- My dimensions have always been okay
until I went to a major modeling agency.
(upbeat twinkily music)
Hi, I'm Brianna I'm and Editor at BuzzFeed
and I'm also a model.
I first started modeling when I was in high school.
I would say I was probably around the age of 14 or 15.
Few weeks ago I got a DM on Instagram
from a major modeling agency.
They asked me to come in to just see me
and see if there was a possible opportunity
for me to get signed.
I was super excited about this.
When I got to the agency I went into an office
and there was a guy sitting there.
It was weird because he didn't seem too excited to see me.
He kind of immediately gave off the feeling of
you're wasting my time.
And he kind of looked me up and down.
He told me I had beautiful skin and a really pretty face.
And then it came time to take my measurements,
and everything changed.
He found that I am a 37 hip online it says that I'm a 34 hip
because at the time I was very unhealthy.
I had no appetite because I was going through
a very stressful time in my life.
My doctors were concerned and it's just not a size that
I think I should have to be to be able to do a photo shoot.
He told me if I wanted to be able to sign to this agency
that I would need to get back down to a 34 hip.
I was ready to leave that office
and diet, workout super hard.
He asked me more about my brand and he said,
"When I look at you I see you're a pretty girl
but I see a girl who doesn't know how to dress."
I came in with an ALDO bag.
And then he asked me where my heels were from
and I told him ALDO too and he said,
"That's what I see, I see someone who doesn't have a lot
of money, isn't putting a lot of money into their fashion.
That bag, those shoes, it's not doing a lot."
At that point I was ready to cry.
And I knew if he asked me anything else,
I was not gonna be able to answer it without tearing up
because I just felt...
I don't know I just felt
like they were a lot of things I needed to work on
and change about myself that I was not gonna be able to do.
He then pointed to a girl on the wall,
they were tons of girls that were already signed.
And this girl was Caucasian and he said,
"This girl used to be a 36 hip
and she was able to get down to a 34."
And at that point I knew I probably was not gonna get signed
because it was time for me to open my mouth.
And I told him that girl is able to do that
because her ancestry does not come from Africa.
My butt is always going to be big, that's just in our DNA.
And for you to expect me to be able
to come all the way down to 34.
I don't know if I can do that and still be healthy.
And he was like, well you just have to wanna work for it.
I asked him maybe could I be considered for curve modeling.
I in no way think I'm curve model
but I was just very confused as to where I fit in.
And he immediately told me curve modeling
was some fantasy industry that was created
to make women feel better about being big.
He doesn't have any space for it at his agency.
And just a reminder this is a pretty big agency.
It's coming from the source of somebody who
knows fashion and isn't willing to consider people,
unless they're this super small size.
And so after that conversation he was like
"Well, it was really nice meeting you."
And as soon as I walked out I started crying
and I called my Mom because I felt like (bleep).
And I was so confused if I should try to pursue this
and prove myself that I can get down to that size,
for this guy who may not even sign me.
Or if I should just be happy with myself and accept myself.
I came to work and I told my co-workers.
They all encouraged me to keep my head up
and that I didn't need this.
And then after that two weeks later without being signed
to that modeling agency I booked six shows for Fashion Week.
I'm telling this story because I want people to know
that the modeling industry is nowhere near
where it needs to be.
And a lot of people think just because they see
a dark skinned model here and a curved model there,
that we're making huge changes and moving forward.
I would say I've noticed like for dark skin
you're Brazilian or you're from East Africa.
But it's rarely ever an African-American.
Or if you're dark skin you have to have European features.
They're literally saying somebodies
physical makeup is a trend.
I would say if you're young and you wanna pursue modeling
just know that you have to have a strong back,
when you go into this industry.
And know that it's not gonna be easy.
For the future I hope that one day we can just go onto
a modeling agencies website,
and there won't be a section for curve.
To me it's almost as if what if we put a section
for black models and a section for Latino models.
It's just weird.
There are Asian people in this world,
there's black people in this world,
there's women with 42 hip, so why are we separating them?
If we wouldn't to separate by race
why are we separating them by waist?
If that agent is watching this video
maybe in the moment you upset me,
but in the long-term it actually empowered me to keep going.
At the end of the day what I do wanna do with this industry
and even here at BuzzFeed is to impact lives,
and let girls know that they are okay how they are.
(upbeat music)