Welcome to the Salty Spitoon.
- How tough are ya? - How tough am I?
Ow!
- Wow. - Got anymore tattoos?
Uh. That won’t be necessary. Go ahead.
Thanks. See ya inside, SpongeBob!
- How tough are ya? - How tough am I?
Let me see.
I may have something that'll work for you.
Here we go.
Cotton swabs.
Cotton balls.
Here, try this on for size, Hercules.
[grunting]
[screaming]
- How am I doing? - Pathetic.
Hi, Patrick. How do you like my new look?
[screaming]
I’ll save you!
[grunting]
Patrick! What...are...you...doing?
I’m saving you from that brain eating alien that’s attacking your…head!
I don’t have time for this!
I've got to go pick a fight with a muscular stranger.
It’s the only way of getting into the Salty Spitoon!
No SpongeBob, you can't. It's too dangerous.
I've got no choice.
I have a suggestion.
Why not fake a fight?
Hey, that’s not a bad idea.
You could call me a couple of bad names.
We rumble. Next thing you know you’re in the Salty Spitoon.
I guess I got nothing to lose.
Let’s do it!
You got a new bottle of ketchup?
- Sure. - It’s on!
[grunting]
[straining]
[gasping]
[screaming]
If I could just run this under some hot water.
Get outta here.
This place is too tough for you, little man.
Too tough for me.
That's downright ridiculous.
I'll have you know, I stubbed my toe last week
while watering my spice garden, and I only cried for 20 minutes.
Listen, kid. I think you’d be more comfortable over at that place.
Weenie Hut Jr’s!
Are you saying I belong at Weenie Hut Jr’s?
Uh oh, no. Sorry. I was actually pointing to the place next to it.
Super Weenie Hutt Jr’s!
Yeah. Unless you think you're tough enough to fight me.
[gasping]
[laughing]
Walk on your back.
[grunting]
And don’t forget, always be hydrating.
That means drink plenty of water.
Couldn’t get in, huh?
What you need is a tough hair do.
No one gets into the Double S without a tough hair do.
I disagree. I saw a guy going in there and he was bald.
I saw that guy. He wasn't bald.
He had a shaved head. Shaved. That’s a hair do. Case closed.
Hey, where'd he go?
I believe he said something about going to the wig store.
Ah ha! Check and mate.
You’re going down, Tubby!
Tubby?
[growling]
Nobody calls me Tubby!
[grunting]
Wait, Patrick. You’re supposed to let me win. Remember?
Oh yeah.
[grunting]
No, please wait.
[grunting]
[squealing]
[grunting]
[groaning]
No. Please.
Have mercy!
[grunting]
Oh!
Whoa. You destroyed that guy without even touching him.
I did?
I never thought I'd say this, but go ahead in.
Really? I can go in?
Oh, my gosh! I never thought this moment would come!
I, Sponge Bob Squarepants, am tough enough to get into the Salty Spitoon!
This is the happiest day of my life!
[sirens ringing]
Sandy…
Oh. What happened?
You ran inside and slipped on an ice cube.
Fight! Fight!
- I don’t see anyone fighting. Do you? - There talking about us. We’re fighting!
Well, don’t mind if I do.
[grunting]
Fight. Fight. Fight. Fight.
[grunting]
This is embarrassing.
[grunting]
What's going on here? Well?
SpongeBob and I were fighting.
[gasping]
Fighting?
Well, I can't believe I'm saying this,
but SpongeBob Squarepants, I hereby
sentence you and your friend to detention.
What do you want?
I'd like to gain entrance to your social club, please.
I believe my hairdo is in order.
[laughing]
Well, it looks like your gluteus maximus has made a full recovery.
- My what has a what now? - Your butt’s all better.
It's really quite amazing.
It took 20 hours to put it all back together.
We actually ran out of Staples and had to use a glue stick.
Yep, you’re a lucky, lucky, lucky, lucky, lucky luck, boy.
But from now on, I’d like you to be more careful.
One more injury like that
and you could wind up like that poor creature there, in the iron butt.
Oh man it itches.
[groaning]
Ooh!
[groaning]
[grunting]
SpongeBob! SpongeBob!
[grunting]
[screaming]
Hey, look what I can make it, do.
[laughing]
Yeah. Hey, what about that one?
Huh. You know, I don’t remember getting this one.
Can you make it dance?
Well, here, let me try.
[grunting]
[humming]
Hmm. Wait a minute. Go ahead in.
Yeah, sure, Wretch. Thanks.
Nice try, little man.