♪ What can I say ♪
♪ Except you're welcome ♪
- I'm Jonathan Decker, The Movie Therapist.
Today, I want to talk about "Moana" and trauma.
Which doesn't seem to be the core theme of "Moana".
And if you've seen the film, in fact,
it goes through a whole different track,
and then at the end, it throws you a major curve ball
that has moved a lot of people, including me.
You do not have to be defined by your trauma.
"Moana" is gonna show us how, I'm The Movie Therapist.
Let's do this.
(upbeat jazz music) (crowd cheering)
As a licensed therapist,
I have helped a lot of people who have been traumatized,
and they've been through a lot, big variety of traumas.
Whether they've witnessed something horrific,
experienced something horrific, something was done to them,
something that completely shattered their worldview
or their sense of safety,
whether it was one major thing or a lot of major things
or smaller things, I mean, there's a whole spread
of what could have happened,
but they all share one defining trait.
All of the people that I have seen,
at least at first, are defined by their trauma.
Let me tell you what I mean by this.
For some people, their life was happy.
They thought their world was safe.
And then they realized that it wasn't.
Something terrible happened, and it forever change them.
For other people, they were raised in trauma.
They were brought up being abused.
Either way, this has a big hand in shaping who they are.
Whether they see themselves as a victim,
and their world as unsafe, and people are not to be trusted,
and I need to be taken care of
'cause I can't take care of myself.
Or whether they see themselves as an advocate or a survivor.
I used to think that trauma recovery meant guiding people
from victim to survivor and advocate,
from somebody who is afraid and feels unprepared,
from someone who is full of anger and rage
and hate and fear because of what happened,
to somebody who is at peace
and is using their experience to help others.
That's what I saw the track was,
and that's incredibly empowering.
But my wife brought to my attention
that's still being defined by the trauma.
Who I am is a survivor or an advocate or a victim.
I'm no longer a music lover.
I'm no longer somebody who wants to be a painter,
or who wants to get this degree,
or who wants to have this type of relationship,
or accomplish this thing.
For many trauma survivors, it's hard to have a life again.
You may remember Elizabeth Smart.
Elizabeth Smart was abducted from her Utah home,
taken from her family and held captive by religious fanatics
who brought her on to be one of the wives,
who sexually abused her, who tried to brainwash her,
who gaslit her and emotionally abused her,
physically abused her, did all sorts of terrible things.
And this went on for a long time.
And when she was found, when she escaped,
when she was saved and rescued,
of course, I'm sure she did a lot of trauma counseling,
a lot of work in this.
And she became known, heroically, as an advocate for women,
as an advocate for fellow trauma survivors,
as someone who stood up to keep women safe
and to teach them how to keep themselves safe,
and if something happened, how to not blame themselves,
and instead how to grow past it.
And that was her defining trait in the public eye.
But that trauma still defined her.
What's beautiful about Elizabeth Smart
is she has a whole other life now.
Yes, this is part of her history.
She served a mission for her church.
She has a husband, she has kids.
She has a career.
There is more to her than just the trauma.
How did she get there?
Well, this is where "Moana" comes in.
If you've seen the story Te Fiti, the goddess,
the island goddess, has her heart stolen by Maui.
And the island dies and Te Fiti dies.
And then Ka rises up,
this vicious monster who wants to take the heart from Maui.
And Moana's mission is to get the heart back.
And Maui, he's sorry for what he did,
so he wants to help her.
So they get to where the dead island is
and where the goddess Te Fiti is no more,
and they do battle with Ka.
And Moana gets to the island, and there's nothing there,
just the outline of Te Fiti's body.
And Moana looks across the water and realizes something.
And this is what we're gonna watch.
(dramatic music)
(Ka roaring)
(Moana gasping)
- [Maui] Te Ka!
(Maui chanting in foreign language)
- Now, he's distracting Ka to save Moana.
Moana showing great bravery.
(slow music)
And Moana can talk to the ocean, the ocean listens to her.
But she saw in Ka's chest,
the symbol of Te Fiti.
- Let her come to me.
(waves whooshing)
- This whole time, we've assumed that Ka
was just some vicious demon god or goddess.
(dramatic music)
(Ka roaring) (thunder cracking)
She was scary, and full of rage, and not lovable,
to be avoided.
(singing in foreign language)
♪ I have crossed the horizon to find you ♪
(singing in foreign language)
♪ I know your name ♪
(singing in foreign language)
♪ They have stolen the heart ♪
♪ From inside you ♪
(singing in foreign language)
♪ But this does not define you ♪
(singing in foreign language)
♪ This is not who you are ♪
♪ You know ♪
♪ Who you are ♪
Who you truly are.
(slow music) (crackling)
- Puts the heart back where it belongs,
which was always her mission.
And we see that Ka
is the beautiful goddess Te Fiti and always has been.
- Te Fiti. (singing in foreign language)
- Spoiler alert.
I'll get to this, but this is you watching at home.
And the beautiful, powerful
being of light and life
and goodness and peace- (singing in foreign language)
I love the lyrics.
"I've crossed the horizon to find you,
I know your name."
And then she says,
"They have stolen the heart from inside you."
Now, if we were going strictly according to the story
of the film it would be,
"He stole the heart from inside you," right?
Maui.
But the screenwriters chose to address a deeper truth.
When they say "They," it could be anybody.
It could be an abusive mother,
could be abusive father,
boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife,
stranger, uncle, anybody who's hurt you.
Brother, sister, friend, they.
They have stolen the heart from inside you.
I can't tell you how many people I meet with,
they say, "I don't like who I've become.
There was a me that was happy,
there was a me that did good,
there was a me that spread light and joy,
and they stole it from me."
He stole it from me, she stole it from me,
they took it away.
And then Moana says, "But this does not define you.
They have stolen the heart from inside you,
but this does not define you."
I know a lot of trauma survivors who,
this hit them like a truck.
That being of light and goodness,
you may think you can never get back.
You experience too much, you've hurt too much,
you've angered too much, you've hated too much,
you've feared too much to ever go back to where you were.
And while it is true that your history is your history
and you can't go back to the state
of not knowing or not having experienced that,
you can be that figure of light and beauty and life again.
Elizabeth Smart, the reason she went on
to not just be an advocate,
and I shouldn't say just an advocate,
an advocate and a survivor is a powerful thing,
it's a beautiful thing.
And that can be part of who you are.
But the reason she served a mission for her church,
the reason she got married, the reason she had a family,
the reason she has a career
is because her trauma was not going to define her.
She was going to have a life.
And that comes from knowing who she was.
You watching at home,
you're a god, you're a goddess.
Now, to some that may be sacrilege.
I'm not trying to get all theological here.
I'm talking figuratively, I'm talking who you are inside.
You're somebody capable of incredible good.
You're somebody capable of incredible power.
You're somebody capable of incredible healing.
But if you believe you're not, then you won't.
If you believe you're broken, then you'll stay that way.
The way that you heal is to embrace the light inside you.
The way that you heal is to choose not to hate.
You don't ever have to trust,
you don't have to let anybody into your life
who has hurt you,
and you can definitely let them face
the consequences for their actions,
but when you choose not to hate,
when you choose to focus on who you can love,
when you choose to focus
on what your gifts are to the world,
and yes, if you need the help,
getting support so that your light can be mended, right?
That light inside of you can be fixed.
The heart can be put back in.
Let us help you.
We are here for that.
So are many others.
You can be whole again.
Now, at Mended Light, that's our mission,
that's what we do, that's our whole purpose,
is to help you shine your light again.
I am The Movie Therapist.
If you enjoyed this little segment,
we have many more for you to check out.
"Big Fish" and infidelity, "Star Wars" and anger,
"The Incredibles" and vulnerability,
and many, many more to come.
If you enjoyed this, please share it,
please like, subscribe.
Tell the world, shout it from the rooftops.
If you have an experience with overcoming trauma
or working through it, or finding your light again,
or if you have questions on how to do so,
please let us know in the comments below.
I'm Johnathan Decker, The Movie Therapist,
and I'll see you next time.
(upbeat jazz music) (crowd cheering)