- In this video, I will share with you three ways
on how the world is influencing us,
as women, to behave low-value
and live a sad life by sugar-coating it
and making it look glamorous.
(uplifting music)
Hello, my name is Greta Bereisaite.
I'm a dating and relationship coach for women.
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how the world is influencing us to be low-value,
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So without further ado, I wanted to discuss
these few topics with you.
So the number one topic that I would like
to address is that we are really influenced,
nowadays, to believe that we are the same,
that men and women are not different,
therefore what's happening nowadays,
men are really influenced by dating coaches
and relationship coaches, and just people in general,
and by the world, by social media and et cetera,
to play hard-to-get with women,
that believe that a man should not be pursuing a woman,
spreading really, really fast,
and a lot of women are suffering from it,
because in order for a woman to feel safety
and security, in order for a woman's love needs
to be fulfilled, she needs to feel strong pursuit
from a man.
In the Bible, it says it's a man that finds his wife,
therefore it's a man that should be pursuing a woman,
or even if you're non-religious
and you believe in science,
or if you look at just the nature,
can see that men need to pursue women based
on their hormones, based on their testosterone levels.
Men really appreciate things that we need to work hard for.
Men are naturally goal-focused,
we are naturally goal-oriented.
Because of their hormones, men are naturally bigger hunters
than women are.
They are strong pursuers because
of their hormonal levels to achieve things in life.
As women, on the other hand,
we don't have these type of testosterone levels.
We are more relationship-focused.
We are more emotional.
We are not pursuit-oriented.
Actually, pursuing and chasing makes us feel vulnerable,
makes us feel insecure.
We look for a man that gives us safety
and security, not makes us feel insecure.
On top of that, if we look at the animal kingdom,
we can clearly see that it's a male pursuing a female,
a bird dancing for a female bird.
This is how the nature is designed,
for people to live happy and fulfilling lives.
Anyway, because of a lot of wrong advice given nowadays,
men and women are stuck with each other
because we are not fulfilling each other's love needs.
When you don't fulfill each other's love needs,
the relationship cannot move forward.
So we are stuck with each other,
by not fulfilling each other's love needs,
by playing games and complaining about each other,
yet we still want one another because
we were designed, initially, for two to become one.
Number two outside influence that I see a lot,
nowadays, just terrible, terrible advice,
and it does not work, is telling people to be vulnerable.
When I hear this advice, it literally hurts my soul.
Because how can you influence people be vulnerable
with each other and wear their hearts on a sleeve,
when you live in this world where you have wars going on,
where you have people taking advantage of each other,
where you have people manipulating one another,
where you have people hurting one another?
Why would you influence somebody
to be vulnerable and wear their hearts on a sleeve?
So you would stay naive and the other people could use
you more and manipulate you more
and play more games with you?
Not only this, even in the relationships,
yes, ideally we should be with somebody
that we can fully trust, and when you're married,
hopefully you're with a guy that you can fully trust,
who will always be there for you.
That's the kind of whole intention behind it.
Saying this, we, as humans, we are all broken.
Nobody is perfect.
You will never find that perfect wife
and you will never find that perfect husband,
because it does not exist.
The world has evil.
The world has good.
The world is broken.
It's a constant power in this world
between good and evil.
There are no perfect human beings here.
Only God is perfect.
So when you are influenced that your boyfriend
or your husband or your friends
or your family members to wear your heart
on the sleeve and to be vulnerable,
keep it in mind that you are not sharing
these vulnerabilities with someone who is perfect.
You are sharing your secrets and your vulnerabilities
with someone who is also damaged,
and even if that person seems like the most gentle
and the most loving person,
that person could easily turn around,
couple years later, and share all your secrets,
share all your vulnerabilities with others,
or use and manipulate you on that.
Ladies, please be smart.
If you have vulnerabilities, if you have insecurities,
which we all do, as we are not perfect human beings,
work on them, and in the meantime, guard your heart.
Be smart, 'cause this place that
we are living in is not perfect.
Number three tip that really annoys me nowadays,
and by the way, everything I'm sharing with you, ladies,
I've been in this trap myself for a number
and number of years, create your own rules.
You're the creator of your own life.
You're the creator of your own rules.
Rules are meant to be broken.
Enjoy the moment.
Live it to the fullest.
You only have one life.
Ladies, when you have this type of mindset,
that rules were created because
they're meant to be broken
and that you only have one life,
the focus of this type of mindset is you.
Everything is about you and for yourself.
This type of mindset realigns with another type of saying,
which is, put yourself first.
These two go hand-in-hand,
as putting yourself first is all about you, you, you,
and your own needs, as well.
This is a very dangerous mindset to follow,
as by following this type of mindset,
you are slowly coaching yourself
by practicing it and by following habits
of this type of mindset,
to become a very selfish, self-obsessed person.
Then you become self-obsessed
by doing self-love affirmations,
putting yourself first, creating your own life,
creating your own rules, gradually,
slowly, even if your intention wasn't this before,
you stop caring about others less and less and less,
and you slowly start to get more
and more obsessed towards yourself.
Ladies, when in life you become selfish
and everything is about you and your own world,
start damaging your relationship with others.
You start damaging your relationship with your guy,
as you're just becoming super selfish.
You start damaging your relationship with others.
You start hurting others,
as you don't care about these people anymore,
so your relationships become broken.
Over time, these broken relationships we drop off,
and a lot of times, people that follow
this type of mindset,
they eventually end up living by themselves.
I think this is where the saying, it's lonely on top,
came from, because people that are very successful,
they usually, they keep putting themselves first.
They keep putting their business first,
towards everything that we do,
and where the faster business grow,
more you have to do, the more you have to work,
and people around you, they just see
that you don't have time for themselves anymore,
'cause it's all about just you, your life,
your world, your business,
and step-by-step, slowly, you do end up being by yourself,
all your own world, that all your own rules,
that all your own selfish gains,
all that materialistic things,
originally maybe was your ultimate goal,
but now you're lonely on top, all by yourself.
My advice, ladies, would be don't create
your own rules, don't create your own life.
Don't separate yourself out.
The rules are already created,
the rules of living a meaningful life are already there.
You just need to open yourself up for them.
Don't put yourself first, in front of others,
so you're not becoming a selfish person.
Don't put yourself behind others
so people are not taking you for granted.
Love others as you love yourself.
Focus on living a balanced life.
Focus on following the truth.
Focus on following the rules that are already there
for you to follow, in order to live a happy
and balanced life.
So, ladies, these are my thoughts
on how the world and society is influencing
us to live a low-value and actually sad life,
by making it sound glamorous and sugar-coating it.
Please be wary and please don't fall
into this trap, as it will not lead
you anywhere good or healthy.
So if you liked this video, please press Like.
Let me know in the comments, people, what did you think?
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and thank you for watching.
Kisses from Dorset. (Greta blows kiss)