If a girl was spoiled by her dad
in childhood or even into adulthood
and she could do no wrong in his eyes
she's learned
that's what to expect
from all other men.
And even if she wasn't spoiled rotten
if she's put her daddy on a pedestal
then she's going to look down
on all other men.
This is what happened to Paul
let's look at his story.
Paul writes,
I've been watching your red flags videos
why didn't I find them a long time ago?
There were a lot of red flags
like making me feel like I owed her something
for spending time with me and my family.
Actually you know what?
It was nearly all of them.
I never shook my head so much
watching a TV screen.
I'm sure lots of you can relate.
Most of the red flags
you highlighted in that video
well that was her.
But there were more
and I think
maybe you could add
a video with some of these extras
for other men.
You got it.
By the way, if you want to share your story,
if you want me to do a video
write your stories
and experiences in the comments below
the YouTube video on YouTube.
Well, let's get back to Paul.
So, we're going to start by looking at his story
then I’m going to share with you
the number one thing you should be looking for
in a woman who's emotionally damaged
with "good daddy issues"
and why you can never satisfy her
and the advice I gave to Paul for what to do next.
Welcome to just the tip.
So, Paul writes,
I've been in a relationship
for the past seven years,
which I've recently decided to get out of.
Thank you for initiating the breakup
you'll see why.
One, she constantly compared me to her ex
or her girlfriend's boyfriend's.
When her best friend
and her best friend's boyfriend
went to Greece for a holiday
I got all kinds of crap about that.
How I do nothing for her,
how we don't go anywhere,
how he's so good to her
because he takes her places.
It's not that I've done nothing for her
just last year I took her to France
and a year before I took her to Italy
and before this whole pandemic thing
we went to Australia and Paris.
But as soon as she sees
one of her friends doing something
it's immediately thrown onto me.
Okay, how many of you out there
watching this already want to shake this woman?
Yeah, raise your hand I do too.
Wait, it gets worse.
Okay, he continues
it wasn't easy
hostile reactions from her
made it very difficult to know
when she was going to blow up.
Because one of her girlfriend's boyfriends
was doing something she wanted to do.
Plus she's a schoolteacher
so when she wanted to take time off work
I couldn't.
Because sometimes
during school holidays
I'd be traveling for work myself
she'd tell me off if it was a holiday
and I had to actually work somewhere else.
(Sighs Deeply)
Right, I know.
Comparing to exes happened all the time.
My boyfriend did this and that.
She was always comparing and I felt like
I had so much to live up to
because these guys were so much better than me
at least in her mind.
If that wasn't bad enough
she constantly
compared me to her father
who was obviously better than me
in her eyes.
She has this thing with her dad,
she's constantly on the phone with him.
She'd say things like
my father wouldn't do that,
my father wouldn't say that.
Argh.
Most of the time it was about money.
My father always pays
he's so generous,
you're not a generous person at all.
I know, I know.
If you feel for this guy
let me know let him know in the comments
he knows this video is coming out.
So, this brings us to the next point number three,
she would always call me not generous
in order to increase my efforts.
I felt like I was working so hard
to get her approval.
She had a massive bill arrive one time
and she was crying that she couldn't afford it.
So, I paid for her,
didn't even get a thank you.
Not only did I not get a thank you,
I didn't even think about asking for a thank you
and then she says this,
don't think I’m saying thank you
you're not a generous person if you think that.
(Sighs)
Let us all breathe,
let us all breathe
for the pain of Paul
and many others who've experienced this kind of
narcissistic woman with daddy issues.
He continues
so I always ended up putting my hands in my pockets
to avoid an outburst
or her anger
or being compared to.
As I write this
I think geez, I put up with a lot.
Yes, he did yes you did.
It's good that you ended it.
He goes on to say
uhh,
this really touched me
not in that way come on pervy pervs.
Let's get with a story this is a touching story
but not that kind of touching story.
Okay, he goes on to say
it was really mentally draining
and I have to say
I'm a bit insecure now because of it all.
God!
Man my heart goes out to you
and anybody else who's gone through this.
So, he continues saying he doesn't know if
he wants to date again
or if he should take a break.
He says I feel like I just need to take at least a year off
to get my life back together.
He says he lost himself in that relationship
that is so common.
He says he lost touch with his friends,
he lost touch with the things he liked doing, his hobbies,
he basically lost touch with himself
because he invested everything in her
because if he didn't
he was called totally selfish.
If that's not projecting
I don't know what is.
Okay, so Paul's question
and then the number one thing you've got to watch for
for an emotionally unhealthy woman
who's got "good daddy issues."
He asks should I just be alone
and take some time out
to mentally regroup
and put myself back together?
My answer yes,
yes, yes, yes
more on that in a minute.
He goes on to say
I hear some people say
to go out and date
get to know new people,
get to know new women,
to get my mind off of her.
But he's not in a pickup
and he's not into meeting women at bars.
He's not really into dating sites
so should he get out there?
Should he get into someone else
to get over this last one?
Now, while that might seem
like a good idea
it's actually not.
Because if you're still in pain,
heartbreak, and it's really raw
all that's going to do is amplify your pain.
Because the next one who just gives it up quickly
isn't going to be satisfying
in the way that you think
it was satisfying and intimate and close
and meaningful
with the woman you were actually in love with
and then you're just going to feel worse
that that's what's available.
So, later when you can deal
that might be a good idea
but initially it's not a good distraction.
I'll tell you what a great distraction is in just a second.
And he goes on to say that dating isn't something
that comes naturally to him.
In his past relationships
it was always the woman who approached him
because he was afraid of rejection.
We've got a solution for that
coming up and why that's a terrible idea.
He says this really,
this really made me want to cry.
He says so it's probably because of that,
which is why he ended up
in an abusive relationship
with a narcissistic woman
because of who I am
he says and I say no.
It's not because of who you are,
it's because of who she is
and who you think you are
and you're not being truthful with yourself.
But he says I'd rather be me than a sleazeball
and I’m like yes,
I approve this message.
And he says I’m a bit wounded from this
and I just don't want to jump
out of the fire and into the frying pan.
I agree
it's not the right time
confidence is low
let's find a solution for that.
But first the number one thing
you've got to look for in a woman with unhealthy
"good daddy issues"
versus healthy good daddy issues
and I actually mentioned it
right at the beginning of this video.
If she was spoiled rotten as a child
and could do no wrong in her daddy's eyes
then she thinks she's the prize
and no man
no matter how amazing
is going to be able to meet her
unrealistically high expectations.
She views her daddy
with rose-colored glasses.
So, it's not even that he's so much better.
She's got an illusion
a disillusion
that he's perfect,
which of course, we know nobody's perfect
especially since he spoiled her.
And again, if she still puts him on a pedestal, her dad
then she's going to look down on everybody else
including you
unless she's emotionally healthy
and views her dad as a good man
not her superman.
If she appreciates
your good qualities
and celebrates them
and doesn't compare you
especially your flaws
to her image of a perfect dad
that's a good sign.
Watch for sincere,
genuine appreciation
for the good qualities you have
and a zero comparison
of the bad qualities you have.
We all have flaws to her dad
or exes or girlfriend's boyfriends.
A woman who's got a good dad
but is actually emotionally healthy
knows she's got a good dad
but she also knows he's not perfect.
He's not perfect she knows she's not perfect
and she knows you're not perfect
because she knows nobody's perfect
and that's okay.
What should Paul do?
He should definitely
focus on getting his life back together,
he should not date right away,
he should reach out to friends that he neglected
and apologize for that neglect.
He should get back into his hobbies,
he should start a new hobby
he's always wanted to but has been afraid to.
He should focus on whatever he slacked on
during his time in the relationship
focusing on the
spoiled princess.
He should focus on him
not women
until he feels
he can be confident enough
to choose wisely,
to be able to throw back the throwbacks,
to be able to approach women,
and do the filtering and selecting himself.
Now, if you've been in this situation
you probably know that's a tall order
where to start.
Well, if you want to reclaim your confidence and self-esteem
before you get back out in the dating market
then you definitely want to start
with my video on tiny habits
that make a huge difference
and if you want a more comprehensive
step-by-step guide
on what to do first and what to do next
that's meaningful for you
then you need to get my WakeUp2luv program
and do all the homework.
There's a lot of homework it's intense,
it's deep, it's introspective,
it's homework at home
and in the real world
but it's going to be transformative
if you do all the work.
Because by the time you finish
you will have higher self-esteem,
you will have higher self-worth,
you will be on your way
to selecting and filtering
high-value women
with confidence and ease.
And best of all, you will quickly ditch
the troublemakers and heartbreakers
because you will have fixed
or you'll be working on fixing
what caused you
to accept that kind of behavior
from narcissistic abusive women in the first place
and then you'll wonder what you ever saw
in a spoiled princess like this chick.
Because nothing changes
if nothing changes.
Nothing changes
if you don't make any changes in your life.
So, if you're ready to
transform your love life and your life
then get my WakeUp2LuV program today.
Big hug to Paul
positive comments for Paul
please don't trash him
he's suffered enough.
Thanks for being here, God bless.
(Music)