What do you resent
about our time together as a couple?
Resent?
Yeah.
I don't think I resent anything.
You know how I feel
about the decisions that we made.
But I wouldn't call it resent.
I don't know. - Right.
Because, again, I'm glad it all happened.
Because I learned a lot.
Like a lot.
Yeah.
That day when you texted me
that you forgive
me, like, did you really mean it?
Yeah. - But it was just so random.
I mean, was it supposed to be- was there
a time frame for me to forgive you?
No, I know is not- but is the way-
Like it was so random
because the night
before, I deleted your number.
Oh.
The night before, I just got fed up
and I deleted your number.
And then I was at work,
and then you texted me.
And of course,
I know your number by heart,
so I knew it was you.
But I was like, This is so weird.
I just deleted
your number the night before.
And then you text me the next day
and I'm like,
when you send that to me is like
what do you say to that?
Like, I didn't know what to say.
You could’ve said: ‘okay’. I don’t know.
I didn't know what to say.
I mean, I said
I kind of said the right thing,
but I just didn't know what to say
because it was
it was like out of the blue.
And I can't really
tell your emotions through text,
you know, whatever the case may be,
being that we don't really talk.
So
I hope you meant it.
Like for real, for real.
Mmhm. - Okay.
I do.
It was a lot to think about.
Trying- I was just-
I can't be mad at myself and
because
it was like I can't-
I couldn't-
I didn't want to forgive you.
And I just wanted to just
keep being
upset at you and in for,
you know, blame you and stuff like that.
I just.
And then one day I just woke up
and I was just
I felt
like a lot of weight
got off my shoulders.
And I wasn't- I wasn't upset.
I wasn't angry.
It was nothing.
I was just
I was just like, I'm over it, you know?
I forgive you.
It's okay.
I think it's all right.
You know,
just gotta move on now.
That's.
That was my mindset when I woke up.
So.
What are you
hesitant to tell me?
Hmm...
Now's not the time
to be hesitant.
Clearly.
Um, I feel like
we've been pretty honest all the time.
Yeah. - I feel like when we first broke up,
I was hesitant
about telling you how much I care for you still.
Okay. - And that took me a while
to, like, get over that.
Like, even when we were saying
we were just friends, I still, like,
had a hope that something would change.
Okay.
That makes sense, I guess.
I mean,
I think- I think, I mean, at the time, it
definitely felt...
well, it was like a lot of things,
but there were several times
where I felt like we kept trying
and like
it just
never fit
or like things
kept fucking up and it didn't-
When we had dinner on Valentine's Day,
that was like
one situation that I always remembered.
So yeah.
Is that when we started
being friends, though?
We were trying to be. - Okay.
But then after that... - I still was like-
Oh, maybe there's hope. Oh, we’re
having a Valentine's dinner together.
And then you were a dick.
And I was like: Mmm, gotta go.
Because then... - I realized.
And I was still seeing... - Yeah.
Okay.
That's right.
Yeah.
These are-
These are so nice.
What's your fondest memory from our time
together?
Uh...
I'm going to cry.
I won't cry.
There was a night
when I was in the apartment with ___________ and ____________.
We were in kind of a rough patch.
But you came over and slow danced with me
and rub
my feet and-
Do you remember this at all?
Not quite.
And we listened to, like, oh,
it was that guy that was at _________.
Uh huh.
Do you know who I'm talking about?
Yeah. “I'm gonna
hold you ‘til it’s...”
Yeah. Yeah.
And then you held me.
And you danced with me.
And we stayed up for a long time.
And... - I do remember that.
Yeah.
That was a good memory.
It was a tough time, but a good memory. - It was a tough time.
Yeah.
Oh!
Oh, okay.
Let’s change it up a bit.
How have I changed
from when we first started dating?
And how do you feel about it? - Oh, my God.
How have I changed since I was 14 years old?
We have spent over a quarter of our lives
with each other.
We-
We went from being stupid freshmen
to stupid adults, but, like...
Oh, it’s such a nice time.
Yeah.
Yeah, we- I have no idea who I would be
without you and-
Oh, for sure.
That was, like,
our whole crying over pasta- Was-
Who we would be without each other.
Yeah. - Yeah.
How have I changed?
I think that
when we first started our relationship,
you were not in the best place.
Oh, yeah. - You had-
Yeah.
Seasonal depression.
It was worse than that. - It was worse than that.
It was just-
This is bad.
It was just bad.
And you are so different now.
You know how to take care of yourself.
You...
You're an adult.
And I don't take credit for that at all.
But, yeah,
you're- you're one of the
most mature people I know.
How did that happen?
Aw, thank you. - Yeah.
You are an amazing filmmaker.
I already said that.
But- - Sometimes I feel like
you don't realize how much I've changed,
because I feel like I revert back
to old habits
when we’re together.
A lot. I was listening to the, like,
watching some footage
I took of you for my winter break
film and I, like,
hate myself in them.
I just- I'm like, do you still like me?
Do you think I'm pretty?
And I'm just like, what the fuck?
Like, I just really needed you
even, like, six months ago.
And it's annoying.
And I'm not like that with people now.
Yeah. - I don't think. I hope not-
but I was really like that with you even.
And I just
pride myself in
when I can have full composure
whenever we're hanging out
because you have a really,
really big hold over me.
So... - Yeah.
Yeah.
Um,
if for some reason
I lost all my memories,
what is the first thing
you would tell me about us?
Oh, man, that's a great-
That's a big question.
I would say
that I'm your best friend.
I would say I take that- I take that title.
I take that title.
Good.
I’d say I'm your best friend
and that I love you
more than
most people I know.
But I guess
the next people
will probably be my mom and my dad
and that we can talk for hours
and you know,
you can always say anything to me.
You've always
said anything that you want.
So you can always be free to be yourself.
I’d say that our families are... your family's
basically my family.
That we grew up-
we grew up with each other
and we're
pretty much basically one person.
And what’s yours is mine and mine is yours.
So... - Aw, that's nice.
I think I would appreciate that.
I'd also want you to tell me
everything that I already hated.
Oh, yeah.
It'd be horrible to come out
and have different likes and dislikes.
We might not be cool anymore.
You might be like, Huh? - Oh, yeah, I'd...
definitely have to show pictures that-
Look at this picture.
You can watch this movie.
Show you all those things
because we all know how that goes. - Exactly.
Yeah.
If this were to be
our last conversation, what's something
you never want me to forget?
Last conversation?
I don't know.
I don't know why
I'm tearing up, but, like,
I don't know. Everything about you.
You're just. You're so loved
and you're so kind
and there's so many people
that care about you.
And I don't know.
That's really sweet.
I haven't been validated like that in a long time.
It's nice to hear.
If this were to be our last conversation,
what's something
you'd never want me to forget?
Um.
How much you’re loved, um.
Like, literally.
I know that everybody who knows
you fucking loves you.
I have endless love for you.
And I will always have endless love
for you.
That's nice.
And sometimes I feel like
you just don't believe
that you're that loved
and it kind of breaks
my heart sometimes because you are.
And despite, like,
everything you've been through and, like,
our individual issues, like,
I fucking love the shit out of you.
Like,
you're amazing.
I don't know. I just like.
I fucking- like,
I know that you're supposed
to be in my life, you know,
and you're valued and
life would suck if you were not here.
Thanks.
I wanna answer for you.
I wouldn't want you to forget
that...
You're good.
Like...
It's okay.
Inside.
and out.
Like I said,
I never had, like,
anything negative to say about you.
Mm.
And I think
you deserve, like, nothing but goodness
and happiness and
love.
A lot of love.
I feel the same about you.
Thank you.
Dammit! - You're really trying not to cry.
I know. I was really, really trying. - Yeah.