Which of you Americans would like to be the first
to try a Canadian Fat Cake?
Hey, I wouldn't mind being' the--
[fighting]
May I?
Okay, Sam, take a bite.
Shut up!
I need to focus.
[chiming]
Mm.
Ah.
No. [groaning]
It's really good, huh?
It's so much better than good.
It's... ah... it's like eating a fat angel.
Side smile or ponytail?
I don't know, Nora.
The one on the left's cute but the one on the right
really captures your inner insanity.
You really think this one makes me look cute?
Dude, if I don't get some food in the next hour,
I'm gonna eat Freddie.
Get her some food, Nora.
Cornelius is one good looking dog.
Hey, don't hog the wad.
I can't think straight. I can't eat. I-I-I--
Sam, we have hot quesadillas if you--
Look, Sam, I get that you're feeling a little--
Who cares? So I kissed you. So...
So maybe I do like you a little bit.
It doesn't matter 'cause... there's no way
I'd ever go out with you or be your little girlfriend
and dang this place makes good quesadillas.
- Can I have one? - No.
[music playing]
"Sam, I made you some soup. Enjoy."
Well... don't mind if I do, Mr. Note.
[screaming]
Hey, no, no, no, no, no!
[grunting]
Who do you think you are, you monster?!
You're a dirty monster! That's my soup!
You crazy, stupid big monster!
You don't go tasting other people's soup!
It's me! It's me! Don't kill me! I'm not ready!
[sighing]
[Sam] Got anymore great ideas?
Yeah, I have one.
[Sam] Oh, God.
You like sloppy joes?
[Sam] Everyone likes sloppy joes.
Exactly.
But, what if instead of buns, we made 'em with waffles,
we could call 'em, sloppy waffles.
When did you think of that?
A few months ago.
Why did you wait to tell me?
Okay. We've got to get out of this room
because we have two majorly important things to do.
What?
Murder Dice. - And?
Eat sloppy waffles.
[gasping] That's my thing.
I'm back.
Good, I'm starving.
Where's our lunch?
What do you mean?
We told you to go get lunch?
I did. It was yummy. [chuckles]
So, you didn't bring us any?
Any what?
Go sit on the floor over there.
Yay.
The winner of locker 239 is... Freddie Benson.
Yes! Yeah! Up top.
Freddie's guess was exactly correct,
2,718 Fat Cakes.
Ha! In your face, you blonde-headed demon!
Yeah.
Uh, wait, hold on a second.
Huh?
It seems another student
has also guessed the number correctly.
Oh, no.
And the other winner who will share locker 239
with Freddie is Sam Puckett.
Ow! Oh, yeah! Sam's a winner!
Sam Puckett is a winner yet again, Fredward.
[groaning]
Told ya mama knows Fat Cakes.
So, how does all this make me girlier?
Well, this is good practice
'cause your eating habits aren't the best.
What are you saying?
I'm saying, it's not ladylike to talk with your mouth full.
What I gotta finish chewing before I can talk?
Yes.
Who eats half a cheeseburger, then falls asleep?
Someone who just lost
the other half of his cheeseburger.
Sam, gross.
It's not my fault.
Waiting around for people makes me crave meat.
Th-They don't let you sleep or- or watch TV or go online.
And... [whimpering]
And they expect you to be nice to all the customers.
And I'm not even allowed to eat the chili.
Do you know what it's like to be me,
surrounded by giant pots of chilli
and not allowed to eat it?!
[sobbing]
- Where's my purse? - Here, here.
[in distance] My name is Quinn
and I love money.
You keep fried chicken in your purse?
It's my emergency thigh.
[in distance] Coming up next,
the question and answer round,
followed by the talent competition.
The talent competition, what are you gonna do?
Um, I'll just sing the song you were gonna sing.
- Do you know the words? - No, teach me.
Okay, where did you put the lyric sheet?
In my purse.
Uh.
Are these ribs?
I can't eat chicken all the time.
But, but, I've already gone over this twice. Uh.
Okay, I'll tell you again.
I want two buckets of fried chicken,
one spicy, one extra spicy.
And I want three chili biscuits.
No, no, no. Don't transfer me to the main menu. Oh, God.
No, I am not cuckoo. The baby flew away.
Yes, yes, I want cheese on my chili biscuits.
[everyone groaning]
What did Zapathon say?
Nothing, they just kept sending me back
to the main menu.
Sam, what did you find out?
That Tub-A-Chicken charges extra for cheese on chili biscuits.
Doh, extra?
If I'm thirsty, I can just do this!
Mm. That was refreshing. [chuckles]
But, wait, now I'm hungry. Hmm, what should I--
Ya see... I just had a drink... and a snack.
Right. Now, lately on iCarly, we've been thinking about...
[both] squash!
See, kids don't eat enough vegetables these days.
So we're gonna set a good example.
Watch this.
- Uh! - What's wrong?
Oh, no. Uh.
Oh, my God, you lost a tooth.
See what you get for eating vegetables.
Then aim your eyeballs at...
[both] bitty big heads!
[cheering]
[knocking]
Carly! Hey! Carly! It's Sam! [knocking]
I'm hungry!
Carly, I need food!
[laughing]
The fridge is empty!