- Hey, Carol.
So Halloween's gonna be weird this year, right?
Hey girl, have you decided
what you're gonna do about Halloween?
Hey.
Are you guys, like, doing Halloween?
Chris down the street got a T-shirt cannon,
but instead of T-shirts, it's going to be like lollipops.
A little stabby, but super fun idea.
You know what?
We're just gonna let them go trick or treating.
Just make sure they have masks on and guess what?
I'm gonna borrow that little reachy-grabby thing
from my in-laws, like, so, you know,
the thing they use in the grocery store.
That way can just like, boop,
reach in and they're not even touching anything.
Brilliant.
Hazmat suits, right?
I mean, they just mask up
and then get all the candy they want.
They could be essential workers, right?
Yeah, we have no idea what we're gonna do.
But like, they're all in masks, right?
Can you believe it?
Halloween is finally on a Saturday,
Boom! Pandemic.
Okay, okay, okay.
Okay, so we have the kids stand in the front yard,
parade of cars go by.
They throw candy at our kids.
Yes, I hear you dangerous, yes, but 2020.
I know, it's like the kids love Halloween so much,
and everything's been just like ripped from them,
like school and summer camp and sports and school again.
They were onto something in the '80s.
You know, these masks, not well ventilated,
but perfect for right now, right?
Rambo.
You know what?
I'm just gonna load up on candy,
no trick or treating, just boom,
put it in their bowls.
Let's do this.
Just a few friends, backyard,
we make it super special, like we hide candy everywhere.
And then we'll do like Easter-egg-hunt-meets-Halloween.
So just like candy and fun and.
So I think what we're gonna do is put a big bowl
at the end of the driveway and a table.
And then we'll just like wave at everybody
from the front porch.
That way we see if like little Jimmy down the street
tries to steal our bowl again,
just like, ugh get him from a far, but that's okay.
But we've got eyes on it and we can still see 'em.
Then that way we're good.
Hear me out, instead of candy, we hand out hand sanitizer.
But you know what?
Bright side it's just one year.
It's just this one year, next year we're back at it, right?
Inflatable costumes for everyone.
I mean, you cannot get too close, but like right?
It's, it breathes really well too.
So yeah, all the costumes are just gonna have masks anyway,
so just like tons of sanitizer.
Sanitize, candy, sanitize, candy.
Mommy eats candy, more sanitizer.
I mean, we're fine, right? It's fine.
You know what, guys, scratch that.
It's gonna be just us, just the four of us.
We just watch "Hocus Pocus" on repeat.
Just like argh with the candy, just us, special.
It's fine. It's fine.
We're gonna make it special.
I mean, we're never gonna forget this Halloween, right.
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
Witches broom.
Bloated witch, six feet.
Right? Am I right?
Remember last year when we were pushing, like, granola bars
and raisins for Halloween?
Now, it's like, I don't know, it's Tuesday,
it's not even Halloween.
You want a full size candy bar?
Take it kid, I don't even care.
I mean, I'm gonna have one right now.
Trick or treat!
You are such a good listener.
Thank you for listening.
What do we do about Halloween?
Just tell me.
And what do you wanna be for Halloween?
Do you want to be a meth-gator or a murder hornet?
No?
Scene.
So Halloween is our favorite.
Everything is our favorite, I have to say,
but Halloween, I think, will be the first
big kind of situation
that our kids are gonna be real, real mad about.
We have not figured out what we're gonna do.
If we're gonna let them do some sort of, like,
social distance Halloween thing,
or just try to make something special for them here
or get a tee shirt cannon and launch lollipops at them.
I have not figured out what we're gonna do,
but what I'm pitching is maybe we just rain check it all.
Next year, 2021, we do like a master,
like July 4th, Easter, Halloween,
just big party.
And we just like invite everybody.
And then just like one big party.
And it's just like candy and presents and eggs.
'Cause everybody loves an Easter egg hunt.
Um, yeah, so no clue.
What are you guys gonna do?
What are we doing about Halloween?
No, seriously?
Like what are we,
what are we gonna do?
It's gonna be fine. Right?
It'll be fine. It'll be fine.
We'll just, it'll be fine, or not.
Kids, I have your costume.