Ah, breakups!
They’re part of life and many of us may have gone through them.
Sometimes we’re even the ones who initiate it and at other times we’re on the receiving
end of it.
Although, not a fun thing to go through, people breakup for all kinds of reasons.
Perhaps, you fell out of love, maybe you fell for someone else, or maybe you just want some
time for yourself.
Some people break it off over the phone, some do it face to face, and with the popularity
of online dating people often break if off over text nowadays.
As a matter of fact, in a survey of 500 Americans, 57% of them admitted to have broken up with
someone over a text message.
Doesn’t mean it’s the right way though, most would say it’s rude or insensitive
to breakup over a text message.
Which brings us to the topic of today’s video.
We’re gonna help you out when it comes to breaking up with someone in the digital age.
Starting at number 3 on our list...
Be Less Engaging
Think back to the beginning of you’re relationship with your partner, remember how you couldn’t
go a day without texting them?
Yeah?
Now do the opposite.
What we mean is, when they text you, don’t respond to them for a few hours.
If you are having a conversation, try to respond a little slower than you normally would.
This will help to send a clear message to your partner that your interest in them is
slowly dying out.
This could be extra helpful if you’re in a relationship that started too quickly.
Unfortunately, now the flames of passion are burning out and you don’t want to feel trapped.
This soft signal will help your partner understand and gradually accept the fact that you want
a one-way ticket to single town.
Speaking of soft signals, here’s point number two:
Send Shorter Texts
Relationship Coach Claudia Cox states that, "If you are feeling suffocated in a relationship
then sending short texts can send a big message."
In most relationships, we often send each other long texts that show how interested
we are in each other.
We say things that we would not share with other people.
We do so because we have found a sense of intimacy with the person we love.
We want to form a deeper bond with them.
So, when you want out of the relationship, but might not want to say it to their face
right away, you can start by shortening your texts.
When your partner asks you about your day instead of sending regular replies like, "Hey
there babe, my day was awesome.
How was your day?"
You can say, "It was okay."
This is where you end the text and wait to see if they have anything else to say.
If they do, try to answer in just one to three words.
This is an obvious signal that you are slowly drifting away from them.
If you add this to the previous point, then those signals will be even more clear.
When you shorten your texts and become less engaging, they may be able to understand the
message that you’re losing interest.
Just keep in mind, sometimes people may send short texts for other reasons.
It might be because of a busy day at work.
The person you are dating might not be feeling well and just wants to rest for sometime and
take the day off.
They may have run out of topics to have a conversation on or maybe they just don't want
to say anything.
So, we recommend that you use your discretion when it comes to short texts and please don’t
assume that someone is sending you soft signals for a breakup.
And from here, we head to our last “soft Signal”
Text Other People
When you’re in a relationship, your partner may be the center of your world.
When that happens, you could find it difficult to exist without them.
You text each other more frequently and you become extensions of each other.
Whether it is 03:00 PM or 03:00 AM, you want them around all the time.
Then something happens, the honeymoon phase is over and you no longer feel the same.
So, what do you do?
You can start texting other people.
This is the final nail in the coffin, after this the message is pretty clear that you
HAVE LOST INTEREST.
They’ll probably get the hint the moment they see this pattern of behaviour along with
the previous two we have mentioned earlier.
They will understand that as harsh as it may be, but you have fallen out of love with them.
Now, you cannot continue and it is suffocating you.
You don't want to cause any conflict or chaos, which is why you’re doing this discreetly
instead of causing drama.
For this you can text many other people, you can text the new person you saw in the office.
You can text your best friend who you did not connect with in years, or maybe your friends
from high school.
It can be anyone, as long as it is combined with the previous steps we mentioned.
The purpose is to send soft signals before you finally decide to ring the final bell
or in this case, send them the dreaded break up text.
Just remember one thing though, try not to keep your partner in the dark.
It is very important that they know you are looking for an exit in this relationship.
These soft signals will help you tell them without hurting or infuriating them.
Breakups are hard, especially if people are not rational about it.
A lot of people may not take it too well.
The situation can get horrible pretty quickly and breakups can often lead to fights.
However, it is also important to know that your partner doesn’t deserve to be left
hanging.
Just like you, they have a life too.
You never know, they might be looking for a way out too and it is better if these issues
are addressed face to face, instead of a text message.
Have you ever broken up with someone through a text message?
Have you received a break up text message?
Let us know in the comment section below, we would love to hear from you.