how to speak to people better
communication skills hello and welcome
to videojug
I'm Rebecca fencing and I'm a life coach
being a great communicator is important
in all areas of our life whether we're
talking to our partners our friends or
our work colleagues being able to
inspire other individuals through your
communication or allow you to have a
more fruitful and enriching life here
are my top tips to being a good
communicator tip 1 use open-ended
questions in order to get a
communication going it's really useful
to use open-ended questions open-ended
questions often start with words such as
what when how and why an example of an
open-ended question is so what do you
like doing in your spare time I love
cinema theater and sports it's best to
avoid what we call closed questions an
example of a closed question is do you
like films yes I do
a closed question kills the conversation
because it can only be answered with a
yes or no answer
therefore using these open-ended
questions will ensure that the
conversation continues to flow tip 2
active listening this is a really useful
technique as it tells the other person
that you've really listened to what
they've been saying and also more
importantly that you've understood the
hours are quite long the works really
repetitive my boss doesn't appreciate me
if you've been listening actively at
this point you should now be able to
summarize what the individual has just
told you it sounds like you don't really
satisfied a new job anymore tip 3 the
cocoon sometimes when people are talking
to us we find it hard to concentrate on
what they're saying it might be that
there's lots of background noise or our
mind is elsewhere in
order to help you with this visualize a
cocoon around the two of you this will
allow you to focus in on every word that
they're saying to you tip four engage
with the other person if someone is
trying to engage you in conversation
your body language is really important
Tom I need your advice uh-huh
don't continue with the tasks that
you're already doing
don't shout the answer over your
shoulder Tom Tom I need your advice
sorry instead what you need to do is
stop what you're doing turn around and
face that individual and give them the
time they deserve Tom I need your advice
of course what is it
good communication style is when you
really engage with the other individual
tip five don't make assumptions don't
jump to conclusions when you're having a
conversation with someone don't assume
you know what they're thinking or
feeling about a particular topic I
assumed you'd be alright with that
instead it is much better to ask them if
they're okay with this if they feel
alright about that you're really then
taking into consideration that person's
thoughts and beliefs rather than
projecting your own thoughts or feelings
on them tip six avoid antagonistic
sentences an example of an antagonistic
sentence is you're sitting in my chair
an antagonistic sentence can be seen as
a form of attack so it is much better
and more constructive instead to use
sentences such as it excuse me I think
you've taken my seat this is less
confrontational which will mean your
life is full of a lot less conflicts