Good evening, everyone. Thank you so much for being here.
The people in here and everyone watching at home.
My name is Tucker and I am from New York City.
The title of my piece is Caleb's Confession.
I wrote this piece at the height of discussion and media attention around the opioid crisis
in the Northeast, especially in my community.
I go to a boarding school in western Massachusetts and in the towns surrounding mine and the
greater community, heroin use is unfortunately very common and claims lives on a daily basis.
There isn't much that has been done about it, so this song was sort of initially my
anger and response to that, trying to call attention to the issue.
In addition to being sort of socially active, I was also raised going to church every Sunday.
While I deeply value the lessons I learned in church, I am currently in the process of understanding
and evaluating my relationship with God, where my faith lies in how strong it is.
I thought it would be powerful to look through the crisis through the lens of religion, addressing
the question, if God is good, why does he allow evil to exist?
This is the protagonist's, Pastor Caleb's, dilemma.
His love for God is so great, yet
He is watching his congregation fall to the opioid epidemic.
In the context of a larger musical,
I picture this as the quintessential "I want" song, where we discover the protagonists
history, his struggles and ambitions.
Finally, I would like to thank the NEA, the American Theatre Wing,
and everyone who was involved, as well as Patrick and Shakina and Jamie
and all the members of these bands for making this happen.
This has been an amazing experience.
Here is "Caleb's Confession."
APPLAUSE
He says he cares, but he only cares at Sunday blessing.
He's not there when times get tough, and all his children are distressing.
Doped up blood in all they vessels, Heroin in sterile needles, Feel me, lord Jesus, I
feel the presence of the devil.
It's time for a New Dawn!
Don't wait for us to call on!
You're s'posed be our shepherd be the one we can rely on!
Prove those prophets wrong and send your son back for the respawn!
We'll crank the volume up and bump another one for Zion!
Cruise on through and choose a holiday to die on!
Cry until we find him resurrected from the dead?
The Messiah!
Listen to that shit that boy was lyin'!
If Jesus conquered death then why he having people dying?
God, God above, I'm so full of faith and endless love, but I can't believe these atrocities.
I've seen more death than I'm s'posed to have.
Why, oh why?
In the name of faith to a God on high do we Feel your wrath do we let them die?
Oh I'm losing this fight with the devil.
Watch out.
Her head drops back and she's foaming out the mouth.
Her arms spread out she drops the needle on the couch her little boy picks it and pricks
his wrist on the needle, ouch.
Red lights come flashing up the street, Only it ain't an ambulance it's the police.
Bloody sheets, her heart beat's creepin' out her teeth oh sweet Jesus I plead you'll see
it read it and weep for me.
But body blood and alcohol, Forget about the world and have yourself a ball.
Excuse my intrusion but I accuse you of a murder if you'd heard her confess you'd offer
blessings ain't that the protocol?
No, she's still dying.
The needle and syringe ain't healed with handcuffs and jailtime.
Forgive me lord I never meant to say your name in vain but Goddamn!
I'm feeling kinda skeptical ‘bout the divine!
Little by little belittle all these noncommittals.
Kill all the sicker suckers seeking drugging.
Oh mother!
All these downers taking you farther from your endower.
Powerful figures at play I pray you see the light through the high.
So where you gone mate?
Don't you know not all the world is pink and rosey eh?
Long as his mama kept the bottle and the opiates, the only thing that he'll ever know is to
utopiate.
When I was a kid, I was told if I listened to the law of the lord, I'd be free of all
sin.
So why was mommy crying when she came out from the car with a needle in her arm, and
a scar on her upper lip?
Why'd you leave Caleb staring at her from the door, too afraid to get closer, 'cause
he couldn't recognize her anymore?
Why'd you tempt little Caleb's broken heart with a start on the path of addiction?
what was that for?
She'd been praying saintly and every day until lately a state of sedation was the only way
she could feel safety.
So little Caleb saw it and wanted to follow mommy to her little heaven and the clouds.
Look what he found, look at that frown, look at him ruffle his brow.
Look at him now.
God, God above, You're so full of grace and endless love.
But I can't believe these atrocities.
How much more death do you want to see?
Why, oh why?
In the name of faith to a God on high, do we feel your wrath? Do we let them
die?
Oh I might as well pray to the devil.
Might as well pray to the devil
I might as well I might as well
might as well pray to the devil
I might as well
Might as well pray to the devil (repeated)
he says he cares, but he only cares at Sunday blessing.
He's not there when times get tough, When all his children are distressing.
Doped up blood in all they vessels Heroin, unsterile needles Feel me lord Jesus I beg
you save me from this devil.
[APPLAUSE]