You're a fat pig.
Why are you even famous?
You have zero talent.
You're so disgusting.
You don't deserve to wear underwear.
You're the reason the healthcare system is f**ked up.
What's wrong with her stomach?
Does she have a disease?
You look like an elephant.
You're legs are huge, and you have cankles.
Put some clothes on, slut.
I was at all girl's schools until I was thirteen, fourteen.
And at the same time I used to read loads of different magazines.
And Elle Girl had Search for a Supermodel, and I entered that.
And I didn't win, but I got scouted by an agency while I was there.
Then I started doing some test shoots and little fashion shows, and I had a taste
for this fashion industry that I loved and wanted to be part of.
Even though I was super slim, I just wasn't skinny enough.
They would constantly measure my hips, like every six months, and I saw these other models,
who I aspired to be, and I was like, well, clearly I have to try and change my body
to be able to be successful.
My body was my enemy, and everyday I was going into battle and trying to change my measurements.
I would pick it apart, every single day, measure it.
Obsession with exercise, obsession with calorie restriction,
and it was a complete consumption of my life.
It was awful.
I wasn't fitting into samples, I just wasn't slim enough.
So, unfortunately I got dropped.
I tried eight different agencies, and they all said no for, like, varying reasons.
If it was "Too curvy" "Too womanly" "Too mature" You were always "too" something.
About four or five years of this battle, I found out about plus size modeling.
They saw, and then said I was going to be "too small", and that I had to put on
two dress sizes to be considered for plus sized modeling.
Which, to me, was just like, the nail in the coffin.
I was like, are you kidding me?
I just spent five, six years sacrificing so much, trying to fit into that one ideal,
that one small standard, and I was never good enough.
And it just was, a frustration, which turned then, into motivation.
Rather than change myself, I wanted to change the industry.
That became my ammunition.
All the people who told me I couldn't.
Even myself, who told me that I wasn't good enough.
I just really wanted to prove that there was a different way to do this.
So I then invested in looking after myself.
Mentally, physically, emotionally.
I found out that working out could be for so many more reasons than just being skinny.
It was for empowerment.
It was to feel good.
And the same with food.
Food wasn't my enemy.
Food was pleasure, food was enjoyment, food was cooking and having time with friends.
When I became happier and more confident and accepting of my body, I started booking clients
because there wasn't any other models at my size.
I started working quite a lot.
All you have to do is be yourself.
I had a boyfriend from the ages of fifteen and a half, until twenty one.
And that was like, the majority of the time when I was struggling.
He definitely didn't treat me very well.
I wasn't able to see that I deserved better.
And until I really came full circle, it took me a long time to build up the confidence
to break up with him and move on.
If you're not at ease and in love with yourself here, it transitions to everything.
I was able to use all the struggles that I had to help other people who felt the same
way as I did growing up.
I hope today, that I can encourage you all, if you haven't already started,
to start that journey of self love.
This body is our home.
It's an outer package and we can't place value and worth in the size of it.
Please celebrate this body, and stop talking to yourself in a negative way.
If you start talking to yourself in a loving way, you're going to feel so much better,
and your life is going to be so much happier.
I'm Iskra Lawrence.
I'm twenty seven.
And I am beautiful.