boy happy."
Thanks, mom!
Time to go for a spin!
Goodbye, old friend
Nooooou D: *sad pika*
I wouldn't eat without lions.
So I was the fussiest eater EVER as a child
And I think the only things I would eat was like chicken dippers and pancakes which, I mean, are good choices, really
but my parents wanted me to try new foods. We had this tape of "The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe" which was like my
favorite TV show; I would only eat the food under the following criteria, if: a) the room was pitch black,
b) the lion was on the screen and c) someone else was feeding me the food while I held my nose
Yeah, thankfully I grew out of that one, imagine going on a date with a girl
Mm, delicious food!
Oh, would you just put your hair around your face a bit?
Um, why?
Yeah, yeah and just say "I am Aslan" "Uhh, I am
Aslan" "Yeah, just- just say it like that"
*rawr*
It's over.
Oh..
But yeah, now I eat all the foods! Which is probably even worse.
I was a demon child.
I was the reason my parents didn't have any more children
Yeah, I'd wait for them to go to sleep and then stand about THIS far from their faces until they woke up, or in the corner
Just staring at them, like some kind of demon blair witch child and apparently I have like a completely emotionless expression just like
*emotionless expression*
Imagine that, just drifting slowly off to sleep and then waking up at 3:00 in the morning to
MOTHERRR
I'm sorry parents and unborn life wherever you are
Weird.
The shoelace incident.
So I was in primary school, I was about eight years old and we had a year assembly where the whole year
Just sit round and sings hymns and stuff
♪ He's got the whole world in his hands ♪
Hymns were really weird, anyway
I got this idea in my head that I should tie my shoelaces together. No one noticed
But then, when everyone got up to leave assembly, I fell over and everyone was like "are you okay Phil?"
What happened? At that point
I said "someone tied my shoelaces together!"
So the headmaster was like
"Nobody leaves this assembly until a culprit is found!"
So my entire year had to stay behind for an hour trying to work out who tied my shoelaces together, anyway it turned into a kind
Of primary school court case where the school bully Jenkins was put in the dock
"This seems like something Jenkins would do" "I didn't see anything but it might have been Jenkins" "I sentence you to death!"
So yeah, I got him sentenced to death, well, detention. I don't even know why I did it. What was wrong with me?
What was I doing? I must have had a temporary moment of insanity like the captain lady or something
*laughs* So yeah, that's probably one of the weirdest things I've done and I hope I'm not alone in being such a freak as a child
So please let me know in the comments if you did any weird stuff as a kid. Also, some news which you might not know
But me and Dan have our own Radio 1 show now
Woo! And the exciting thing is the whole thing is in vision and you can submit your own music videos to the tracks
So, if you want to get involved
Please make a music video to your favourite song and submit it to danandphil@bbc.co.uk
It doesn't have to be a masterpiece, it can be anything you want
Also, if you've already made a music video and want to submit that too then that would be cool, all the info about that is below.
I also got this t-shirt, do you like it? Check it out, how cool is this?
Yeah, I'm going to save it for a video where I'm stood up because then you'll be able to get the full guinea pig effect
Today's "Draw Phil Naked" is:
Goodbye!