- I do freestyle rap.
That is rap made up on the spot
based entirely on your suggestions.
We're going to get you guys involved.
I want you guys to be creative.
The best suggestion I ever had was a German man who said
"a day in the life of an Aztec high priest."
So try and beat Klaus from Hamburg, okay.
I want you to do better than that.
We'll get five suggestions.
If you've got one, all you gotta do, put your hand up,
my microphone man is going to run over to you,
we'll get the suggestion. Microphone man,
bring it down to this handsome chap in the front.
Lovely. Hey, what would you like a rap about my friend?
- I would like you to rap about Apogee Playground.
- I beg your pardon you, why did you suddenly go French?
When you said that you were like,
"Yeah, I'd like you to rap about
(mumbling)
What?
- Yep, It's called Apogee Playground.
- Apogee Playground.
Is that something that you're involved with?
- Exactly.
- That is the most disgraceful, self-promoting,
startup attitude I've ever heard of. Well done.
- Thank you.
- No one else is going to be allowed to do that.
You're the only per, pray tell what is Apogee Playground?
Keep it short. This is not a pitch.
- We are asking people to turn their work into play.
- Turn work into play with Apogee Playground.
If you post this online, you owe me a lot of money, okay?
- Yes I do.
- Apogee Playground, turn work into play.
Let's get our second suggestion. Hand up if you got one.
Oh yeah. Right behind you. Perfect.
So, what would you like a rap about?
- Baby influencers.
- Baby influencers. Thank you. That's perfect.
Let's get our third suggestion from the lady over there.
Apogee Playground, baby influences.
Yes. Go for it.
- Circular economy.
Circular.
- A circular pyramid?
- Economy
- Oh, economy.
I thought you said a circular pyramid. I was like,
she's trying to catch me out.
I also love that you stood up for that one.
And I was like, is she going to sing?
Is she going to take over this?
A circular economy, Apogee Playground, baby influencers.
People on this side,
what would you like a rap about?
My man here, busting out of the shirt? Yes.
What would you like to rap about?
- Fitness.
- Fitness, Okay. What, what's your particular favorite type
of fitness?
- Any kind.
- You're the most boring answer ever. Yeah okay.
I'm not giving you my secrets, Chris.
So you've got to work hard to get guns like these.
Let's get our final suggestion.
Yes, right there. Right by you.
- Hi, crypto please.
- Crypto, erm, be more specific.
- Hmm, Crypto trading? Does that help?
- Okay. No that's fine.
Yeah. Cool trading.
Okay. Crypto trading, fitness, baby influencers,
a circular economy, an Apogee Playground,
which aims to turn work in to play.
This, lovely people,
if we can drop that beat good sir, is a freestyle.
As I said, made up on the spot
based entirely on suggestions.
Not written, not prepared, not rehearsed,
never to be repeated, and do not worry.
It will not be anywhere near as atrociously,
embarrassingly, toe curling bad
as you're expecting a privately educated middle-class
white boy to be.
A little bit more on the beat there my friend.
Let's do this.
♪ The base kicks and we slay that sound. ♪
♪ I like the guy wants to clicks on the playground ♪
♪ at the top, that's the Apogee, I rap so naturally ♪
♪ I'm basically giving you an ad for free. ♪
♪ You've got to make sure you do it everyday. ♪
♪ We're going to turn that work into play. ♪
♪ Admittedly, it's slightly mental in the mind, why? ♪
♪ You should produce not just leisure time. ♪
♪ I'm going to move on, it's how we do. ♪
♪ I want to be circular, like number two. ♪
♪ I talk about the economy. I'm going to do it properly. ♪
♪ If I got the cash and you want to get it off of me, ♪
♪ you gotta make sure you keep interest. ♪
♪ I spend that gold and reinvest it goes round, ♪
♪ keep it like a closed loop. ♪
♪ Like I'm recycling things here, I ask you. ♪
♪ This guy, check the arms on him. ♪
♪ Always slayin pump iron when he's there at the gym. ♪
♪ I ask for explanation, can you charm me? ♪
♪ He's like ya, I pump iron like Arnie. ♪
♪ Arnold Schwarzenegger. And I impress all of the ladies. ♪
♪ When I do the fitness, I go there letting my guns swell. ♪
♪ I like to pump all of that wisdumbbells, ah so hard. ♪
♪ I go berserk I like to twerk in the mirror ♪
♪ when I clean and jerk. ♪
♪ Look at these, I'm a big bro. ♪
♪ Probably investing in crypto. I see that body. ♪
♪ It's not so strange. ♪
♪ I like the shape he be puttin it on the exchange. ♪
♪ Maybe get the Bitcoin ethereal Mor Doge ♪
♪ If you invest wisely, then it will grow. ♪
♪ But the last one, I like it. ♪
♪ Oh you crazy. Talk about this I'm an influencer baby. ♪
♪ I'm on the insta, taking the selfie. ♪
♪ I'm still in diapers, but I'm gonna get wealthy. ♪
♪ I get there, I make those moves. ♪
♪ I be making that cash while I suckle from a boob. ♪
♪ It might seem, kind of strange, ♪
♪ to be an infant that still make that change. ♪
♪ I say, mum, I say dad, can ya buy me a pacifier hashtag ad ♪
♪ You need to place it. That's the plan. ♪
♪ I've never seen a baby on Instagram. There we go. ♪
(hip-hop music continues)
(crowd applause and cheering)