Okay, so does everybody know that movie, "Pacific Rim"?
It's a story about humanity's endless fight with Godzilla clones using these things.
They're called Jaegers.
Jaegers are basically just giant robots that require 2 people to pilot them.
Those two people have to be capable of using a kind of mind link with each other, but we're going to ignore that for now.
A few weeks ago, a friend sent me a link to a Reddit post that might have proposed the most dangerous weapon in the omniverse, using Jaegers.
The setup is basically as follows:
So it takes 2 people to pilot 1 Jaeger, which is about 41.6x larger than the average person.
But what if we took 2 Jaegers and had them pilot an even bigger Jaeger, 41.6x larger than the average Jaeger...
and we just kept doing this until we ran out of people on Earth?
The result is TERRIFYING!
You see, we're going to have to do this about 32 times before we run out of people.
And if these calculations are correct, the Infinity Jaeger is going to threaten pretty much every reality in existence...
because it ends up being 1.1*10^52 meters tall!
I know that just sounds like a lot of numbers, but for perspective's sake:
if our entire universe were the size of an atom,
the Infinity Jaeger would be 10 times larger THAN OUR SUN!
Obviously, it must be stopped!
Now if we just let physics do the work for us, we're in luck,
because anything with that kind of mass and density will collapse under its own gravity and form a black hole.
But the size of this particular black hole would be
That means it has a diameter of [3.49 trequadragintillion] universes and it's still going to kill us all.
We need a better plan.
And I really had to think about this; if we don't use omnipotent characters, because...
you know, those guys are cheating anyway, there's pretty much nobody who can stop this atrocity!
In Star Wars, everybody's dead!
In Dragonball, yeah, they're all dead.
Arceus created the Pokemon universe apparently, but the Infinity Jaeger doesn't care;
that's like creating a subatomic particle as far as its concerned.
I thought, you know, maybe if we gave Thanos the Infinity Gauntlet, he could do some damage..
...but that thing only controls 1 universe at a time, so I guess he's also screwed.
"You're gonna need a bigger potion..."
Eventually I kind of narrowed my options down to Lucifer Morningstar,
or the Reality Bomb.
And neither of those are preferable for obvious reasons.
This monstrosity, this horror machine that the internet has created,
is basically going to cut an enormous gash through the omniverse!
If the Infinity Jaeger moves at speeds comparable to normal Jaegers from its own perspective,
this monster's going to cross 3.9*10^35 lightyears...
in under 3 seconds.
This ignores relativity, but, again, if it doesn't,
that multiversal black hole's going to kill us all anyway, so...
...well, whatever.
Einstein is rolling in his grave right now...
If this thing were to try and kick something, it would inpact with the force of
That's the equivalent of roughly 3*10^176 universes exploding AT ONCE!
PEPE, YOU'VE DOOMED US ALL!
So it was around this time that I noticed I didn't really have an especally good way
of destroying this...this mistake.
I mean, I guess I could be a total wimp and start tapping into higher dimensions
for my answer, but...freaking [who?] would probably
just turn it into chocolate or something...yeah, that would help.
Teleporters proved to be useless because they would have to teleport across, like...
...thousands of universes to even get inside the first layer of the Jaeger...
...so I decided if the intenet created this behemoth, the internet would be the one to put it down!
But no one on my Facebook page gave any good answers, so I went back to Reddit.
Alright, if anybody's watching this video and has found their universe
under the threat of an Infinity Jaeger, here's what you need:
first, you're going to have to get Superman.
Yes, Superman specifically, and make sure it's the Earth-0 Superman for good measure.
Now, I don't know how strong Superman is exactly
(I'm still working on that one),
but it's pretty clear to me that he can at the very least, destroy planets.
And lift them.
He does it all the time.
We also know that he can tap into even more strength the longer he's exposed to a yellow sun.
And he can seemingly do this without any limit, seeing how future versions of him
have apparently been powerful enough to stop universes from collapsing, and
to survive interdimensional space even [WHO?!] couldn't handle.
Remember this guy?
They call him "Superman Prime One Million":
a product of Superman traveling to the other rim of space and time and spending 1,500 years in the Sun!
Well, Reddit thinks we can do better.
Take Superman to about 10 billion years before the Infinity Jaeger was constructed,
and set him inside a yellow sun.
Now fortunately for us, it takes suns about 10 billion years
to go from yellow to red, so you shouldn't need to do any relocating
if you pick the right star.
How much power Superman gains from sitting in the Sun has varied from writer to writer,
but a good rule of thumb stands to be about 3 times stronger, every 15 minutes.
There are 5.256*10^15 minutes in 10 billion years, so...
Ladies and Gentlemen, I introduce you to
Superman Prime TEN BILLION!
This is the omniverse's salvation!
He would be about 5.224*10^167 trillion times stronger than regular Superman.
If we take those planetbusting feats from earlier,
this means Superman can now destroy 9*10^167 trillion universes...
...with a single punch!
That speed I calculated for the Flash over a year ago?!
Superman laughs at it, and the Flash craps his pants!
Superman Prime Ten Billion can juggle 7*10^167 trillion Infinity Jaegers
before he starts to struggle; he ends the fight in less than a second,
with his pinky finger.
But the real question is:
Can he defeat
Elder Bill Sailor Scout Galactus God Super Saiyan One Million
while he's in the Avatar State?!
{Captions written by Serrara Fluttershy}