[YMS] World War Z was kind of a crappy movie.
And I'm sure that not everybody agrees with that statement, but there was a point in time
when anybody who knew about the movie pretty much expected it to be a piece of shit.
It seems as though the overwhelming production issues that
this film suffered went unnoticed by the average viewer.
But to me they were pretty fucking apparent.
I mean, sure, it's not the worst movie of all time, but the fact that
it's so bland and unspecial just makes it that much more boring.
It would be easier to sit through if the whole
movie was as bad as the worst parts of this movie,
because if you're not scared by the zombies, this
movie doesn't really have that much to offer.
Fear can be particularly subjective in movies and
some people get scared a lot more easily than others.
When your argument for what the movie did well stops at, "it was scary", then you might
want to change your wording from, "No, it was actually good", to, "I really liked it."
The biggest problem with this movie is that a vast majority of it is so incredibly uninspired.
I envy people that can get sucked into a movie they've already
seen a million times in different forms, but that's just not me.
I'm aware that there's quite a few people who can watch this overdone and cliché news footage
intro and get sucked into the movie, but to me it's like I'm not even watching anything.
It's been done so many times that I might as well
just be sitting at home and imagining it instead.
I don't understand how I'm supposed to be absorbing information if none of it is new information.
You just showed me three minutes of nothing.
What's interesting to note about this movie, is that the script had a fuckton of rewrites.
Not only was it based off of a novel where Brad Pitt's character doesn't even exist, but between
2008 and the movie's well delayed release, it went through about five different people.
And about a month before the film's release the writer of the original book
came out and said that the only thing they wound up keeping was the title.
After he actually watched to movie he found out that they did keep one character, but that's about it.
[YMS] So the reason why this film went through so many rewrites
is because the original ending apparently kind of sucked.
[Interviewer] World War Z is currently going through reshoots at the moment.
[Brad Pitt] Yeah, out here again.
What's the nature of those?
Well, it's just a big monster of a film and umm, that one has
*got* to work and there's certain, umm, how do I describe it...
It's just gotta work a certain way, and we gotta, we gotta fix'em up and that's all.
We get it right and it's gonna be great. It's not... it's not unusual.
[clip] In Moscow, Brad at the premiere of World War Z - said to open tomorrow - tells "USA Today" that
when he saw the first cut of the film he had his doubts, saying he thought it was, quote: "atrocious".
[YMS] Paramount was seriously considering scrapping the project altogether,
before last-minute investor David Ellison threw more money at it.
And then Brad Pitt was reportedly so pissed that he stopped talking to the director.
"Vulture" claims that several production sources said
that they were only communicating through intermediaries.
So, if the director had notes for a scene, instead of talking to Brad Pitt directly,
he talked to someone else and then that person would tell him what he said.
Brad Pitt and Marc Forster deny that this happened, so believe whatever side you want.
[Marc Forster] It was just *fantastic* to work with him.
He's one of the most gifted, iconic actors.
[YMS] But it would be hard to believe that Brad Pitt wasn't at least
a little pissed at Marc Forster for how he handled this movie.
[clip] Brad's huge zombie bet was met with troubled production,
budget overages and incomplete and endless reshoots.
[YMS] That, and there's an obvious financial benefit
in pretending there weren't any production issues.
I mean, by the time the movie was released, Brad Pitt put in a lot of
effort into making sure everybody knew it had his seal of approval.
[Brad Pitt] I've seen it 30-40 times through the editing process and I
*love* it man, I'm re-really thrilled by it, people are having so much fun!
It's the most intense thing you're gonna see all summer, it's so fun.
[YMS] When I first watched this movie I didn't know about all the production drama.
But as I was watching Brad Pitt in this scene, I
thought to myself that he looks weirdly unhappy.
Does nobody else think that he looks kind of unintentionally pissed off in this scene?
Is it a coincidence that this scene was part of the reshoots?
Maybe it's all in my head but I don't think I'm the
only one that thinks he looks off in this scene.
Just saiyan.
If there's one thing that really sticks out about scripts that get rewritten over and
over by different people, is that a lot of time it really loses its sense of flow.
Like, holy crap is this movie ever impatient.
They literally spend two minutes pretending to develop these
characters before they're thrown into the zombie outbreak scene.
And that's perfectly OK if you want to get straight into the action.
But if you're going to have a character development scene anyway, could you not try even
a little bit to make it seem as though you're not just checking off items on a list?
Show that he has a wife and children, and that he is happy with them so
that the audience can relate to him without him having any real character.
Show foreboding zombie footage on the television.
Mention this child's inhaler that will be needed later in the movie.
[clip] Did you pack your inhaler?
[YMS] Force in a line that references his old job.
[clip] Martial law is like house rules, but for everybody.
Were you ever in places like that with your old job?
[YMS] Show the counting toy that will be used later.
[cilp] -Look who I found! -[Here comes the number 12 train.]
[YMS] "OK we're good, next scene!"
From the moment they show up in the kitchen to the start
of the zombie outbreak scene is 77-fucking seconds.
"No you don't get it, we don't have to develop anything 'cause we've
already shown that they're the typical American family unit."
"That's just the Hollywood secret!"
They spent 20 million dollars for these rewrites, guys.
Oh, hey! It's that really cool font that I've never seen before
that shows up one letter at a time making this exact noise!
[obscure computer sounds]
So, now we're in bumper-to-bumper traffic and weird things start happening.
Why is the helicopter flying around?
Why is the police officer so rude?
Why is there an explosion?
Everything is getting fucked up and nobody knows what's going on.
[clip] Get back in your car right now! Remain with your ve... [BANG]
[YMS] Excuse me? So, this is the first piece of action that happens
in this movie and already it's a little difficult to take seriously.
Apparently, the first six collisions this dumb truck
made before hitting this guy were completely silent.
[BANG]
Unless it fit in between these vehicles?
"I am scared!" "I am also scared!"
They decide they're going to follow down the path it's
created, but both of their lines are very clearly overdubbed.
[clip] -What are we doing? -That's our way out of here.
[YMS] I also like how the line, "That's our way out of here",
comes directly before several "Capital One" product placements.
They're driving around in the chaos and this little girl just won't shut up.
[clip] I want my blanket!
Baby, it's packed right now. Snuggle with Subway Sam, okay?
My blanket!
-Rach? -Rachel, baby, you've got to get back in your seat.
-Baby, we need you in your seat. -Put you belt on!
-Rachel, right now! -Gerry? -Rach, get your belt back on!
[YMS] "Yeah, get your seatbelt on or else I'll stop paying attention to the road."
So, Brad Pitt collects his children and notices something about a motorhome.
But for the life of me I cannot tell what the fuck even happened.
It's obvious this part only exists so they can have a convenient escape
from the danger, but I'm so fucking confused as to what happened here.
So, the RV just stops right here and the driver gets out and leaves his keys.
And then he just fucking disappears. For some reason this guy was pointing his gun at him.
And then they just drove away for no fucking reason.
Were you trying to steal his RV and then you changed your mind?
The best interpretation I can come up with is
that this guy died as he was exiting his vehicle
and somebody in the editing room forgot to add a muzzle flash and gunshot sound effect.
I mean, this extra acted as though there was a gunshot.
But in the scene we don't see or hear a gunshot at all,
making it really fucking confusing as to what just happened.
I guess just either way it's just one big convenient coincidence for our main character.
So, this little girl drops her stuffed animal, and Brad Pitt
decides to pick it up and then observe a zombie transformation.
And it's from this that he learns how long it takes for a person to turn into a zombie.
[nine, ten]
Like, how loud is that toy that you can hear it through a crowd of screaming people?
Seems like the type of thing that would be pulled off the
market for permanently damaging little babies' eardrums.
"Good thing we were the only people out of dozens of witnesses that decided to take
this RV. Quickly! Everybody run this way, this looks like our way out of here."
[clip] I use my Capital One Venture Card with double
miles you can actually use to fly any airline, any time.
[YMS] So, as if the score for the film wasn't already
recycled enough, they decide to end the scene with this noise.
[dramatic BRRAAA]
[YMS] I guess that's just one more to add to the pile.
[BRRAAWWWMMM]
[BRRAAAMMM]
[BBBRRRRMMMM]
[BRRWM]
[BRRAAW]
[BAAAM]
[BBRRAAAWAWA]
[BRRAAA]
[YMS] "Oh no, the child's asthma that we briefly mentioned less than ten minutes
ago is causing her some troubles, I guess we gotta go to the pharmacy now."
Man, if there weren't any children in this story then these instant
conflict plot devices might have required some writing effort.
[clip] My blanket!
[YMS] So he gets the meds while his wife gets some food,
I like how this guy hasn't clued in that he should go home yet.
It's a good thing she's a child or else everybody would notice the horrible acting.
"aaaahhh"
Is it really too much to ask that children get cast for their acting abilities?
Do they even audition anymore or do they just show their face?
"Adam, that's unfair criticism, and your standards for realism in film are unreasonable."
"Children aren't supposed to be in the movie to act,
they're supposed to be in the movie as a cheap way to
influence plot devices, and also to serve as props as
a cheap way to make the main character relatable."
"That's just the Hollywood secret!"
[clip] Here at Hollywood Studios we've been conscious of what successful
films have not only been made, but have stood the test of time.
After many decades of research, we have realized that part of
the process of making a successful film is having a good story.
After many more years of research, we've discovered that audiences respond better to action
sequences if the characters in peril are ones we care about and want to survive.
We then organized a series of experiments with focus groups, and over
the next few years we were presented with some startling results.
Each participant in the study was shown a large rock to act as the main character.
By the end of the test we took a large sledgehammer and
smashed the rock into many pieces in front of them.
The idea was to see if the reactions were any different depending on what
was done to the rock before we introduced the expectation of death or loss.
What we found is that people are more responsive to the loss
of the rocks if we had given them stories, backgrounds,
personality traits, you know - anything we could attach onto
them to make them seem more human and less like a rock.
Now, unfortunately, we ran into a bit of a problem. See,
the time it took to develop and explain these traits to
the test subjects proved to be tiresome for both the
creators of these traits, and the participants involved.
Some even started asking questions about the rock, but we didn't want that.
Fast forward two years later and here at Hollywood
Studios, we came up with the perfect solution.
We found that we were able to get near identical results with our
participants after presenting the rock under special conditions.
After that point, the backstory wasn't even necessary in the slightest.
Turns out all we had to do was place a dainty, slimmer
rock next to it with one or two pebbles by its side.
The result was outstanding.
And let me tell you, I sat in for one of these sessions and they brought the
sledgehammer out after about, like, 30 seconds and they went hysterical.
This one woman, she started crying, "Please don't kill him, he's got a family!"
And then we smashed it.
[YMS] He saves his wife from getting mugged/raped and they make
it back to their... Oh, no they don't have a vehicle anymore.
They run to some apartment buildings and just barely make it inside.
"We're scared!"
Alright, so let me get this straight. When a child's stupidity conveniently
initiates a plot device we're supposed to accept it because children are stupid.
But you know what the number one thing is that children are constantly
doing that almost never fucking shows up in these types of lazy movies?
They cry. All the goddamn time.
And, for whatever reason, people are able to watch
movies wherein children are going through any number of
traumatizing events and no one ever gets taken out of the
movie by how held back a child's horrible performance is?
"No, you don't get it, everybody deals with stress
differently, it's just a coincidence that every child
character in Hollywood movies never seems to deal with
stress in a way that would require acting talent."
"If I've never seen a movie with decent child performances in it, that means
it's not possible and I should just accept it as a standard for today."
Oh hey, one of your idiot children disappeared from you; I guess you gotta go find her.
[clip] -Where's Connie? -Connie?
[YMS] It's a good thing she was randomly screaming in front of this door and
not the other ones, because these people are going to let them in. Yaay!
Also, good job on using the same take twice.
[clip] -Let me in! -Let me in!
[YMS] I bet you're exhausted, here have a beer.
He waits until later, when he knows a helicopter
will be waiting for him because of his old job.
He invites this family to come with him, but they say, "No",
and then they immediately regret it after they leave.
"Fuck!"
"Let me open this door and look around everywhere
except directly in front of myself. Oh, no!"
This kid miraculously escaped, I guess he can come too now.
So, as you can tell, I'm not all that impressed with the action scenes I'm presented with.
If I found myself being more easily scared by
these zombies then it might be a different story.
Perhaps it's the annoying children and their held
back screams that take me out of each scene.
[clip] -I'm scared. [YMS] -You say that.
Well, either way, it's time to break from the action
and deliver an incredibly boring story scene.
These guys insist that Brad Pitt has to help them look for a cure because of his
history at the UN, and he has to do it or else they kick his family off the boat.
[clip] You want to help your family. Let's figure out how we stop this.
[YMS] "This mission depends on you, Gerry, and
we can't do it without you. You being the man
who looks everywhere but in front of yourself
when entering a room with new potential threats."
Well, I guess he doesn't have to be around these annoying children anymore. They
just witnessed hundreds of people being murdered and they look incredibly bored.
"My parents are dead but I don't give a shit."
So, now he's off to South Korea with this guy who's supposed to be a valuable asset.
Supposedly that's where the first infection was. As soon
as they land they have to start fighting more zombies.
And it's set up in such a way where it's like, "Oh no, you can only
see the zombies as soon as they're super close because of the fog."
This guy freaks out and starts running back inside, fucking hilarious.
He died fucking instantly.
"Oh hey, look how far away I can see the zombies all of a sudden."
[clip] The guy just shot himself.
[YMS] He shot himself? Oh my God he actually did shoot himself.
[clip] -He was supposed to be our best hope. -Well, he's not our best hope anymore.
[crickets chirping]
[YMS] So, now he's here and it turns out he doesn't really get the information he wanted.
[clip] Now, our colonel said he was the first one.
-This colonel, is he around? -Oh, yeah. He's right here.
[canned laughter, applause]
[YMS] Fun fact about human biology: Your fingers contain bone and tendon, not muscle.
Clearly, burning them does not do that much if their ashy remains can exert energy.
They casually explain how the zombies went after
every single person in the room except this guy.
[clip] This prick stands right in the mix, while seven
or eight of them turn Zeke all at the same time.
But they got no time for Ol' Dirty Bastard here.
[YMS] And at no point does anyone think, "Hmm, maybe we shouldn't treat this as
an odd coincidence and we should figure out why they attacked everybody but him."
You flew all the way to South Korea for the explicit
purpose of gathering information to try and find a cure.
Is it not even worth looking into, or even asking him about it?
You don't want to, maybe, pull out your phone and write a note?
"Nah, that doesn't seem important so I'll just ask him something else."
[clip] The ones I saw bitten turned in 12 seconds. Same here?
-Five or 10 minutes. -Yeah, Davidson went and he turned in 10 minutes.
[YMS] Oh great! It's this scene.
[screaming]
[YMS] He figures that the best way to stop the infection is that
everybody pulls out their teeth so that they can't bite other people.
Alright, now I am completely baffled at how someone can watch this scene and
think, "Yeah, pulling out your teeth with your fingers, that makes sense."
Do people seriously have to try it themselves to
realize how impossible it would be to get a grip?
Check this shit out!
Nope! I'm really trying to get a grip, I'm seriously trying.
Nope! Nope! Here, I actually got one of these grips
that you use for opening jars, just to prove my point.
Nothing. There's not a single fucking tooth I can actually get a grip on.
I'm trying seriously hard, it doesn't fucking make any sense.
Are we supposed to assume that he smashed his face against the bars
a few times before trying but somehow didn't chip a single tooth?
Are we supposed to assume that he was just the one guy at Camp Humphreys
who already had the dental hygiene of a homeless man with no teeth?
Like, come on, at least use your shirt to grip it or something.
I don't understand how I'm supposed to take this seriously.
Also if you watched this in theatres instead of the unrated home video release,
they just start the scene with his remaining tooth digitally edited out.
And then a tooth magically appears in his hand in the middle of their conversation.
Man, have you noticed how all the best movies are made with
financial gain taking precedence over artistic integrity?
I mean, what's the point of even having a vision for the film if
you're not supposed to dismantle it to sell it to a younger crowd.
[clip] And for those who think the movie might not
be right for kids: Brad is letting parents decide.
His kids saw the movie, and his kids love zombies. You
know, he's leaving the PG-13 rating up to parents.
Subtitles by: Fresh D and Ron Zuckowski