- Hey guys!
So when I was a kid and my parents
told me I couldn't do something like
mixing all the cereal together
or stealing the neighbor's cat.
I always replied with, when I'm an adult
I'll do all of those things.
Also you're not my real mum.
She was my real mum but guess what?
I'm an adult now, say what?
So as a service to my childhood self,
I am gonna do some of the things
that my parents wouldn't let me do as a kid.
Except for stealing cats
because that's still a little bit illegal.
Let's go!
Mixing all my cereal together in the same bowl.
So whenever I went to ASDA with my mum
I'd be like, mum can we get all of the cereal.
I wanna put 'em all in the same bowl
and then make the ultimate cereal of destiny.
And she'd be like no, Phil, that's a waste of money.
Well, I disagree.
You can make cocktails,
why can't mix all the cereal together to make a cereal-tail?
So first thing I want some Lion cereal
which is cereal, obviously.
I mean caramel, chocolate and a little bit of angst.
Yas.
Next up we got some Golden Nugs.
It's basically just yellow balls of sugar.
Apparently they taste yee-haw
so how could this go wrong?
Also the serving suggestion is to just
put them on a trowel and shove 'em in your mouth
Which is my motto for a lot of things in life.
Get those Nugs in the bowl!
Next, the furry fandom's favorite cereal Frosties
with muscular tiger daddy. (laughing)
I can't say the phrase muscular tiger daddy on my channel.
Tony, forgot his name then
I always call him Freddy, Freddy the Tiger, sure.
That would make sense with Frosties.
Fros- Freddy the er f-f, shut up Phil.
(groovy hip-hop music)
And I finally got some Lucky Charms.
These are like £100 in the UK
so I got myself a little tub.
You know what the deal is,
sugary, marshmallow-y goodness blessed by an Irish person.
I need to get loads of marshmallows in there.
Yes.
I think little Phil was onto something.
I don't know why this would be a mistake.
Right, I need to mix 'em up,
I have washed my hands, don't worry.
Could I use this for some kind of cereal ASMR Instagram?
(sensual music)
Okay I think I got everything on one spoon.
Here we go!
(drum rolls)
Bottom's up!
Wait, why is my bottom up?
I need to think about that.
Okay, here we go!
(drum rolls)
Wow!
So much is happening in my mouth right now.
I think that is the sweetest thing
I've ever eaten but it is freakin' delicious!
There's like a bit of chocolaty-ness.
I think the main flavor coming through
is the Lucky Charms 'cause they're so potent
but generally, it just tastes like sugary heaven.
See, I thought the Lion cereal might be a mistake
but it's kind of elevating the whole thing.
(crunches cereal)
What would the name be?
Frosted Lucky Lion Nuggets.
(laughs) That does not sound good.
I do feel like I'm gonna go into a sugar-coma
but five stars from me.
Take that, Kath!
Photocopying my face.
Another thing I really wanted to do was scan
or photocopy my face.
I don't know what it was, maybe I saw it in a movie
but I just really wanted to put my face in photocopiers.
Whenever I saw one I was like I wanna photocopy my face.
But my dad would never let me do it to his photocopier
because he said I'd cover it in face-grease.
Thanks for calling your son greasy.
I also had a slight compulsion to photocopy
my bare ass but I won't be doing that
for your viewing pleasure today.
Maybe after I switch off the camera.
Whoa, this is a work-out!
My old printer broke, sounds broken,
but it still works as a scanner
so I thought I could scan my face.
Because that's what I wanted to do when I was a kid.
It's got my hoodie, it's eating me!
What is it doing?
Calm down!
No I didn't want that to happen!
I think this is like a literal laser
so I'm gonna close my eyes so I don't go blind.
No going back now.
I'm gonna move my face with the scanner.
Here we go, yeah.
Oh my God!
That is actually horrifying!
Imagine if that was on the wall in a horror film.
Right I think I need to press my face more into the scanner.
Right, here we go.
Close my eyes so I don't go blind.
(laughs) Looks like some kind of
medical experiment went wrong.
I said I wouldn't look at the lights
so I guess now I'm blind.
Also it kinda looks like I'm angrily making out with myself.
I'm gonna print those out and send 'em to a gallery.
(orchestral music)
Talking to strangers.
Obviously I wasn't allowed to talk to random strangers
because they might kill me but now I'm an adult
I can do it all the time
and I've got the magic of the internet
so I thought we could see who's out there.
So I'm going to go to Omegle.
What do you wanna talk about?
What were my interests when I was a kid?
Pokemon, food, that'll do.
Pokemon or food, oh Buffy!
Right, let's go!
Oh we both like food, hi, F.
They're typing F to pay their respects?
Oh, they're female, male.
Oh they've gone.
- [Man] Betrayal.
- Oh maybe they were a lesbian.
These are enthusiastic, hey!
(laughs) They just said food.
I just mixed all my cereal together in one bowl.
(crunches cereal)
And was it divine?
(laughs) Am I talking to myself in a different universe?
Or disgusting?
I was 10/10 divine, I ascended to heaven.
Please share the cereal.
Puts a spoon in your mouth.
Okay I've made it creepier than the stranger I'm sorry.
And then they disconnected, wow!
- [Man] Betrayal.
- Hi I'm female, 20 years old.
I'm so bored in my bed and I need someone to fun.
(laughs) So I'd be like d'you wanna play Spyro the Dragon?
Oh, she's gone.
I feel like she was a robot. (laughs)
Hope she finds someone to fun.
Now I'm seeing why my parents
wouldn't let me speak to strangers.
There must be someone nice out there.
Shove, okay!
That's enough of you, strangers are bad.
This was a bad idea.
Would we have better results with video?
Let's have a look.
Hi.
- Nah.
- (laughs) Hi, don't wanna know what was going on there.
Hi, that was a bathrobe.
Why does no one wanna be my friend?
(whirring noises)
That was a serial killer's basement.
I'm 100% sure of that.
Okay, that is not how to behave in public, Jeremy.
Hi, wanna be best friends?
Hey, I don't mind and it M here.
M too, what shall we do for our first activity?
Aw, nothing bro just wish you success
and luck brother, take care.
That is the wholesomeness I needed!
There we go, faith restored in strangers!
Watch an 18 rated movie.
I was always obsessed with watching a movie
that was 18 rated.
Obviously my parents didn't let me
because they were responsible adults
but the one that they would never let me watch
was A Nightmare on Elm Street,
about Freddy Krueger with knife hands
that attacked people in their dreams
but in all my life I've never seen it
because my parents were like this is a cursed video.
So I'm gonna watch the first death scene
and see if it would have been suitable for young Phil.
I might have to censor this because I heard
it's quite gruesome.
Oh God!
(woman screaming)
She's not having a good time.
(woman screaming)
This is a lot more gruesome than I thought it was gonna be.
Oh, she's floating around the room!
The boyfriend doesn't seem to care.
What is turning the lamp on gonna do Bobby?
(woman screaming)
He just got yeeted into the wall.
She's going up the wall now!
Yeah, I would not have liked this as a child at all.
He's just stood in the corner going Gina.
Call the police, dude!
Jesus!
(horror music)
That was so much more horrific
than I thought it was gonna be.
Okay parents, I'll give you that one.
Make fizzy milk.
So when I was a kid when Soda Streams came out
I was obsessed with the idea of having fizzy milk
'cause I love a glass of milk.
What if it was fizzy?
When I floated this concept on Twitter,
you guys said, here's a concept, delete this,
milk left the group chat. (laughs)
Here's a concept, no, no, please no, blocked.
But ever since I was a kid I wanted
to investigate this possibility
so I got myself a Soda Stream.
I feel like this is gonna be a bad idea
because on the back it literally says,
to prevent personal injury only carbonate water.
So I am risking my life for this experiment
but I think I need to do it for science.
(groovy music)
Now I don't think milk is gonna carbonate at all.
So I might have to add a little bit of water in.
Like a watery milkshake.
I'm scared this is gonna end up with milk all over my legs!
There we go!
Know the person that invented fire,
the person who invented chocolate.
This is a significant human event
that I'm sure someone else has probably done on YouTube.
Here we go!
(Soda Stream bubbles)
Oh, it's bubbling.
It's doing it!
You can press it three times for a light fizz
but I'm gonna go five time for full fizz.
Oh no, we've got some leakage!
I'm trying not to get milk all over myself.
I'm scared.
(machine hissing)
Oh God!
(laughs) I thought it was gonna explode.
Jeez, why is Soda Stream so violent?
Oh, I'm getting milk on my legs!
Put the lid on, give it a little bit of a shake.
(tropical music)
We'll know if it works if it makes a fizz noise now.
(bottle fizzes)
Oh, it did a little bit!
Cheers, have I made a big mistake?
Is this gonna be horrible?
Place your bets now!
Okay, I'm gonna do a big gulp!
(drum rolls)
Oh no!
No, ugh!
Ugh, oh, it's horrible!
It's horrible!
Oh, it's like, it's got the
sparkling-ness of sparkling water
but then the milk taste is really sour now.
I don't know what it's done to the milk
but it tastes disgusting!
Ew, no!
No, I betrayed nature, one star.
Would not recommend.
I need to put something in my mouth
that is not milk, I'm gonna eat some Frosties.
Hm, now that combination actually,
that's not so bad!
Now I feel a bit sick, erm, moral of the story,
don't fizz things that aren't meant to be fizzed.
So there we go, I think that's enough for today
and if you enjoyed this give me a thumbs up
and I'm sure I could do some more of these in the future.
Also, let me know in the comments below
what childhood things you wanted to do
but were never allowed to!
And I will see you very soon
unless I die from eating fizzy milk.
Goodbye!
(upbeat jazz music)