- Today we ask the age-old question.
- Will it bagel?
- Let's talk about that.
(groovy electronic music)
Good Mythical Morning.
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- Mm-hmm. - Get tickets while they last
at RhettAndLinkLive.com.
- What?
- RhettAndLinkLive.com.
- Now onto bagels.
Truthfully, I didn't even know
what a bagel was until college.
(Rhett chuckles)
I'm not lying, born and raised in Harnett County, y'all.
There's this place on Hillsborough Street
selling the rubberiest donuts I ever wrapped my lips around.
- Now I knew what a bagel was,
I just didn't think you'd be interested. (chuckles)
And in a world where bagels come in all flavors,
we are certain that only the surface
of bageldom has been scratched,
so today we aim to make a deep gash.
It's time for--
- [Rhett and Link] Will It Bagel?
- What I've come to understand is
bagels are dense little bread rings that are boiled,
then baked, then topped with a wide variety of seasonings
and most often served with cream cheese schmear and more.
But that's the old boring bagel.
Our new bagels will be altered.
- Yeah so let's kick things off with a bagel gone hog wild.
Bacon-themed from head to dough, whoa!
We're calling it bagel of pigs.
- Yes.
It's like a Reagon-era political reference bagel.
- (chuckles) Yeah.
I'm all about those.
Okay, tell us about this, Josh.
- [Josh] The Bay of Pigs?
- No no, the bagel. - Oh okay sorry.
So I took bacon and bacon fat and infused that
in the actual dough so you can see bacon soaked
on the actual bagel, topped it with bacon bits
and made a bacon and bacon fat schmear inside.
- Schmear, I like that word.
- It's dense. - It's hefty.
It's hearty, it smells good and greasy.
So how do you eat a bagel?
- Like a burger. - Okay so whoop,
did you see that? - Yeah, you got a little,
you leaked.
- I can't get some momentum there.
Dink it, sink it.
- [Rhett] Oh.
Look what happened in the middle of my bagel
when I took a bite of it.
- [Link] It gushed.
- Came right out of my schmear hole.
Look at that. - Is that the proper term?
- Yeah, every bagel has a schmear hole.
- It's a bit much.
I'm not complaining, it's not that it tastes bad,
but if you were to get through this whole bagel--
- Yeah.
- You'd have to elevate your feet.
You know, you have to be in a reclined position
the rest of the day. - I think I understand
what you mean by that.
I think what we have here is a case
of too much of a good thing.
I honestly think that too much of a good thing can happen
and I felt like it happened.
I mean when it came out of my schmear hole like that,
I was like this is more than my body can handle.
- Sorry man.
- [Josh] Wow.
- Yeah. - What an upset.
- Bacon-- - Will it bagel?
No.
- We like to be the change we wish to see in the world
and the world we believe in has a Taco Bell themed bagel
so welcome to our world.
We're calling this taco bagel.
- [Rhett] (laughs) Yeah.
- Does that work? - Yes.
- Okay. - Oh we got some
fire sauce here. - I feel like I can,
I know what you did by looking at it
but I wanna hear it come out of your mouth anyway.
- [Josh] All right so it's a Doritos locos bagel.
So we infused actual Doritos into the bagel dough
and then crusted that with crushed up Doritos.
Then there is a nacho cheese fire sauce schmear
with Taco Bell meat, lettuce, tomato and sour cream
'cause that's the supreme.
- Supreme style, got it. - Look at that.
It's not that I don't like the tomatoes.
It's just I wanna get a better look at what's underneath.
- Oh that's it.
- [Josh] I like our relationship where I put raw tomatoes
on everything and you just take 'em off
and we never talk about it. - Right.
- We just-- - Never.
We never talk about it.
We're not currently talking about it.
- A little fire sauce.
A-dink it.
Oh, a-dink it. - Air dink.
And sink it.
- Oh gosh, I've got a little on my beard.
This is gonna start happening more and more
so just get used to it. - Mm.
Nacho cheese and fire sauce schmear is good.
- Let me just say the stack, the deck (chuckles)
was stacked in favor of this because everything
at Taco Bell is all the same ingredients rearranged
in a different form. - Mm.
- And all you've done-- - Mm.
- Is just done that exact think again
in a way that they may never anticipate to do.
- It's a freakin' taco bagel?
- Yes. - Like corn tortilla inside.
It tastes amazing. - Yeah, this is very,
very good. - Ho Bruegger's!
- Especially those tomatoes.
- We need to get 'em to mate.
Get Bruegger and Taco Bell to mate.
We did it. - That's not how it works.
Usually it's just a meeting, like a corporate meeting.
They don't actually have to mate.
- It's great!
Make 'em mate!
Taco Bell, will it bagel?
- [Rhett and Link] Yes!
- Now I love classic old-school delicatessens
but they present too many choices.
Do I want a bagel or soup, potato or egg salad?
Should I get eight ounces of pickled herring
or just walk into the ocean with the peace
of knowing I'll never make a decision again?
Well it turns out we can have it all.
Introducing the soup bagel.
- Bagel and soup together but okay Josh.
- [Rhett] I have a feeling that
there's gonna be soup inside!
(both yelling)
(Rhett laughs)
- It's a freakin' flying saucer!
- Woo! - It's a bread bowl.
- I can smell it. - But it's a bagel!
- [Rhett] Put it back, and you don't know.
You're just like it's a big mabel, mabel. (laughs)
- It looks like a freakin' bread wreath.
- And then you're like-
Oh! - Oh!
This is how the aliens are gonna get us.
- Man, look at it through the bagel.
- Let them, look, look.
Put it up to Andrew's camera.
- [Rhett] Look at it through the bagel.
- You gotta get the angle right.
Look at it through the schmear hole.
Hello, is it working, is this right?
Is that it, yes.
- [Rhett] Look through the schmear hole.
- All right let's get into this.
- The legend of the schmear hole.
- Did you just buy the biggest bagel?
- [Josh] No, we made the biggest bagel.
- That's the biggest bagel.
- [Josh] That is a homemade gigantic bagel.
It's topped with oyster crackers, Baco's,
the fake stuff, not the real stuff, and green onions.
Then the inside is a cream cheese chowder.
- And you can play a game where you each pull a side
of the bagel and see who's gonna have good luck this year.
(Link grunts)
We're both gonna have good luck! (laughs)
Whoa! - No we're both
gonna have bad-- - We're both screwed.
Oh gosh, all right.
- Oh look at this, this is a fancy chowder.
Now--
- I think you gotta do something with this part
of the bagel, I feel like you gotta take this--
- I'm gonna hold it and bite it.
- You dab and then you...
Whoa, people would go to a restaurant just for this.
Have you been to the restaurant with the soup bagel?
No, there's a soup bagel?
Yeah, have you looked through the schmear hole?
- I know, this is like a family appetizer thing.
- Everybody would be satisfied.
The kids, the old folks, everybody in between.
- Right, especially if you put a Skee Ball machine
in the lobby.
- And you try to get it in the middle of the bagel?
- Yeah.
Soup, will it bagel?
- [Rhett and Link] Yes.
- If I were to give bagels some constructive criticism,
I would have to say they're too beige.
They struggle with communication skills
and they're not Jell-O. - Right.
- So we've gone ahead and fixed two out of three
and we're calling it
♪ Jell-O darkness my old bagel ♪
(Rhett chuckles)
AKA the Jell-O bagel.
- [Rhett] There's stuff in the jiggle, what's in the jiggle?
- [Josh] So in the jiggle is actually salmon
that has been cured in blue Jell-O powder then encased--
- Ho, what? - In blue Jell-O.
- Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa--
- Why you gotta put salmon?
- Hold on, I was excited. - It's a bagel.
- I was excited, I like salmon.
- [Josh] We only had the budget to put salmon
in one of the bagels so we chose Jell-O.
And so then there's also gelatinized--
- Can you see that? - Strawberry cream cheese.
- It's like a specimen.
It's like something that's been grown in a lab.
- [Josh] You can break open the Jell-O
and just eat the fish.
- Oh now you can see it.
- Okay so this is, you said that this is
gelatinized cream cheese, is that the word you used?
- [Josh] Yeah, the pink stuff.
- [Rhett] And then this is just a rainbow bagel.
- [Josh] But it's made with four different Jell-O flavors,
actually mixed in so the bagel itself is also Jell-O.
- Man.
- But what do you think the salmon is gonna do for this?
- [Josh] Oh I don't know, I don't know anything.
- It's gonna make it taste bad.
I don't think I can do a, oh gosh,
look what's happening to that.
I'm gonna have to just take the top off to get the bottom
and then try to get, oh gosh.
- [Link] I'll do the same.
- Make sure you get some salmon.
Dink it.
And sink it.
- Jell-O tastes good.
- Oh gosh. - Schmear tastes good.
- Oh, I hit the salmon pocket.
- I know I got some salmon but oh,
just hit the salmon pocket.
Mm.
- The salmon pocket is not as unpleasant
as I anticipated.
- It's a wicked little surprise but it is overpowered
by the sweetness of everything else.
- But I would think that if I was eating this,
I might send it back and ask why is there fish in it?
- Right. - You know?
So I appreciate the effort here.
- It's actually very delightful--
- Except for the salmon. - Apart from that.
- Yeah, right.
I'm sorry.
This is one situation where salmon came
to the party and ruined it.
- [Link] Jell-O, will it bagel?
- No. - No.
Except if you remove the salmon.
- Yeah.
Well it's been a pretty good ride
but at some point we must have angered the great almighty
and it looks like trouble's coming our way.
This bagel is an old testament style nightmare.
We're calling it flagel. (chuckles)
- [Link] What?
Okay so, what did you reference, the plagues?
What's in this?
- [Josh] Yeah correct.
So we have the darkness of course,
which is the charcoal and squid ink bagel
and then we have the rain of frogs
which is like you have a frog salad done in the style
of a whitefish salad.
You have the locusts, obviously it came with the pestilence
and that's grasshoppers and then of course,
the river turning to blood
which is why we have a blood schmea.
- Schmea. - Blood schmea.
- Schmea. - It's a take on it.
- You could sell this recipe
to vacation bible schools everywhere.
- [Josh] Oh yeah.
- The kids will love it and learn so much.
(Josh laughs)
- Okay. (Rhett sighs)
Okay we just had our internal existential crisis.
Now let's proceed to eat this.
- Well I mean, do we make a choice?
- Did God?
(crew laughs)
- That's a pretty deep question.
(both laugh)
- Oh yeah.
Okay we'll discuss that in More. (laughs)
I think we got, I mean--
- You gotta eat both.
- But I think you have to bite the open face
and then bite this open face.
- But which open face do you bite first?
'Cause if you're wrong, you'll suffer for all eternity.
(Rhett laughs)
Okay.
- [Link] Now that's frogs and mayonnaise?
- [Josh] Yeah more or less.
- I'mma bite that first.
'Cause this is blood schmear.
- Yeah yeah yeah yeah.
- When I smelled it, there's something that's in the blood.
- Yeah, bugs. - Cream cheese.
- Locusts. - Oh yeah
there's cream cheese. - Okay.
- [Josh] Should be nice.
- That-- - It should be nice, he says.
- It actually, because there's so much
being thrown at this-- - It should be nice.
- I'm like, I mean--
- You're not going to like it
but I appreciate the positive attitude.
- Let's let our people go.
(Rhett and crew laughing)
Which means just bite these I guess, I don't know.
It's a forced analogy. - I don't know
who the people are.
Yeah yeah yeah.
- All right so I'm going for the white one,
then the red one. - Yeah here we go.
(Link gags)
(Rhett retches)
That blood! (gags)
That blood is hard to take.
- I think there's so much bread and so much frog,
I think I can do this.
- So much bread like manna.
- I think we can part the sea of our own self-doubt--
- Yeah. - And trudge forward
into swallowing this nasty. - Yeah.
And then let the walls of the sea crash down
on the army of the Egyptians.
- It kinda became an unanalogy
at the end.
(Link grunts)
(Rhett growls)
Good source of protein.
- [Josh] Yeah, big time.
- Mm. - It's easier than
40 years in the wilderness.
- Problem is is like four swallows.
- Yeah, I'm having trouble getting it,
I'm having trouble working through it.
- Just one swallow.
The blood has passed its nasty stage.
(Rhett exhales)
(Link exhales)
(Rhett exhales)
(Link exhales) (Rhett exhales)
- And Moses came down from the mountain and said--
(both exhale)
(crew chuckles)
- The plague-- - Will it bagel?
No!
- Good gosh! - What are you crazy?
- Thank you for liking, commenting and subscribing.
- You know what time it is.
- Hi I'm Chloe.
- And I'm Joe.
And we just did Will It Bagel.
- Now it's time to spin the Wheel--
- [Both] Of Mythicality.
- We just do it. - We didn't steal the idea.
Click the top link to watch us try a spaghetti
and meat bagel with Josh in Good Mythical More.
- And to find out where
the Wheel of Mythicality's gonna land.
- [Rhett] Support a more adventurous tomorrow.
Get yourself a Future Fast Food tee today at Mythical.com.