Hello, my name is Amanda
And I'm here to talk to my mom about coming out.
I only came out to her because i had to and i have not
talked to her about that moment since. Let's call her.
Hi! Oh my god, look at your hair!
I knew you would say that. Can you tilt your laptop. A little bit towards your face
So let's talk about my coming out.
What were you thinking when I came out?
I wasn't really sure because you had been in a fight
with one of your friends and it was causing you a lot of grief.
But then what was your reaction when the fight was because I was in love with her?
All I kept saying in my head was oh, now that makes sense.
Do you, ever have an inkling before that I was gay?
I was totally clueless.
Oh, okay.
There was that time when when you were in high school that I walked in on you and another girl, I can't remember who it was
and you guys were sitting in the dark in the living room, and I just remember thinking
what the hell are they doing? That's weird
I'm trying to think if that was that time I was on a date... do you remember of who it was?
No, I don't think so. -That might have been an innocent thing then.
What about the fact that I was very obsessed with a lot of actresses and the Spice Girls and that kind of thing
Oh, girls growing up look up to women who, you know, they admire and that they want to be like.
Did you ever have a moment of relief that I was gay because then
I wouldn't get accidentally pregnant?
No, I never thought of that at all.
Surprise!
Have you gotten more or less comfortable over time with gay people or my sexuality in general?
You're talking to the wrong parent. Remember, I was in the restaurant industry so I was around gay people all the time
[That's true.] and they were my favorite people.
Did we get closer after I came out? I think just in that area we got closer,
like, you were more
openly asking me about love interests. -Yes, I wasn't really comfortable asking
about any love interest when you're in high school because you didn't seem to be interested in
anybody. Except for - - - do you remember - - -?
I do remember - - -. He's gay.
Get outta here. -Yeah, he's gay now. Do you have any thoughts on how out and proud I am now?
I was thinking about this today. I would of course like to see you dating someone.
Same.
Did you ever have that moment that parents have
a concern that it, like, it might be harder for me because I was coming out as gay?
At first I didn't think that at all. I was just happy
that you knew that so that you could be happy the rest of your life, and not just tortured the rest of your life.
Because things weren't working out for you with men, so yeah, I did. Well, I was worried
You'd get into a situation
where you might get beat up or you might, you know, I just wasn't sure. It was upsetting to me your friends
who came out to their parents, and then their parents just kind of
disowned them. I could never understand that. As a parent, I just want you to be happy.
Do you have any advice for parents who might be dealing with their child coming out?
I can't see that mindset. I just I don't understand that mindset in any way, shape, or form that people would have
a problem with it and I think all parents
Want this is for their kids to be happy. And if that's the way
your child is gonna be happy then you just need to accept that, even if you don't agree with it.
Right. You just need to accept that.
I am very blessed that,
uh, you are very accepting, and very cool with it. -Did you think I wouldn't be?
I thought that I would be seen as a disappointment in the family
So. -Okay, you really need to look around.
You know a lot of people have horror stories about coming out, and thankfully, I had a very
supportive bubble in within my family, within
my friends. Because my mom is awesome and I was not seen as a disappointment, so yay!