good morning John I just want to start
off by saying to all the people who
don't know about none pizza with left
beef I'm here for you to bring you into
the glorious new future you will
experience within the next four minutes
for those of us who know about non pizza
with left beef come along with me on
this journey there are better things in
the world that none pizza with left beef
but not very meant it was October 2007 a
man goes to dominos dot-com where they
have introduced a new feature that
allows you to order pizza without
talking to a human being and so for
cheese this intrepid explorer chose none
and for sauce likewise he ventured none
and yet for beef he chooses normal and
he chooses left I don't know what the
non normal choices were that websites
gone and the good people at Domino's did
the only thing they could do they cooked
some pizza crusts and just tossed some
beef balls in their tumblr also launched
in 2007 I'll remind you that the iPhone
also launched in 2007 and also
vlogbrothers it was an important year
thing that we often forget about tumblr
the thing that makes it really such a
fantastic platform is that every time
you reblog and add something that itself
becomes content and that piece of
content in the future cannot be lost it
becomes attached to and is carried
through with that media on to all the
other places it will go but this one
says 10 years into the future and I will
still be laughing about this it's now 12
years in the future and I am still
laughing about this and in the final
edition someone orders nun pizza with
left beef and the man at the Domino's
calls her back and he says miss you
can't do that but you can you can and
you must I maintain that no one would
ever call a Domino's and say I want nun
pizza with left beef you need the
interface between you and the person
making the pizza so that you don't feel
this weirdness similar vein a man
recently ordered a cheeseburger and then
took off all of the things until he was
left with the cheese you cannot ask for
and pay 99 cents for a cheese from a
person it's not funny anymore it's only
funny when you punch it into a screen
and then you imagine that
I think the person on the other end is
also giggling a little bit thinking I
guess I'm gonna make a cheese we will
never again live in a world without none
pizza and left beef and as long as I
have neurons firing together I will have
neurons dedicated to the existence of
nun pizza with left be anyway John I
finished my book why is there music
playing I can't go outside and do a
pizza miss dance there's a freaking
blizzard
[Music]
I
okay I forgot one of the stinking shirts
at home
oh my god my friend Garth no this is the
shirt that I forgot to bring to the park
it's maybe my favorite why I'm cold I
like this one too that's nice that's
very cool and yes I finished a draft of
my book and it's the biggest news of my
year and I didn't have time to talk
about it because I was too busy talking
about none pizza with left beef John if
you want to ask me questions about it
I'm probably gonna be talking about on
Thursday John I'll see you tomorrow
I mean I hope the books good but it's
not gonna be as good as nun pizza with
left bee