-Marlon Wayans! -Thank you.
-Looking good, bud. -Thank you.
-As always, looking good. -I'm fangirling right now.
I just got a peek of Willem Dafoe.
I didn't get to meet him, but I got to see him.
-Yeah, that's all you really need to do.
-He has, like, one of the most distinct faces.
-It's unbelievable.
-Although, with the mustache, he looks like
Professor Hinkle from "Frosty the Snowman."
[ Laughter ]
But he just always, like --
I knew he was Green Goblin even with the mask on.
He has a very distinct face. -Yeah, you just knew it was him.
-Like, even if he had played Spider-Man with the mask,
he'd still be like... -Yeah. You know.
You look great, bud. -Thank you, man.
-Is this true? You turned 50?
-Yeah, you know that Black don't crack unless you smoke it.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-What are you talking about?
-Let's be clear, Jimmy. I turned Black 50.
[ Laughter ] -What is Black 50?
-Oh, it's different than white 50.
It's, uh -- [ Laughter ]
Black 50 is like -- We, like, 25 in the face
and, like, 82 in the prostate.
You know what I mean?
[ Laughter ]
[ Cymbals crash ]
White 50 look like it hurt. Oh, my God. Ohh!
I see my white friend's 50, I just hug them like,
"You ain't gonna make it to 51."
[ Laughter ]
-You got to celebrate it, though, with your son.
-I just celebrated his 21st, which was awesome.
-Is that right? -Yeah, so, I flew in to Miami,
and we was gonna party all day.
And, you know, I was down for it.
So I flew in, and we went to Club 11 for breakfast,
which is a strip club, so...
That's how you want to spend 21.
And then that night we went to Live,
and I get a text from my son at like 2:00
and he's like, "We out."
I was there until 7:00 in the morning.
I don't know which one of us turned 50.
[ Laughter ]
-Kids don't want to hang out late anymore.
-I don't know. I'm like, "You ain't got no job.
Why are you going home?"
-That's wild, though. That's crazy.
-Yes. -You know what's interesting?
I just don't feel the need to stay out that late anymore.
-That's 'cause you're rich, Jimmy.
Uh...
Rich people just want to go to sleep just to count their money.
"I don't need to go out. We'll bring out in."
-[ Laughs ] Bring out in.
-Speaking of rich, listen. I'm hosting -- I'm guest hosting
"The Daily Show," and I need a guest.
And...
[ Cheers and applause ]
-What are you talking about?
-And I figure you owe me like 12, right?
Because I come on this show and I give you a break.
You just be like --
[ Laughter ]
And I just sit here,
and I blap, blap, blap, blap, blap, blap.
Because some guests, it's like pulling teeth.
You know what I mean? I don't know how to do this.
Your part -- I don't know how to ask questions.
I'll be like this --
[ Laughter ]
[Snorts] "Yeah, give it up for Marlon Wayans."
-What are you talking about? -I need a guest.
So I need you to come on "The Daily Show"
and let me interview you.
We don't know anything about you.
I want to know why haven't you let me come to the Hamptons.
I want to know...
how come you hang with the brother from the "Hamilton,"
but I can't be in a pool with you?
What's up with that? [ Laughter ]
-How do you know I was in a pool with the dude from "Hamilton"?
-I was going to --
I was personally going to reach out and talk to you, right,
and invite you on to be my guest, but then I realized
I ain't got your number, so what I did...
was I used this opportunity to be like,
"Yo, Jimmy, come on 'The Daily Show.'
Let me holla at you."
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Marlon, I let "The Daily Show" come to me.
-Ooh!
[ Audience ohhs ]
Ohh! Ohh!
Shots fired! Shots fired! Ohh!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Shots fired!
Ooh!
That was good, Jimmy. -That was not bad.
-That was good. See, that's why I wanted you as my guest.
I knew you had jokes. They don't know.
See, you had to come from behind the desk.
Behind the desk, it emasculates you.
You come over here, and you start doing jokes at people.
[ Laughter ] -Unbeliev--
What are they going to do?
"The Daily Show." What are they going to do with Marlon Wayans?
-I don't know. Nail me to the seat.
Because I don't know how I'm-a sit down.
I'm not good at that.
-I can't see you behind a desk. -I can't see me behind a desk.
-Get rid of that desk. -My teachers couldn't see me
behind a desk 'cause I was cutting class.
[ Laughter ]
-I want to talk to you about -- There's two things.
Well, first, let's just talk about "God Loves Me."
-Yes. -Congratulations on this.
-Thank you.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-HBO Max. -Yes.
-Why is it called "God Loves Me"?
-Because I think God loves all of us,
but he really loves me.
[ Laughter ]
Because I feel like cataclysmic things happen
in the world that have nothing to do with you, per se,
but then you think about it,
and it has everything to do with you.
And one of those events to me was SlapGate.
And when Chris Rock and Will had that --
Yeah, when Will hit him, life went like --
[Whooshing] for me.
Maybe Will hit him that hard that I --
It changed my life,
and so I know Will, Chris, and Jada,
and I was just like,
"Yo, somebody got to talk about this story
from a loving, funny perspective."
And so I called it "God Loves Me"
because that slap had nothing to do with the three of them,
had everything to do with me.
[ Laughter and applause ]
-I'm sorry. I'm so lost.
How did it have anything to do with you?
-I don't know, but even -- Look.
It's like -- Questlove. Why is he everywhere?
And it ain't got nothing to do with him?
He was right there like, "Oh, my God!"
[ Laughter ]
I seen the brother clutch his pearls.
He said, "What?!"
-[ Laughs ] Pearls. -But he's everywhere.
One night, it was me, Dave Chappelle,
Chris Rock, all of us on stage.
And I look on stage, and I'm like,
"What the hell is Questlove doing here?"
You look through history, you are the Black Forrest Gump.
He's gonna be...
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
In classic pictures. Him and Malcolm X by the window.
Like...
The Martin Luther King assassination.
[ Laughter ]
-He's everywhere. -Right.
-January 6th at Pelosi's desk.
[ Laughter and applause ]
-Oh, my -- Dude.
-Ohh! -Ohh!
-Shots fired!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
-Dude. Good luck, "Daily Show." You can't hold him down.
Marlon Wayans, everybody.
"Marlon Wayans: God Loves Me." -Thank you.
-"God Loves Me" premieres Thursday on HBO Max.
More "Tonight Show" after the break.