-There was stunning news in the worlds of politics
and media today when Fox News announced
that they were abruptly cutting ties
with their top rated host, Tucker Carlson,
less than a week after a massive settlement
over the Dominion Voting Systems defamation lawsuit.
For more on this, it's time for a closer look.
♪♪
We've been doing this show for just over nine years.
Eight of those have been dominated
by the nonstop insanity of the Trump era.
So I didn't think anything could shock me anymore.
Then today, this happened.
-Big breaking news in media, big business story,
big media story, big political story.
Fox News announcing in the last hour Tucker Carlson is out
effective immediately.
-Tucker Carlson is out at Fox News?
Oh, my God, does this mean Fox News has gone...
[Echoes] woke? [ Thunder rumbles ]
[ Applause ]
When I heard that news,
I went through all the stages of Tucker's face in one sitting.
First, I was shocked...
...then I was confused...
...then I did the Tucker laugh.
[ Laughs maniacally ]
That's actually closer than you think.
-[ Laughs ]
-But then I had so many questions.
What are we gonna do without Tucker?
Who else is going to tell us when M&Ms are [Bleep] anymore,
you know?
You know, would be really funny, though,
if they replaced him at 8 P.M. with the new green M&M.
That'd be pretty funny.
The decision was apparently so sudden
that according to "The New York Times"...
And the announcement from Fox was so stunning,
even the network's own anchors seemed caught off guard
when they read the official statement on the air today
in what felt like a decree from state television
in some sort of weird cult-like dictatorship.
-We have some news from within our Fox family.
Fox News Media and Tucker Carlson
have mutually agreed to part ways.
Tucker's last show was this past Friday,
and starting tonight, "Fox News Tonight" will air
live at 8 P.M. Eastern.
It will be an interim show with rotating Fox News personalities
until a new host is named.
We want to thank Tucker Carlson for his service
to the network as a host and, prior to that,
as a long term contributor.
-Wow. I've seen more convincing reads
on North Korean state TV.
Tucker didn't even get a farewell show.
Fox really knows how to disappear someone.
I'm shocked they didn't just go with this as their statement --
So you heard there Tucker's last show was Friday, April 21st,
which means -- and this is totally real --
that what I'm about to show you is his final segment
as a Fox News anchor.
-We'll be back.
By the way, the entire episode of "Let Them Eat Bugs,"
not quite as good as pizza, streaming now on Fox Nation.
Use a promo code "Originals" for 30 days free.
And we'll be back on Monday.
-No, you won't.
Turns out even that was a lie.
Truly amazing, though, his last segment on TV
was not a rousing monologue or a grand farewell,
but a reminder to watch a special report,
I guess, about eating bugs,
which apparently is a problem now.
That sounds like how you get fired.
Rupert Murdoch calls you up and says,
[ Australian accent ] "Oi, Tucker, eat bugs,
you [ Bleep ]."
[ Normal voice ] And this is all such a fitting end for Tucker,
because he was always terrified that he'd lose his show
after getting canned at to other cable networks, CNN and MSNBC.
And he was specifically afraid that Donald Trump
would be the one to destroy him.
Which is why Tucker spent so much time spoon-feeding
Trump's bull[Bleep] to his viewers
despite knowing it was all bull[Bleep].
After the coup attempt on January 6th,
Tucker called Trump --
Tucker made the same mistake
everyone else who sucks up to Trump makes.
He thought he could harness Trumpism
and use Trump for his own ends
while remaining completely unscathed.
But ultimately, they all learned the same lesson.
You can't let a tiger loose and not get mauled,
even if it's the biggest,
dumbest looking tiger in the zoo.
Ultimately -- Tiger's not gonna catch me.
Whoa!
Ultimately, Tucker's shtick caught up to him.
His whole game was framing
racist, conspiratorial bull[Bleep]
and in a "just asking questions"-style,
not taking responsibility for anything,
but rather posing a bunch of ludicrous hypotheticals
to scare his audience like this one.
-Curt Schilling wrote a social media post
defending Donald Trump.
And in 2021, that's not allowed.
You could lose your insurance for that.
You could also lose your bank account, your website,
your access to e-mail and social media,
your ability to communicate with the outside world.
And there's nothing you can do about it,
because you can also lose your lawyer.
No legal representation for you.
How long before they cut off your water and electricity,
before UPS won't deliver your packages.
And not to wreck your day, but guess what?
Amazon is now one of America's biggest grocery providers.
Good thing you don't need to eat.
-How long before they cut off your water and electricity,
before UPS won't deliver your packages?
How long until they cancel your favorite TV show
and fire your favorite TV show host?
And what if that TV show host
is a person named Tucker Carlson?
And what if it turns out that you are Tucker Carlson
and you realize mid-monologue
that you're talking about yourself?
What happens to you, then?
Do you go to CNN or MSNBC?
Because if you can't,
because those networks already fired you,
what if you have to go to Newsmax
and share a dressing room with Mike Lindell
and he uses pillows even though they're filled
with bricks and smell like urine?
What if Newsmax refuses to hire you
and Amazon refuses to deliver packages and grocery stores
refuse to sell you food in order to survive?
You have no choice but to...
-Eat bugs.
-Now --
[ Laughter ]
As we mentioned --
[ Laughter and applause ]
Tucker's abrupt ouster
comes less than a week after Fox agreed
to pay a whopping $787 million in the defamation case
brought by Dominion Voting Systems
for pushing Trump's deranged election lies.
And they did that because they were terrified
of losing Trump's audience.
Now, personally, I would have loved to see a trial,
mainly because it would have been so funny
and cathartic to see Fox hosts like Tucker
or Jeanine Pirro on the stand.
"The election wasn't rigged. I was just lying for ratings."
"Objection, Your Honor.
The Bible the witness swore in on
is actually a box of wine with Bible written on it in Sharpie."
But that would have been bad for Fox,
and Fox knew that.
Rupert Murdoch himself
would have been forced to testify.
And based on how the deposition went,
Murdoch knew that would not go well.
He pointed a finger at the lawyer
who had questioned him for Dominion and said,
"I think he would strongly disagree with that."
To which the Dominion lawyer replied,
"Indeed, I do."
Yeah, I would guess the last thing a Fox employee
wants to see pointing their way is Rupert Murdoch's finger,
a.k.a. the Reaper's scythe.
That's probably how Tucker got fired.
Rupert just pointed a finger at him
and Tucker said, "I'll get my stuff."
Rupert Murdoch has never used that bony appendage
for the purposes of delivering good news.
[ Australian accent ] "Oi, you there? That's right. You.
You know what you're about to get?
An edible arrangement
that says, 'Thanks for all the hard work.'
Did you put the beetles in the honeydew?
Oh, good, good. Very good.
Eat bugs, you [Bleep]."
[ Normal voice ] So --
[ Laughter ]
So this case exposed the grimy inner workings
of the right's leading propaganda network,
like the fact that they all thought Trump sucked
and thought his cronies were morons and weirdos.
As you'll recall, one court filing in the case revealed
that Tucker had said of Trump...
Among other things.
It's so funny to me that Tucker
talks like a divorcée from a soap opera.
"I'm so glad Aleister died in that skiing accident.
I hate him passionately."
"Hello, darling, it's me. I'm back from the dead.
And now I'm...
[Echoes] woke." [ Thunder rumbles ]
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
But no matter how much they hated him privately,
Tucker and his buddies know they have to keep
Trump's base on their side,
which is why they kept pretending to buddy up to Trump,
which is why he was so poetic that one of Tucker's last acts
as a Fox host was flying down to Florida
to grovel in an interview with Trump,
where he pretended to be fascinated
by every word Trump uttered.
Watch Tucker's facial expressions
in each of these exchanges with Trump.
-I said, "Abdul, if you do anything,
you're gonna get hit really hard."
Literally, I even -- he said,
"But sir, why? Why?"
I wouldn't say it was a long preparation,
but I did want to talk about nuclear,
because I consider it to be the single greatest threat
the world has.
A beautiful female interpreter.
She was very beautiful.
Today, if you say it,
they'll say, "This is terrible. You're not allowed to say that."
But she was very professional.
She spoke every word for him.
[ Laughter ]
-He looks like a 12 year old listening to his older brother
talking about touching a female breast for the first time.
"Yeah, it was over the sweater,
but still it definitely counted."
[ Laughter ]
"That's so cool. You're my idol."
You can see it dawning on Tucker's in real time.
That's the moment he thought to himself,
"Oh, I'm gonna get fired."
In fact, Tucker's prophecy
that Trump was a destroyer seems to be coming true,
because as Tucker loses his job,
Trump is ascendant in the polls over his likely main rival,
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis.
DeSantis has been sinking in the polls,
and instead of getting tougher in response,
he seems to be getting more nervous
and looking pretty shaky.
-What will Ron DeSantis do? He is trailing in the polls,
struggling with endorsements, and Trump clearly smells blood.
-According to a new "Wall Street Journal" poll
taken last week, Trump pulled in 48% of the support
among likely Republican primary voters.
The next person closest to him is DeSantis,
who is 24 points behind.
-Governor, polls show you falling behind Trump.
Any thoughts on that?
-I'm not a candidate.
So we'll see if and when that changes.
-Holy -- Holy [Bleep], look at his face.
[ Laughter ]
He's acting like his mom just found weed in his sock drawer.
"Ronald, is this your marijuana?
That would certainly explain
why you've been eating pudding with your hands."
Guys, there was a story about Ron DeSantis
eating pudding with his hands.
And we know it wasn't a big story,
but we're going to talk about it a lot on the show
over the next few months.
We'd love if you caught up.
[ Laughter ]
Guy who ate pudding with his hands
thinks he should be president.
Was just sitting there one day
and was like, "You know, who would make a good president?
I think I would."
[ Laughter ]
This dude is supposed to be the great Republican savior.
He's stammering more than Cousin Greg.
"Uh, I am not, uh,
as of this hereby moment, uh, a candidate as such.
And, um, we shall see, uh, if and when,
upon consideration of various, uh, factors,
if that should change in any, uh, ch-- forthwith."
It is too bad we won't get another
Tucker-DeSantis interview.
They could have just made these faces back and forth
with each other.
Tucker's ouster is obviously a stunning development
in the world of politics and media.
But it was yet again another illustration of the core problem
at the heart of GOP politics.
They all try to suck up to Trump and harness Trumpism
for profit or political gain,
and in the end, they all get burned.
In Tucker's case, he debased himself in service of Trump,
and it didn't work.
All he'll ever be remembered for
is devoting an entire segment
to a piece of candy of which Tucker said...
-She's very beautiful.
-This has been a closer look.
♪♪