-One, I'm so happy you're here.
Two, I'm so happy "SNL" is back
after a four-week break. -Yeah.
-You had the holidays.
You went to London with your husband, Conner,
A dear friend of ours at the show. Used to work here,
an incredibly funny guy. Did you guys have fun in London?
-We had such a nice time. Yeah, I mean, I'm from Arizona.
So most of our vacations -- -Whoo!
-Oh, and hello.
But most of our vacations was like,
"We're going to drive across Utah."
[ Laughter ] You know?
-Yeah. -And so, yeah, we went --
Now we have TV money. And we went to London.
[ Laughter ]
And it was so beautiful and so nice.
-I mean, was it romantic?
Did you have moments of romance with Conner?
-You know, how can you not? -Yeah.
[ Laughter ] -But, yeah.
I mean, we had such a lovely -- We went on walks.
We sat by fireplaces.
We went on this walk in, like, a beautiful garden.
There were swans everywhere, and, like, beautiful birds
flying all around.
And I will say that, like, at the end of the walk,
I was like, "There's a bunch
of bird [ bleep ] on your shoulder, bud."
[ Laughter ]
And he did have like a big drizzle
of bird dump on his shoulder. -Yeah.
-And I was like, "Oh, okay, I definitely probably have
something in my purse that can, like, help us get this off."
And the only thing that I could find to scrape the bird poop
off of him was an old packet of diarrhea medicine from me.
[ Laughter ]
Kind of a beautiful full-circle moment.
-Yeah. -And really, like,
a romantic tale for our kids.
But, yeah, I did have to take my old diarrhea medicine
and scrape the dump off my husband.
-Just like -- Just like London. Everything you'd want.
-Yes, it's known for being fancy.
[ Laughter ] -You spent your summer,
second summer a row, in Portland
working on your fantastic show "Shrill."
Have you enjoyed your time in Portland?
-Oh, I really love it there. -Yeah.
-It's so dang nice. And, yeah,
I love shooting there. It's just the damn best.
-And it's good people, right?
Like, there's really good crews out there
because of "Portlandia." And --
-Yeah. Yeah, we share a crew, "Doc Now!"
-"Documentary Now!", yeah. -And "Portlandia."
And "Shrill." We all use the same damn crew.
It's so nice. -Your --
There's an episode where you're introducing your boyfriend
to your family in this season of "Shrill."
-Yeah. -Conner, your husband,
does not play your boyfriend. But he's in the show.
-Yeah, he plays sort of my enemy.
-Yeah, I'm very -- It's like role play.
-Rrrrrrr! [ Laughter ]
This is all about how horny I am.
And how much I get nasty. -Yes.
"Even bird [bleep] cannot tamp down my affections!"
-[ Panting ] -You -- but in real life,
what was it like when you introduced Conner
to your family? -Yeah, it was -- it was --
It was perfect. Of course. -Yeah.
-No, it was -- It was bad. [ Laughter ]
Only in that at the time,
Conner had this car, which for me, was very fancy.
-This is Chicago, yes. -In Chicago, yeah.
And this car, I think it cost under $300.
-Right. Hard to get a car for under $300.
-That's what you think. [ Laughter ]
And so my mom came to town. And we were going to dinner.
And I was like, "Actually,
my boyfriend's going to pick us up."
And the car didn't have a muffler,
which means that it sounds like a rocket ship going to the moon.
Just a full, like, aaaaarnh!
The whole way there.
And then the car also didn't run when it rained.
-Okay. -So, you know,
classic car stuff.
-This one's not a rainer. -Yeah.
-"I'm going to get you in this car for $299.
But you don't want to take it out when it's wet."
-Also, it's like, probably shouldn't be
riding in the vehicle that can't be a little wet.
-Yeah.
-But basically, then after dinner, it started to rain.
But we were already in the car.
And so we were like, "We got to just try and make it here."
But it started to rain so hard
that we couldn't see out the windows.
And the windshield wipers didn't work.
So I was in the front seat. And he was in the driver's seat.
And we both were holding the windshield wipers
trying to just, like, get to the end.
And my mom was in the back.
And I was like, "He's nice, right?"
[ Laughter ]
-You've been out doing a lot of press, you were telling me,
the last two weeks promoting "Shrill."
-Oh, yeah, yeah. -Nice to have the time off
from "SNL." You were back in Chicago.
-Yeah. -And you were doing an event.
-Yeah, it was kind of like a live radio show.
So there were lots of kids in the audience,
which was kind of fun. -Yeah.
-And, you know, I definitely realized, like,
"This is not my target audience," at a certain point.
Because I was like, doing my best to, like, keep it fun.
And I definitely, like, zeroed in on, like,
a fat little boy dead asleep on his mom.
-Yeah. Like, toddler? -No, I -- I would put him at,
like, a solid 11 years old. [ Laughter ]
And you got to imagine, like, an Augustus Gloop.
-Yeah, yeah. [ Laughter ]
-A nice little sack of circles,
like, just absolutely dead asleep,
you know? -Uh-huh.
-And so that kind of put me in my head,
But I was like, "Barrel through. You've put this boy to sleep."
And -- and then, I'm not kidding,
I looked over and there was a second fat little Chicago boy
dead asleep in the audience. [ Laughter ]
And so now I got two Gloops kind of sleeping through my stuff.
And I hate to tell you this, but there was a third little boy.
-There was a third? It does -- these things
do happen in threes, yes. -And I was like,
"Am I, like, the pied piper who can put fat boys to sleep?"
[ Laughter ] Or what? I don't know.
But it shook me deeply. So I need this pretty bad.
[ Laughter ] -There you go.
[ Cheers and applause ]