ALL: (SINGING) La la la la la la la.
La la la la la la la.
Welcome to the Furchester Hotel.
FUNELLA: Your room is ready for you.
FURGUS: Just need to get the
PHOEBE: The lamp, the desk, the rug, the sink.
PILLOW: A pillow for your head.
ELMO AND COOKIE MONSTER: The hotel's
run by monsters and staff beyond compare.
ALL: We've got the kind of service
you won't find anywhere.
So welcome to the Furchester.
CRITTERS: La la la la la la.
La la la la la la.
ALL: Welcome to the Furchester.
CRITTERS: La la la la la la.
La la la la la la.
FURGUS: Dine in style.
FUNELLA: So genteel.
COOKIE MONSTER: Cookie come with every meal.
CRITTERS: La la la la la la la la la la la.
ELMO: Here's your key.
PHOEBE: So check right in.
ALL: Let your furry stay begin.
Welcome to the Furchester Hotel.
FURGUS: Furchester TV.
[QUACKING]
FUNELLA: [SINGING] La la la la la la la la la--
[BELL RINGING]
Oh, thank you, Isabel.
We welcome you with furry arms.
[QUACKING]
Ah, oh, I'm terribly sorry.
I don't speak duck.
MR. QUACKMORE: That's all right.
We speak monster.
FUNELLA: Oh.
MRS. QUACKMORE: We learnt it from watching TV.
MR. QUACKMORE: Oh, we love TV even more
than we love pond weed.
[GIGGLY QUACKING]
FUNELLA: Ah, TV.
Oh, would you like something to eat in the dining room?
MRS. QUACKMORE: No thanks.
We'd just like to get to our room.
MR. QUACKMORE: Right away.
[QUACK]
FUNELLA: Of course.
Phoebe, Elmo.
ELMO: Yeah.
PHOEBE: Yes, mum.
FUNELLA: Could you please show Mr. and Mrs. Quackmore
to the paddle suite.
PHOEBE: Yes, mum.
ELMO: Elmo will take your luggage.
[QUACK]
MR. QUACKMORE: Thank you.
PHOEBE: This way.
Here's your room, Mr. and Mrs. Quackmore.
[EXCITED QUACKING]
[GIGGLE]
[DISAPPOINTED QUACKING]
MRS. QUACKMORE: Where is it?
MR. QUACKMORE: Must be here somewhere.
PHOEBE: It's not behind the door.
ELMO: Nope.
Not under the couch.
Wait, what are we looking for again?
MRS. QUACKMORE: The TV, of course.
MR. QUACKMORE: We need a TV.
[QUACK]
MRS. QUACKMORE: Oh, we're sorry Mr. and Mrs. Quackmore,
but we don't have a TV at the Furchester.
MR. QUACKMORE: No TV?
But we'll miss our favorite shows.
Tonight it's "Duck's Got Quacks."
MRS. QUACKMORE: Yeah, and "Waddle with Ducks."
[QUACKING FANFARE]
[DEJECTED QUACKING]
PHOEBE: Oh, dear.
FURGUS: What's all the fuss?
Is it the plumbing again?
PHOEBE: Well, we've got a problem, dad.
Our duck guests are upset.
There's no TV in their room.
ELMO: Yeah.
FURGUS: I'm sure there's an old one in the office downstairs.
[QUACK]
MR. QUACKMORE: A TV?
You have a TV?
[CHEERFUL QUACKING]
FURGUS: I'll be right back.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
FUNELLA: That's not it.
FURGUS: I know it's in here somewhere.
CRITTER: Hey, Lady.
I'm trying to hibernate in here.
FUNELLA: Oh, I'm so sorry.
Oh, that's not it.
FURGUS: Oh, what's that?
[GRUNTING]
Oh, this could be it.
Right.
FUNELLA: Oh.
FURGUS: Oh.
No, not quite.
FUNELLA: Oh, I see it is right at the back by the hose pipe.
FURGUS: Great.
FUNELLA: Careful.
FURGUS: Oh, it's quite large.
FUNELLA: Oh.
Careful, darling.
FURGUS: OK, OK.
There we are.
Good as new.
FUNELLA: Will you be all right getting it up the stairs?
FURGUS: Oh, yes.
I'll take it up in the lift.
FUNELLA: All right.
FURGUS: Great.
Here we go.
Mm-hmm.
[GONG SOUNDING]
[GASP]
GREEN MONSTER: Tea.
ORANGE MONSTER: Time.
[EXCITED CHATTER]
FURGUS: I need to take this.
Excuse-- oh gosh.
No.
Oh, ah.
Ha, ha.
[GROANING]
OK, lift.
Here we go.
[GRUNT]
Oh, oh no.
The lift's not working.
I guess it'll have to be the stairs then.
[GRUNT]
[QUACK]
MR. QUACKMORE: Is the TV here yet?
PHOEBE: Not yet, Mr. Quackmore.
How about we play a game whilst we wait.
Duck duck goose?
ELMO: Yeah, OK.
How about-- how about we sing a duck song, huh?
MRS. QUACKMORE: Well, they both sound like fun,
but it's not TV, is it?
MR. QUACKMORE: Yes.
We just want our TV.
[QUACKING]
FURGUS: And here it is.
Ha ha.
[EXCITED QUACKING]
ELMO: Phew.
FURGUS: And it's ready to go.
[CHEERING]
Oh.
PHOEBE: Oh no.
[DEJECTED QUACKING]
FURGUS: I think there might be a little problem.
MR. QUACKMORE: If the TV's not working,
then we can't watch our shows.
MRS. QUACKMORE: And we need to see our shows.
That's a problem, that is.
PHOEBE: It's a catastrophe.
ELMO: Yeah.
[BELL RINGING]
ALL: (SINGING) It's more than just a slip up or a mess up
or a mess.
Help.
A Furchester catastrophe.
We need to fix it "fastrophe," and once it's
in the "pastrophe," let's ring the bell for [INAUDIBLE].
Catastrophe, catastrophe.
ELMO: What a "disastrophe."
ALL: Catastrophe, castrophe.
We need to fix it "fastrophe."
Catastrophe, catastrophe.
And once it's in the "pastrophe."
It's a disaster-- what's a disaster-- it's a catastrophe.
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
FURGUS: It doesn't have to be a catastrophe.
I can fix the TV.
[CHEERING]
But It's going to take a while.
[WHINY QUACKING]
[GRUNTING]
OK.
[GRUNTS]
[SIGH]
FUNELLA: Oh, dear, dear, dear.
How are we going to keep Mr. and Mrs. Quackmore happy
until the TV is fixed.
PHOEBE: We'd better put our furry heads together and think.
ELMO: Oh, oh.
FURGUS: OK.
[CHATTER]
Oh, I know.
We could play games with them.
How about hide and duck?
FUNELLA: Or have a duck sing song.
PHOEBE: We already asked them to do both of those things, but--
ELMO: All they want to do is watch TV.
PHOEBE: Yeah.
Fuzzah wubbah.
That gives me a monster idea.
What if we put on our own TV shows.
Welcome to Furchester TV.
MR. QUACKMORE: Our favorite shows will be starting now.
MRS. QUACKMORE: And we're missing them.
[DEJECTED QUACKING]
PHOEBE: This is Furchester TV.
MRS. QUACKMORE: TV?
[QUACK]
MR. QUACKMORE: Oh, but will it show our favorite ducky shows?
PHOEBE: Coming up next, it's "Ducks Got Quacks."
[QUACKING]
Quack quack quack.
Here's a good duck joke for you.
[QUACKING]
Why did the duck fly south?
MR. QUACKMORE: Eh, I don't know.
PHOEBE: Because it was too far to walk.
[QUACKING LAUGHTER]
MR. QUACKMORE: I don't get it.
Hey, let's watch "Waddle with Ducks."
ELMO: Welcome to "Waddle with Ducks."
[SINGING] Waddle waddle waddle, quack quack quack.
Waddle waddle waddle, quack quack quack.
Everybody now.
MRS. QUACKMORE: Ooh, it's interactive.
THE QUACKMORES: [SINGING] Waddle waddle waddle,
quack quack quack.
MR. QUACKMORE: Hey, quick.
The "Quack Cooking Show" is on,
PHOEBE: We don't know anything about cooking.
COOKIE MONSTER: Me got this.
ELMO: Ah.
COOKIE MONSTER: Quackety quack.
Today me, Cookie Duck, will show you
how to make cookie-- oh, sorry-- cracker surprise.
First, cover eyes.
Then eat cookies-- me mean crackers.
[MUNCHING]
Surprise.
They all gone.
Quackety quack.
MRS. QUACKMORE: Oh.
I'll have to try that recipe when I get back to the pond.
MR. QUACKMORE: Hey, quit quacking.
It's time for "Real Ducks."
ELMO: Elmo loves to be a real duck.
PHOEBE: Quack quack quack.
Let's swim this way.
ELMO: Quack quack.
MRS. QUACKMORE: Look, real ducks just like us.
MR. QUACKMORE: Hey, I love reality television.
Best episode ever.
Hey, let's see the end of "Ducks Got Quacks."
PHOEBE: Duck went into a restaurant and--
MRS. QUACKMORE: No.
PHOEBE: --paid the bill.
MRS. QUACKMORE: "Waddle with Ducks."
MR. QUACKMORE: What?
PHOEBE: Oh.
ELMO: Oh, watch out.
ELMO AND PHOEBE: [SINGING] Waddle
waddle waddle, quack quack quack.
MR. QUACKMORE: No, no, no. "Real Ducks."
PHOEBE: Oh, ooh.
ELMO: Oh, "Real Ducks."
Elmo loves to be a real duck.
MRS. QUACKMORE: No, "Ducks Got Quacks."
ELMO: Oh.
Oh, that's you.
PHOEBE: When do ducks wake up?
MR. QUACKMORE: No, "Waddle with Ducks."
MRS. QUACKMORE: No.
ELMO: Oh, oh.
Waddle with-- OK.
ELMO AND PHOEBE: [SINGING] Waddle
waddle waddle, quack quack quack.
Waddle waddle waddle, quack quack quack.
MR. QUACKMORE: No, no, no, "Real Ducks."
PHOEBE: Oh.
What-- oh.
ELMO: Aw, Elmo can't keep up.
PHOEBE: Me neither.
You've got to just choose one show.
ELMO: Please.
MRS. QUACKMORE: Oh, no.
What are we going to do?
MR. QUACKMORE: Well, we want to watch all the shows
at the same time.
MRS. QUACKMORE: We do.
ELMO: OK.
Ah, Phoebe and Elmo are going to need a lot more ducks for that.
PHOEBE: Yeah.
[QUACKING]
[GASP]
Fuzzah webbah.
That gives me another monster idea.
We can swap.
Problem solved.
You mean we can be on TV?
[CHEERING]
MRS. QUACKMORE: A one, a two, a one, two, three, four.
THE QUACKMORES: Waddle waddle waddle,
quack quack quack, swim swim swim.
[QUACKING LAUGHTER]
FURGUS: TV's fixed.
MRS. QUACKMORE: Thanks Mr. Fuzz, but we don't want to watch TV,
do we?
MR. QUACKMORE: No we don't.
FUNELLA AND FURGUS: What?
MR. QUACKMORE: No.
We want to be on TV.
FURGUS: Oh.
OK.
MR. QUACKMORE: Five, six, seven--
FURGUS: Here we go.
MR. QUACKMORE: --eight.
THE QUACKMORES: Waddle waddle waddle, quack quack quack.
[LAUGHTER]
FURGUS: Have you seen this episode?
FUNELLA: It's my favorite.
Hey, look.
Backstroke.
[GRUNTING]
MRS. QUACKMORE: Oh yeah.
FUNELLA: [SINGING] You really can't be going.
Oh, say it isn't true.
FUNELLA AND FURGUS: The Furchester
will never be as furry without you.
ELMO AND PHOEBE: So--
FUNELLA AND FURGUS: Don't check out.
ELMO AND PHOEBE: Don't check out.
FUNELLA AND FURGUS: Please please please please don't go.
ELMO AND PHOEBE: Don't check out.
COOKIE MONSTER: Don't check out.
ALL: No no no no no no no.
Please please don't check out.
TEA TIME MONSTERS: Ugga wugga tea time.
Ugga wugga clink.
Ugga wugga tea time.
Ugga wugga clink.
[CHEERING]
ALL: [SINGING] Farewell from the Furchester Hotel.