Congratulations on the week, the Finding Dory week.
First of all I'm excited about the movie, but
secondly that you would call me, I've done this show many times, but
you would think of me on this special week to be a guest.
>> Mm-hm. >> I thought my God, this is, I just felt,
I was so moved.
>> [LAUGH] >> And
I wanted to do something special because you're-
I said, I always go empty-handed, and you're always giving guests things and
audience things.
I want to give you something.
What do you buy for Ellen?
What do you get?
So I went to the, they have this Worldwide Web.
>> [LAUGH] >> And I got on it.
And I said, cuz I had no ideas.
So I said, I put woman.
Cuz you're a woman.
And I said, friend.
And I said, what do you want for a female friend?
You want health, and you want safety.
And this is not a joke.
This is what came in this box.
>> When you said woman friend?
>> I said woman, friend, health, and this is what came.
You pull it out.
Pull it out.
That's what, that's what.
>> [LAUGH] >> Now let me show you.
I know what you're thinking.
It's not just a brassiere.
And you've given me underwear.
>> Yes. >> So this is fitting.
>> What do you mean it's not just a brassiere?
>> [LAUGH] >> Okay, say you're with a friend and
you're walking in the sand on the beach, or in the desert, and wind,
there's a sandstorm.
What do you need in a sandstorm?
It's an emergency right.
>> Yeah.
>> [LAUGH] >> So this is, this is an emergency.
I don't know what camera.
What camera should I point at so you can see?
Four? Or you.
Look at that. Can you see that?
It's the emergency.
Let me. It's the emergency bra.
It's an emergency, so if there was a sandstorm and you couldn't breathe.
Or there was really bad, exhaust.
Look, if your friend, you first put on yours.
>> [LAUGH] >> And then, try it.
But you gotta put it like in the plane, put yours on first.
And then your friend.
I'm your friend.
>> So you can only have one friend with you.
>> Well, see so we both, put it on, put it on.
And that's it.
>> [LAUGH] >> And we can just-
>> [APPLAUSE]
>> This is fun.
>> Yeah okay.
Just be safe, I love you and-
>> Thank you so much.
>> Well.
>> Thank you. >> It's Finding Dory week,
you gotta do something special.
>> I'm gonna leave it on so if someone comes in late, they don't have any idea.
>> Well don't be mad at me like, what did he do?
>> Yeah, they'll just be like-
>> He unclipped her.
>> Yeah. >> [LAUGH]
>> From here it's like I'm dating again.
One hand.
>> It is really clever because you can hook it from the back or the front.
>> Safety first.
Thank you.
There's an instruction manual.
>> I'll bring this home.
>> Well, where else would you leave that?
>> Well, I for sure would not leave it here.
>> Right. >> Yeah.
>> [LAUGH]
>> There's no way.
>> But-
>> Anyway, congratulations on the movie.
>> Thank you so much.
>> You're wonderful.
How do you do the voice?
How do you do that voice?
>> It's really hard it's just me yeah.
>> [LAUGH]
>> See well you do voices.
See I don't when I went in.
>> Well you're using an s.
>> Yes.
>> There's no s in what I do.
You know people think I do voices because when I was, well I'll tell you something,
when I was 11 years old, I was at a birthday party and
I was choking on a piece of cake.
This is a true story and
it went halfway down- >> They're laughing at you choking on
a piece of cake.
>> [LAUGH] >> That's not funny.
>> I know it's not but they're laughing at you-
>> No, so watch your children, this is not funny, it was halfway down my throat and
I couldn't breathe and the air was constricted.
Kinda like when you have a balloon and you pull the the nipple of the balloon, and
it makes that high, so I'm going, help me!
>> [LAUGH] >> That's the sound that, help me!
And everybody, they would laughing.
I'm dying, you don't laugh.
>> [LAUGH] >> But it got dislodged, and I lived.
And I thought to myself, my God, everybody at the party was looking at me and
laughing.
If I could just bring myself this close to death each and every night.
>> Uh-huh.
>> I could be an entertainer.
So like an idiot, I practiced in my room.
I got good at it,
I got real good at it with just the muscles in my throat, no cake.
Don't try that at home.
And I went to school and in the back of the class and my friend go, help me.
And he would laugh, the teacher would catch me go, Howie Mandel
if you have something funny to say, you stand up and you tell the whole class.
I remember thinking, she's right.
Why perform for one person?
So like an idiot I would stand up and I would go help me!
And she'd go out in the hall and I'd go yes!
Why play the small rooms when they could play the halls?
>> [LAUGH] >> The cafeteria and
one day maybe the Ellen Show.
So this is like a dream come true.
And then I went out to California and I started using that.
I made voices.
Muppet Babies was my first.
I was Skeeter on the Muppet Babies.
And Skeeter is Scooter's little sister.
Now you talk like that.
And then I did, but that's Bobby.
It's the same voice.
This is, I did Bobby's World on Fox through the 90s.
I was a little character called Bobby.
That's Bobby.
>> And Bobby sounded like- >> So-
>> [APPLAUSE]
>> It's the same voice.
>> [LAUGH] >> Bobby's is, and then I did Skeeter,
which is the same voice, and then the Gremlin movies, remember Gizmo?
The first little, that's Skeeter.
So Skeeter, Skeeter said.
And the person in that control room is going what's he gonna mention?
>> [LAUGH] >> I wanna tell, yes, so but anyway,
and this is I'm him, I'm Gizmo, and I would go.
[INAUDIBLE] Same voice!
So this is Skeeter, Bobby, Gizmo.
>> [LAUGH] >> It's all one voice.
>> Wow.
>> [APPLAUSE] >> I did have a-
>> That's amazing!
>> I could lower it.
This is, I never use this on television or film but I could lower it so
it sounds like I was in a terrible helium accident.
And I would go to the emergency rooms of hospitals
to the admitting desk with a helium voice.
This was before, nobody would recognize me.
I'd go to the admitting nurse and I'd go excuse me, can I please speak to a doctor?
And she'd look at me like that.
She'd go what's the problem.
I'd go, what do you mean what's the problem?
I was at a birthday party.
I wasn't the only one doing this.
Everybody was doing this.
>> Wow!
>> We had the helium balloons.
They took the helium balloons.
They sucked in the helium.
Everybody went hoo hoo ha ha, listen to me, not funny.
Everybody's voice went back to normal within like a minute,
maybe a minute and a half.
This is like two, two and a half weeks ago.
I am starting to get concerned.
So that's what I would do.
>> Does that hurt to do that?
>> No this hurts, right now, talking like this.
I can actually, this is my voice and when I get hoarse, your voice and
your throat hurts.
Doing this I'm not using my voice.
When I have laryngitis, this is how I talk.
>> [LAUGH] >> Wow.
>> It's really clear, cuz it's just the air.
It's just the air like a balloon.
>> It's hilarious. >> [LAUGH]
>> All right, we have to take a break
but that voice.
I know you're a grandpa now, so I want to hear how those kids react to that.
>> They love me.
>> I bet they do.