>>> WELCOME BACK, OUR NEXT GUEST IS TRYING TO SPREAD A MESSAGE OF
ACCEPTANCE AND RESPECT THAT’S
VERY PERSONAL TO HER.
>> JODY PATTERSON SAYS EIGHT
YEARS AGO HER WORLD CHANGED WHEN
SHE LEARNED HER SON IS
TRANSGENDER.
TRANSGENDER. >> I’M JODY PATTERSON, I’M A MOM
OF FIVE.
OF FIVE. WE LIVE IN BROOKLYN.
WE JUST MOVED TO BED STUY, WE’RE
JUST LIKE A REGULAR FAMILY.
>> IN 2015 AUTHOR AND ACTIVIST
JODY PATTERSON MADE NEWS WHEN
SHE REVEALED TO THE WORLD IN A
VIDEO THAT ONE OF HER KIDS IS
TRANSGENDER.
TRANSGENDER. >> THAT’S PENELOPE WHO’S 7.
>> I’M 8.
>> I’M 8. >> MY THIRD CHILD, WE ASSUMED A
GIRL, PERFECTLY ANATOMICALLY
PERFECT GIRL.
PERFECT GIRL. REALLY EARLY ON THERE WERE SIGNS
THAT PANEL WAS VERY DIFFERENT.
EVERY TIME WE WOULD TRY TO PUT
CLOTHING ON HIM, THERE WAS AN
INTENSE REACTION TO HIS BODY.
ONE DAY I REMEMBER PULLING
PENELOPE ASIDE, WHAT’S REALLY
WRONG, BABY?
WRONG, BABY? WHY ARE YOU SO UPSET?
AND PENELOPE SAID BECAUSE
EVERYONE THINKS I’M A GIRL.
I DON’T FEEL LIKE A BOY, I AM A
BOY.
BOY. THAT SENTENCE WAS REALLY HARD
BECAUSE YOU DON’T -- I WAS LIKE
ILL EQUIPPED.
ILL EQUIPPED. >> FACING A NEW REALITY, JODY
WORRIED ABOUT HOW SHE WAS GOING
TO PROTECT PENELOPE.
>> THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT OF
WAS THE WORLD.
I WENT SO FAR WIDE, LIKE WHO IS
GOING TO UNDERSTAND PENELOPE THE
WAY I DO.
WAY I DO. WHO’S GOING TO LOVE PENELOPE THE
WAY I DO.
WAY I DO. >> Reporter: BUT SINCE THAT
VIDEO, JODY SAYS SHE’S CHANGED
HER PERSPECTIVE ON LIFE.
>> I EXPANDED MY FRIEND GROUP.
I SHIFT THE WAY I DO BUSINESS.
I SUPPORT BUSINESSES THAT ARE
TRANS FRIENDLY, LGBT SUPPORTIVE.
>> AND PASSING THAT PERSPECTIVE
ONTO HER KIDS.
>> EVERYONE CAN SAY WHAT IS ON
THEIR MIND, WHETHER IT’S GENDER
OR POLITICS OR RELIGION OR WHO
GETS THE FRONT SEAT IN THE CAR.
EVERYTHING IS ALLOWED.
THE ONLY RULES ARE YOU CAN’T
INTERRUPT, AND YOU CAN’T REACT.
YOU JUST HAVE TO TALK YOUR
TRUTH.
TRUTH. >> JODY TELLS HER FAMILY’S STORY
IN "THE BOLD WORLD" A MEMOIR OF
A FAMILY AND TRANSFORMATION.
JODY, THANKS FOR BEING HERE.
WE REALLY APPRECIATE THIS.
WHEN I WAS LISTENING TO THIS,
YOU KNOW, YOU SAID YOUR FIRST
THOUGHT WAS HOW’S THE WORLD
GOING TO REACT TO PENELOPE.
BUT DID YOU HAVE TO CHANGE THAT
THINKING AND FIRST OF ALL, FOCUS
ON PENEL?
ON PENEL? >> THE FIRST THOUGHT THAT WENT
THROUGH MY MIND WAS HOW I FAILED
MY CHILD.
MY CHILD. I THOUGHT THAT I HAD FAILED TO
RAISE A PROUD GIRL, FAILED TO
RAISE A FEMINIST.
MY FAMILY DEVELOPED PRIDE IN ALL
OF MY SISTERS, AND SO I REALLY
SANK.
SANK. USUALLY MOMS AND WOMEN, WE HAVE
A WAY FORWARD, WE HAVE A PATH,
AND IN THAT MOMENT I HAD NO
ANSWERS FOR PENELOPE, SO I
REALLY SANK.
REALLY SANK. >> SO YOU BLAMED YOURSELF.
>> I BLAMED MYSELF AND I SAT ON
THAT GUILT FOR ABOUT A YEAR.
AT THE END OF THE YEAR, I
COULDN’T DO ANYTHING ELSE BUT GO
HOME TO MY MOM IN THE SOUTH.
I WENT BACK DOWN SOUTH TO TRY TO
PUT THE PIECES BACK TOGETHER AND
PUT IT IN PERSPECTIVE.
>> YOU SAID DOWN SOUTH.
THERE ARE A LOT OF FOLKS THAT
WILL SAY AT 3 YEARS OLD, YOU SAY
HUH-UH.
HUH-UH. IF YOU DON’T WANT TO PUT ON A
DRESS THAT’S FINE, BUT YOU ARE
GIRL, AND THEY WILL SAY HE’S 3,
HE’S TOO YOUNG.
WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO THAT?
>> I DID THAT FOR THE FIRST
SEVERAL YEARS OF HIS LIFE.
I INSISTED.
I INSISTED. I CAME VERY DIRECT WITH HOW THIS
FAMILY SHOULD OPERATE.
I PUT DRESSES ON.
I STUCK TO MY PERSPECTIVE.
I INSISTED THAT PENELOPE BE A
SMART, HAPPY GIRL, AND PENELOPE
REJECTED THAT, REFUSED THAT.
CRIED.
CRIED. EVERY NIGHT WE HAD TEMPER
TANTRUMS
TANTRUMS TANTRUMS, NAIL BITING UNTIL THE
NAILS WERE BLOODY.
THE ATTEMPT TO MAKE PENELOPE SEE
HIMSELF AS A GIRL FAILED
MISERABLY.
MISERABLY. HE BECAME A SAD AND DARK CHILD.
>> SO WHEN DID THE TRANSITION
HAPPEN?
HAPPEN? WHEN YOU FINALLY ACCEPTED THIS?
>> MY TRANSITION?
THAT’S INTERESTING BECAUSE A LOT
OF PEOPLE THINK OF THIS AS A
TRANSITION OF A CHILD, BUT THIS
WAS MY TRANSITION.
PENELOPE ESSENTIALLY IS THE SAME
PERSON.
PERSON. WHEN I WENT BACK HOME TO THE
SOUTH, I LOOKED AT THE PEOPLE IN
MY FAMILY WHO CAME BEFORE ME, MY
GRANDMOTHER, DR. BLACKWELL A
CIVIL RIGHTS ACTIVIST, MY UNCLE
WHO WROTE THE REVOLUTION WILL
NOT BE TELEVISED.
THESE ARE PEOPLE THAT HAVE
CHANGED AMERICA FOR THE BETTER,
AND I LOOKED AT THEM, AND I
THOUGHT THEY’RE ACTIVISTS.
CIVIL RIGHTS LEADERS,
REVOLUTIONARIES.
REVOLUTIONARIES. PENELOPE IS A REVOLUTIONARY.
HE GOES WITH WHAT’S INSIDE OF
HIM, AND HE’S GOING TO MAKE
AMERICA BETTER, AND THEN I
THOUGHT I’M THE SAME THING.
SO I HAD THIS CHANGE OF THOUGHT
THAT IF WE DON’T GO BY STATUS
QUO, IT’S OKAY.
SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO COURSE
CORRECT, AND PENELOPE WAS HERE
TO COURSE CORRECT MY THOUGHTS ON
WHAT IT MEANS TO BE ALIVE.
>> HOW DID YOUR FAMILY REACT?
>> SO WE NEVER LOST LOVE.
EVERYONE STAYED FOCUSED ON LOVE.
MANY OF US HAD A HARD TIME
COMING UP WITH THE WORD
TRANSGENDER.
TRANSGENDER. IT’S A TOUGH WORD.
SOME OF US STILL DON’T USE IT,
BUT YOU KNOW, I HAVE FAMILY FROM
AFRICA, FROM GHANA, I HAVE
FAMILY FROM THE SOUTH.
I HAVE FAMILY FROM CANADA, FROM
SWITZERLAND, THE MAIN THING AND
WHEN YOU GET TO THIS POINT WHERE
YOU’RE LOSING YOUR CHILD, THE
CRITICAL THOUGHT IS HOW DO WE
STAY ALIVE.
STAY ALIVE. HOW DO WE KEEP PENELOPE ALIVE?
IF WE LOSE ONE KID, THE WHOLE
FAMILY HAS FAILED, SO WE
REALLY -- THE BOTTOM LINE WAS
HOW DO WE LIVE.
>> HAVE YOU ASKED PENELOPE
WHETHER HE WANTS TO CHANGE HIS
NAME?
NAME? >> YES, THAT WAS A BIG THING.
A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK I HAVE
KEPT THE NAME.
PENELOPE INSISTS ON KEEPING HIS
NAME.
NAME. HE WAS NAMED AFTER HIS
GRANDMOTHER.
GRANDMOTHER. I SAID DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE
YOUR NAME TO A NAME THAT’S MORE
BOYISH, A LITTLE NAIVE FOR MY
PART.
PART. HE LOOKS AT ME AND SAID, WHY I
LOVE MY GRANDMOTHER, I’LL KEEP
THAT NAME UNLESS YOU WANT TO
CALL ME JACK.
HE DOESN’T SEE HIS NAME AS
ANYTHING OTHER THAN LOVE.
>> HOW OLD IS HE NOW?
>> HE’S 11.
>> HOW IS IT AT SCHOOL AND?
>> IT’S TOUGH.
YOU HAVE TO BE BOLD.
THIS IS ABOUT STEPPING OUT IN
YOUR BEST PLACE, AND SO PENELOPE
WALKS INTO SCHOOL EVERY DAY IN
PANTS AND A TIE, AND HIS FRIENDS
SAID THAT’S COOL.
SOME FRIENDS SAID GIRLS DON’T
WEAR TIES.
WEAR TIES. EVENTUALLY THEY CAME AROUND
BECAUSE PENELOPE KEPT INSISTING.
THIS IS NOT SOMETHING THAT
HAPPENS ONE TIME.
THE FIRST TIME PENELOPE WANTED
TO WEAR PANTS I SAID PUT ON A
DRESS.
DRESS. WE’RE TALKING YEARS OF
CONSISTENT BEHAVIOR.
CONSISTENT BEHAVIOR. IF EVERY TIME HE SHOWED UP THAT
WAY HIS FRIENDS EVENTUALLY SAID,
YEAH, LET’S JUST GO PLAY SOME
GAMES.
GAMES. LET’S GO DO THE MATH.
THEY DON’T WANT TO ARGUE OVER
GENDER.
GENDER. THEY JUST WANT TO HAVE A GOOD
TIME TOGETHER.
TIME TOGETHER. >> WHAT DO YOU SAY TO FAMILIES
THAT ARE GOING THROUGH THIS
RIGHT NOW?
RIGHT NOW? >> I MEAN, I WROTE THIS BOOK FOR
PARENTS WHO ARE STRUGGLING TO
UNDERSTAND, AND MOST OF US WANT
TO DO BETTER FOR OUR CHILDREN,
AND SO THERE ARE THE LITTLE
THINGS THAT YOU HAVE TO PAY
ATTENTION TO.
ATTENTION TO. WHEN I THOUGHT PENELOPE WAS
BEING REBELLIOUS.
BEING REBELLIOUS. PENELOPE WAS ACTUALLY EXPRESSING
HIMSELF BEFORE HE HAD WORDS, SO
I SAY PAY ATTENTION TO THE
LITTLE THINGS.
LITTLE THINGS. CONNECT YOURSELF TO PEOPLE WHO
HAVE COME BEFORE YOU TO
FIGHTERS, TO FOLKS THAT HAVE
CHANGED AMERICA.
CHANGED AMERICA. IF YOU DON’T HAVE ANY, YOU CAN
BORROW SOME OF MINE IN MY BOOK,
SOME OF MY RELATIVES, BUT THINK
ABOUT HOW WE’VE DONE THIS BEFORE
IN AMERICA, HOW WE’VE MOVED OUT
OF NOTHING AND COME UP TO
SOMETHING.
SOMETHING. I JUST TELL PARENTS TO BE BOLD
AND TO BE BRAVE AND SUPPORT YOUR
CHILDREN, LOVE AND LIFE ARE
LITERALLY THE ONLY THING THAT
MATTER.
MATTER. >> YEAH, WELL, THANKS AGAIN FOR
SHARING THIS.