- I don't even like normal
candy canes.
- It freaks me out
how people have them
on their Christmas tree.
Why are you decorating
your tree with sweets?
- Yeah, I cover my tree in
the Christmas dinner though.
(laughing)
(soft music)
- Yeah, when you hear weird
on this channel,
it's never,
never good.
- "Dog food flavor candy cane."
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I'm gonna have raspberry strawberry.
I'm gonna have lime.
He's gonna have dog food and
- Fish.
- [Colin] What flavors did you
try last time?
- Oh, there was like a pork
candy cane.
Yeah.
And then there was like an
oyster candy cane.
Yeah, this is gonna be terrible.
Thanks for ruining my day again.
(soft music)
- No.
- Oh, wow, pickle.
- [Colin] Y'all like pickles?
- I love pickles.
I do, but I also love candy canes
but I don't like them together.
- I don't wanna say Pickle Rick
'cause it's played out
but he is on the box so
(sucking teeth)
- Oh my God, the pickle looks like
such a pervert.
(laughing)
- And the characters they have
in this are the most sinister.
- Why is he,
he's not happy that he's
holding a candy cane,
he's happy that we're
trying it,
because he knows what's
about to happen.
- Doesn't even look like a --
I've never seen a pickle
look like that.
- He's a pickle.
- And his hat is silly as well.
- You like look a bit like him.
- If he added me on --
- You're also dressed in green
and wearing a hat.
(laughing)
- That's true actually.
- Wait, we're having loads of fun now
but now we have to taste these
and remember that they
taste of bloody pickle.
- [Colin] Y'all like pickles?
- No!
- [Colin] Alright.
- Fuck me, man.
This is silly stuff now
we're getting into,
it's silly territory.
- This is so wrong.
This is so wrong.
- Now I've had the worst ones possible,
this isn't that bad.
- Well, it's tasty though,
I like it.
- No, it's not.
- I'm surprised.
(laughing)
- I would buy this and eat it.
I prefer this over
normal candy canes.
It's really good.
- I'm disgusted.
- If a burger,
they forgot the pickles,
bite of the burger,
lick this.
- No, actually,
you put it on the side
of the burger, okay,
so you're eating that and go --
(laughing)
(indistinct)
- You're playing the burger
like a flute.
(laughing)
- Well, I like my candy canes to be
sweet flavored and mint flavored
and, you know,
candy flavored.
Not like the inside
of a burger.
- No, this is an affront
on my taste buds.
Archie McPhee,
more like arch enemy.
- I'm not looking forward
to the rest of this
'cause as you said,
it's just downhill from here.
- Yeah.
This is as good as it gets.
(soft music)
- Ah, man.
- Jesus Christ,
what are you doing, people?
- These are even worse
'cause they're like
the color of
normal flavored candy canes.
- I think you'll love
the illustration on this side
of the box,
it's somebody just adding ketchup
to our candy cane.
- Again, great with a burger,
this and the pickle.
- Do you know what,
either side,
double team it.
(laughing)
- Look at the silly head on him.
Look at him.
Smirky little arrogant twat.
- Oh, it just really tastes
like ketchup.
- It's so ketchup-y.
- Smell's always the worst part.
You know,
just close your eyes and suck.
(laughing)
- That is nasty.
That is wrong,
it tastes like gone off ketchup.
- It's so accurate.
It's so accurate
and it's so bad.
(laughing)
- Oh my.
Oh, fuck off.
- It's like,
honestly like just pouring
a lot of the
red sauce into your mouth.
- But it's not good red sauce,
it's kind of sour.
- Yeah, like gone off red sauce.
- Yeah.
- I have to say I'm very impressed
at how accurate these flavors were
and if I ever made pasta
and was running low on sauce,
I could put this in a blender,
sprinkle it on top of the pasta,
and my guests would not
know the difference.
- Stop talking.
- I can safely say
from my experiences in life
that was the worst thing
I've ever put in my mouth.
- Wow.
- And you should have seen me
through my college days.
(laughing)
- Your brain tricks you
'cause you think, "Oh, sweets,"
and you just,
even though you know
what the flavor is and then
it's so wrong.
Like it's just,
it's so wrong that it's
not even right.
It's not wrong in the good way.
- They don't taste like ketchup.
They taste like the juice
at the end of a tin
of Spaghetti Hoops.
That's exactly what they
taste like.
- Yeah, like a very slight
baked bean,
that kind of --
- Awful.
- Worse than the pickle.
- If it was between this
and the pickle,
I'd eat the pickle.
- Oh man, that was nasty.
I don't see how we can
get more worse than this.
(soft music)
- Shiitake mushroom candy cane.
- Look at how depressed
this mushroom looks.
- Look at him.
Why does he,
why is the animation
like he's smoking a joint?
He has that kind of,
"I'm smoking a joint," face.
Look at his nose,
I'd rather eat the contents
of the inside of his nose
than eating another one of
these candy canes.
- All I could see is,
"Stay in school kids."
- [Laura] "Or you're gonna turn out
like me."
(laughing)
- "They'll put you in a candy cane, too."
(laughing)
- [Man] Y'all like shiitake mushrooms?
- I love shiitake mushrooms
but in a stir fry,
not in a candy cane.
- Slauncher.
- Oh no, that is, okay.
- Oh, stop, I haven't eaten it yet.
- Oh God.
(laughing)
- In your own time, Laura.
- Oh, Martin, no.
(exclaiming in disgust)
- Oh, man, no.
No, no, no, no,
- Oh, God.
Oh my God.
(laughing)
That is so --
(laughing)
(gagging)
- Oh.
Oh, God.
- Oh, Colin.
- [Colin] Yeah?
- It's not right.
- [Colin] Ah.
- I have to say, like,
I am from the bottom of my heart,
soul, everything,
so deeply impressed
at how accurate these are
and simultaneously,
in this case,
just fucking horrified.
- Smells like leather shoes
and someone wore it
with no socks on
for years.
- Yeah.
- And I'm about to put that
in my mouth.
- You bit it.
- You have to go for it fully.
- Good man, Jamie,
you're committing.
(gagging)
(groaning)
(coughing)
- Tastes so moldy
or something.
(gagging)
- When you say Archie McPhee
is a gag company,
do you mean that in so far
as a joke company
or a company that makes you
want to gag?
'Cause I think
the answer is both.
- We're having a conversation,
everything's fine.
- I've never made this much
eye contact while sucking something.
- I have.
(laughing)
Okay.
- Oh, we have met before.
(laughing)
(soft music)
- What have we got?
It's green, it's not apple.
I'd say --
- Pho?
- What the pho?
(laughing)
- Have you had pho before?
- No.
- [Colin] Pho is a Vietnamese soup
consisting of broth,
rice noodles, herbs and meat.
Sometimes chicken.
- Big shiny eyes,
full of optimism,
full of joy.
This one doesn't look like
he's lived a long traumatic life
and has resorted to the pipe.
- Like a national
cultural dish of somewhere
and they've disrespected it
by turning it into a candy cane.
Imagine the looks you'd get
if you're in Vietnam.
Eat pho and you went --
- "Oh, sorry, hang on,
no need for the chopsticks."
- Some more pho flavor
into these noodles.
- Did you ever see the end
of Hannibal Lecter?
- [Colin] Yeah.
- Where your man's
cuts his skull off,
but he's still talking,
he's eating from it.
- [Colin] That's pretty fucked up, dude.
- That's really fucked up man.
(laughing)
- I didn't design it.
- This is so much better.
- It's, you know,
it's alright.
- I could get down with this one.
- This is not bad.
- For sure.
- This just tastes like
a normal candy cane to me.
- It really does.
This one's so fine.
- Herby.
- Herby, yeah.
It's kind of refreshing.
- It's kinda like sour candy,
isn't it?
- Yeah, this is the most
candy-like candy cane we've
candy had.
- This one's so fine.
I'm actually so relieved.
This is how I want to be in the world.
I wanna show up
in the world like this
but those other ones,
they just,
it was like Jekyll and Hyde there.
Like, I just,
they just ruined me,
these are grand.
This is fine.
- It's not really a pho,
it's more of a friend.
You know what I mean?
(soft music)
- Bacon flavor.
Yes.
- No.
- Yes.
- No.
- Bacon flavored anything is good.
- Okay, it's bacon flavor.
- A second
pork based candy cane.
- [Colin] Y'all like bacon?
(laughing)
- Look at the pig.
It's like he's skipping
down the street.
He's living his best life.
- Like, that, you'd fool me.
- Yeah.
- I always feel slightly depressed
when my candy cane is broken.
It's like, oh.
- Yeah, I always feel slightly depressed
when the candy cane is
bacon flavored as well.
- This is the one that you
put into the bag
at the office party
just to really mess with everyone.
And then you're like,
keep your eagle eyes and try
and figure out who takes it.
And then you're just like --
(laughing maliciously)
- Ready?
- Enjoy.
- No.
- Yeah.
- It's so bacon-y.
It's so bacon-y.
- It's smoky.
- Yeah.
- It's not the worst.
- It's not the worst, it's strange.
- Yeah.
- It's subtle.
It's a bit more like
maple syrup than bacon.
- It's so bacon-y,
it tastes like a frying pan.
- It took a second to hit
and then it really,
there was like a layer of sugar
and then the sugar was gone,
it was just like, ooh, bacon.
- It, like, so sneaks up on you
'cause it does taste really sugary.
- It tastes like I'm having
a conversation with a smoker
outside the pub.
They're really up close
trying to tell me about their day
and just inhaled smoke in my face.
And I'm having some sweets
while he's talking to me.
(laughing)
- Just like,
you know the cigarette,
the candy cigarette?
- Yeah.
(laughing)
- Yeah, it's a shame you can't see
your kids anymore, mate.
(laughing)
Tell me about it.
- If I was to sneak up
behind you,
blindfold you and put this
into your mouth, like --
- Oh, God.
(laughing)
- Like you'd swear it was just
a normal candy cane.
And then you go, "Who's done that?"
Get away from me now before I call the cops."
- No, I wouldn't because it'd be
bacon flavored and I'd be like,
"That's definitely Patty Morphy,
the sick weirdo."
(laughing)
- Can I instruct you on how to --
- Okay, teach me,
teach me how to suck this candy cane.
All right, you guys ready with this?
- Ready, so put it in,
so it's like, slowly.
- Put it in slowly?
- Put it in slowly.
- Okay.
- Slowly, like,
one inch per second.
So like,
so now it tastes like candy.
Now pull it out slowly
and now it tastes like bacon.
It's like, in, candy, candy,
candy, candy, candy --
- Is anybody else seeing this?
- Bacon, bacon, bacon,
bacon, bacon --
- They're edible, you know?
- Yeah, we're not
getting sick here.
But that's not an endorsement,
you know?
That's the bare minimum
I'd expect.
- Yeah, I can actually,
I can put it in my mouth
and not feel regret.
- Shame, yeah.
- It's not often you can say that
with things you put in your mouth.
- Not often.
(laughing)
- [Colin] So guys, now that you've had
a selection of new weird candy canes,
whatcha think overall?
- It was a rollercoaster of emotions,
wasn't it?
- But now that I've got through that,
I feel like I can get through anything.
Like, yeah, exactly.
What did your burp
taste like there?
- Some bit of shiitake mushroom and bacon.
- And a candy cane can be beautiful
in and of itself.
Mix it with something else,
another beautiful thing
doesn't really work.
It was like seeing a pregnant woman
with a pint.
Two beautiful things
don't go together.
Keep them apart.
Call me old fashioned.
Well, I really enjoyed that video.
- Do you know what, I really did.
- And if you enjoyed it too,
why don't you hit the bell,
subscribe and leave a comment.
And hey,
maybe you'll see us sucking
again sometime.
- I know some of yous already have.