- Happy holidays, everybody.
Welcome to story time.
I'm Pear.
- I'm Orange
- And today, we'll be reading a Christmas classic,
"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."
You excited for this one, Orange?
- You bet!
The story of Rudolph has always been near and "deer"
to my heart.
(Orange laughs)
- Ugh!
- Ah, don't be like that.
You and I both know that joke absolutely "sleighed."
(orange laughing)
- Ugh, listen, dude, it's time to quit with the jokes.
Because I have a very important question I want to ask you.
You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen,
Comet and Cupid, and Donner and Blitzen.
But, do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?
- [Orange] Of course!
♪ Rudolph, the super-rude reindeer ♪
♪ Was the rudest deer of all ♪
- [Pear] What?
♪ If you did ever cross him ♪
♪ He would rudely dis you mom ♪
- [Pear] That's not how it goes.
♪ All of the other reindeer ♪
♪ Were afraid of his red, red nose ♪
♪ 'Cause it had weaponized powers ♪
♪ If he was mad, he would unload ♪
(record scratching)
- [Pear] That's enough!
Orange, you're ruining this holiday classic.
- I believe you meant to say,
"Enhancing this holiday classic."
(Orange laughs)
- No!
Now, we're gonna do this again.
And you're gonna sing it right, this time.
Got it?
His name is not Rudolph because he's rude.
Understand?
- Okay, fine.
- Good.
So, Orange, I'll ask you again.
Do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?
- [Orange] Heck, yeah, I do.
♪ Rudolph the red-nosed rain gear ♪
♪ Was waterproof and kept things dry ♪
(record scratching)
- [Pear] He is a reindeer!
Not rain gear!
- Oh!
Yeah, that makes way more sense.
Why the heck would a rain coat have nostrils?
Nobody "nose."
(Orange laughs)
- We're doing it again!
And this time, you're gonna do it right!
Got it?!
- Honestly, who "nose?"
(Orange laughs)
(Pear screams)
- Orange!
Do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?
- [Orange] You bet your buttons, I do.
♪ Rudolph the shed-clothes reindeer ♪
♪ Shed his clothes and ran 'round nude ♪
♪ If you were unsuspecting ♪
♪ He'd make sure you barfed your food ♪
(record scratching)
- [Pear] That is enough!
Orange, this is ridiculous!
Rudolph is not some nudist deer,
who goes around flashing people!
- Are you sure?
Isn't one of Santa's reindeer named Flasher?
- That's Dasher!
And you know it!
A nudist reindeer doesn't even make any sense.
- Of course it makes sense.
If there wasn't a deer running around completely naked,
then why do they call it "buck" naked?
(Orange laughs)
- Oh my gosh, dude!
- Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a story to finish.
♪ All of the other reindeer ♪
♪ Chose to wear their winter coats ♪
♪ They fear the next time Rudolph ♪
♪ Would appear and then disrobe ♪
♪ Then one foggy Christmas Eve ♪
♪ Santa came to say ♪
♪ Rudolph with your coat tied tight ♪
♪ Won't you flash the way tonight ♪
♪ So Rudolph, he got to flash him ♪
♪ 'Til someone called the P.D. ♪
♪ Rudolph the shed-clothes reindeer ♪
♪ Went down for indecency ♪
- [Pear] Ugh, I guess we'll see you next time.
Assuming story time doesn't get shut down
by the censors before then.
- [Orange] The end!
(Orange laughs)
- [Pear] Oh, that's so gross, dude!
(upbeat holiday music)