He [Laughing]
I think this is like an homage to Julius caesar? Its a little much.
but I'm here for it.
Hi! I'm Nicole Byer you know me from Nailed It
and today I'm gonna go through some Instagrams.
[music]
Okay.
So the first one is of me
I am making a face and can I curse on this?
So the caption say's
Oh hi, hello, can you please tell your friends
to watch the first and second session of nailed it.
I'm making this face because this is the worse thing I ever had in my mouth
and I've had a lot of nasty sh*t in there
XOXO gossip girl.
I ate a cup cake that was filled with salt,
instead of sugar and it was truly a wild ride and
it was not fun.
so then we have
Oh!
Antoni, Antoni from queer eye,
Oh yes
You have his sexy face and then you have that big ol' juicy burger
and it says im Canadian but that doesn't mean I don't appericate a good
summer American staple like a good burger.
I don't think a burger is an American staple.
I think a burger is a burger and I think they have them in Canada.
but you know Antoni you do you boo, boo.
Antoni honestly is just a
very, very good looking man,
and I got to sit next to him for like, hours and it was nice.
I felt my Pu*ssy juicing.
Any who, so then we have
[Laughing]
Ayesha curry, who is posed with some ribs.
Honestly if you asked me I don't think she ate these ribs, I think this picture is a lie.
Like, her fingers aren't dirty, there's no sauce on her face, she is posed for the gods.
I appreciate it. I think its great, I would eat at her restaurant.
but I don't think I'd see her eating there.
I think she eats like alot of salad she's got a good body.
Oh!
Then we have Chrissy Teigen, she is
[laughs]
[inaudible]
So I think she already made a salad
and her hands are like this over the bowl
but theres nothing in her hands so she's not
dropping anything in the bowl.
I like bodies, I love seeing somebody's body.
So I appreciate that she's showing that sh*t off.
I guess I would choose Ayesha Curry's kitchen over Chrissy Teigin
because
Ayesha curry has like a business and serves people
and Chrissy Teigin is just cooking for John legend and her babies.
Now we have Oprah, this is a lie, this says, this makes me so happy just picked.
- You didn't pick this. I dont think Oprah has picked up anything in 32 years.
Like, I think Oprah is just living and people are bringing her things,
Also this basket is so big!
There's so much vegetables in here.
Theres no way she's eating all of this because we all know she loves bread.
Oh, Beyonce. Oh yea Beyonce.
Oh my gosh she's so beautiful. She's a magical mystical treat.
I got to meet her one day, it was just magical.
She smells.
I can't even tell you what fragrance it is.
It, It's magic, this magic its in your nose and you're like,
someone
someone is near who's a unicorn
and then she apppears and your like yea that's the unicorn person.
Theres no caption because there's none needed.
What is this girl?
Usually I'm all for Beyonce's posts. But she posted an avocado toast of sorts.
So it looks like a hard ass English muffin,
a bunch of avocado, some little Ragoopty doo's and then leaves.
It says 44 days til Cochella, vegan time!
Click the link in my bio to join me.
Um Uh
Beyonce, I don't know about that one.
This is everything!
this is so f*cking cute, I love Cardi B.
I think she's dope, she's also a unicorn
I have yet to meet her though, but I'm sure she smells amazing as well.
I think this is such a cute little take on a unicorn cake
that was made super unique and super cute!
My favorite Cardi line is you don't have to support me, I got bras for that
or I have a enough bras
you don't have to support me.
It's a good line,
you don't have to support everything I'm doing
because i'm wearing a good bra.
My titties are basically at my chest.
I just like that song.
I like it like that.
[Singing] Oh, baby.
I like It like that [Laughing]
[Laughing]
I really like that song.
[Laughing]
Um, Like not enough to learn the melody at all.
[Laughing]
Ow!
I like him.
Okay.
Big Dipper, he's a rapper, he's a very body positive person.
He's wearing a shirt of a fat little muscled man.
and he's showing off margaritas and nachos
and it was his birthday.
and its a perfect picture cause look how happy he looks.
I love fat people when they're smiling around food
because its like they're genuinely in their happy place.
and like you can't dispute it.
I love food.
Yes!
Alissa Edward,
[Laughing]
be a Fruit Loop in a world full of Cheerios.
which is just funny because what the f*ck does that mean?
I guess she's saying Cheerios is like a basic cereal,
but it's not!
its pretty nutritious and that's what children learn to eat with
so, like, cheerios are very useful for the world.
but I get it be loud, be wild be free.
I would say, be a Frosted Flake in a land of special K's
Okay, Oh this Is fun,
[sighs]
honestly it seems like to much work,
like who's doing all of this?
people are just eating it.
-why is? I guess I shouldn't say its bad
because thats my living.
right now, is, people recreating extravagantant cakes.
keep making them, keep making these cakes.
Thank you for watching insta-stalk on Elle,
You can catch me on netflix, on the show Nailed It.
And you know what, if you like this video
you better subscribe, you better like it,
you better post it on your facebook while you say, hey friends I have content for you
And thats it.
We're at the end.
I did it, I'm perfect
Goodbye!