*Haaaa*
Mark: Bonjour. *Said in a poor French accent*
Mark: Welcome to Markiplier makes art.
Mark: Fine art, the finest art that you have ever seen, that you will ever know! Fine art, the finest art that you have ever seen, that you will ever know
Fine art, the finest art that you have ever seen, that you will ever know
Have you ever thought to yourself when you are out The Louvre on a summer's evening?
-BLOOT- And then you go, and you see the Mona Lisa and then you- no.
Drifting into German
and then you see the Mona Lisa, and it calls to you
And you know that in your blood you feel it in your heart a little bit of mmmm yes
That's ART
And so today we are going to make you the finest art that you have ever seen
before in your life
It's troo
But I cannot do it alone
No. NON
Nyuh
Auck no, I need my friends
introducing--oh
introducing Tyler
the naked David statue by a Leonardo Da Vinci
Scheid. Notice a bear with his tiny penis oh, so small
Small, but this- ah- was an artistic choice! David probably hung like horse.
But this time NO. this one very small
-mwah-
You're welcome, and this time I would like to introduce Ethan.
OHHONHONHON
UNE BAGUETTE EIFFEL TOWER
HONHONHONHONHONHONHON
(Ethan) honhonhon
He has a crippling disease. He cannot stop HON-ing (Ethan hon-ing in the background)
-Ethan inhales-
HON
Enchante.
r u ok
HAVE THE HONS BEEN CURED?
It's a HON miracle! Alright, anyway. God, I gotta stop going Scottish.
Ethan: Scottish? You were German that entire time.
Mark: Noooo
What are you talking about?(X2) It's not German!
Bonjour!
Tyler: Bonjour.
Ethan: MMMMMMMmmmm.
Mark: So here is how it will go.
Ahh yes -sniffs-
Can you smell the art in the air? (Ethan sniffs the air. Add some hand actions, and bingo)
Oh hi Amy (Ethan now sniffs the canvas. Oh boy!)
you are my MUSE
You are the inspiration of all my ART
I said BONJOUR to you
And then I feel it in my soul
Ethan: Do you not feel the same when you look at me, do you not feel the bonjour in your heart??
Mark: NOOOO Ethan: Ohhhn, (???) Mueeh
Mark: Nooo way
Maybe David over there with his tiny penis
Ethan: wowow
HONHONHON
Mark: HOW MANY TIME WHEN YOU FIRST CAME OUT HERE YOU SAID SMALL COCK????
THAT WASN'T THIS JOKE
THIS IS ALSO JOKE, WHAT YOU SAY
-lot of unintelligible arguing-
-ethan looks so done-
I am not admitting to anything
I think he admitting
alright what r we doing
WHAT? OH, YEAH I FORGOT
welcome back
Ignore the technical difficulties that we just..solved
Today we are going to make.........self portraits
Self-por-insert throat catchy sound here-traits
Ethan: no incorrect Mark: NO THAT IS WRONG
WE ARE GOING TO MAKE PORTRAITS
OF FRIENDS
HONHON!!
We are going to fight for the right to paint each other
and then when we paint each other
we will try to be acc--what?
WHAT IS WRONG????
IT'S ACCURATE NOW
IT'S TROO TO FRANDS
DON'T MIND THESE ASSHOLES
we fight for right to paint each other
WHO PICK WHO? I DUNNO
BUT MAYBE WE KNOW SOON ENOUGH
SO WHEN YOU PICK WHO WHO
THE OTHER, THEY PICK EACH OTHER
and it'll be fun
for we in FRANCE
Rochambeau
we do rock pape up HERE Rochambeau
ready? yis
w-h-uh wait
ROOMBA
UN--ZOOMBA
GROOMBA??
BOOP!
OH YOU WIN!!
I will paint--Mark.
Ahhhh
Excellent choice
I will paint...myself
No. No. Then I paint you
No it was joke.
You have to paint him, he has to paint me
I paint you you paint him
I can't paint mys---no, he paint me
We have brush! I paint YOU??
yes
He paint me Hey Tyler
Tyler paint you
WE SHOULD GET PAINTING OUR SPLOOSHERS
SPLAT
OHHH
That worked out better than I ever could have hoped.
AH! Where is..the black?
I have it in my hand of fuckhole
take it
EAT DICKS
i'm sorry i don't know where the anger came from
we have our paint
and we have our...muses
SO NOW, WE PAINT
GO!!!
...............Who am I painting again?
YOU PAINT ME
fuckboi mmmm
i've never painted before in my life
You've never painted??? Never
Not even finger paint? Nuuuuh
well mebbe, i dunno, we were poor children
Growing up in the streets
You didn't have fingers
YOU HAD---AHA, LOOK AT MR. RICH MAN HERE
HE HAD FINGERS GROWING UP
WELL FUCK ME
you, you know what art is about?
do you know what the definition of art is??
if someone asked you hey mr. encyclopedia
what's art? what would you say to them
cuz I know the answer but I wanna see if you know it
..who're you talking to?
I'm talking to you Oh
I do, but, you know, let's compare notes after
you say what you think art is
well art is something that--you know,
is visual but--
it comes from the inside
not here but
here
through your nose? no
anyway -mark wheezes-
Amy: do you guys wanna talk about what you're doing specifically right now?
I've no idea.
it is a work in progress
well, let's just leave it at that.
I'm making chocolate milk
ah ooh ah ooh eh ooh eh ooh
eh ooh ooh Amy: what technique is that
It's...the fumato
which--uhuhuhuh the the
Leonardo da Vinci
no....who made the mona lisa
leonardo dicaprio
THAT'S IT
he use the fumato technique
I wonder what the first color was
right??
That....has blown my mind!!!!
RIGHT??? WHAT WAS FIRST COLOR????
BLACK??? WHITE?
What was the first color that they recognized as...color???
Color is uh just a social construct
It's true. It is made up
HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT MY BLUE ISN'T THE SAME AS YOUR BLEU???
WELL THAT'S THE THING IS THAT OUR BLEUS ARE NOT THE SAME!!!
*X-files theme plays*
WHOOOOOOAAAAA
-whispers- fuck
ETHAN!!!
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU??
IT'S FINE IT'S FINE IT'S FINE TYLER DON'T LOOK OVER HERE
Tyler: excuse me mark I don't wanna--- Ethan: DON'T LOOK OVER HERE
I don't wanna knock over something like ethan
-Ethan screams-
Oh...GOD
DON'T LOOK TYLER I already saw it..
-Ethan laughs manically-
That looks like bob
nonono don't look
-ethan wheezes- You're done??
-ethan still wheeze laughing- YOU SEE THAT? Mark: YEAH I see that
-ethan crying inside-
that's some deep fuckin' shit right there
fUCK I'm a genius
-gasps- fUCK
god dammit
I keep doing that
I keep scooping paint on my brush and I keep forgetting that it's not digital and it doesn't go into your brush and it's REAL here
you forgot that it's real paint?
I FORGOT
I FORGOT HOW REAL PAINT WORKS
OKAY? IT'S NOT MY FAULT....
I gotta make some drastic changes
I think I'm just about done, honestly
Yeah? Alright I'll finish up soon then
YEAH good enough i think i'm done
Tyler, are you done?
not quite
How long?
not much longer
We're gonna each take turns doing a big reveal
of our amazing pieces of art
and then we're going to have them judged
based on the criteria
of accuracy to the subject,
overall artistic goodness,
and then which one would the judges actually pay money for?
OKAY OH HE'S DONE
oh he's done
and now we
will take turns revealing our art
and you will see
oh, you will see
Tyler do you wanna go first cuz your art is so fresh?
y--no
I think it should be the order of completion, personally
-marky stink face-
WE WILL DO IT TYLER FIRST, JUST BECAUSE
I wanted to piss him off
don't worry about a thing
nothing happened...lol
...performance art
Mark: that's better art than we have Ethan: different kind of art
but still art all the same
ah...I love the chlorox
ahh
ze art
has revealed
here we have mark
OUTDOORS
on vacation and this is what mark would look like if he actually took a vacation
yes, wearing his own merch
wearing Wade's merch, actually
Wade's merch but with an M. Yes
So he's outdoors, you can see Chica running off to the side
as Mark is staring off into the distance
on a..nice wispy day with nice wisps
truly dead eyes
uh, busy thinking about
making videos.
ohh.
Even on vacation. Even on vacation I never stop
Are you ready for mine?
Ah -mwah- no one is rrready.
OHH.
It is our favorite BLEU BOI.
Accurate!!
Accurate..
Acne..... Delicious blueberry face
Cute You want to pinch the cheeks
Isn't it me?
OHHONHON
And then your hair
Got it pretty accurately
Your dreams and aspirations Yes
For a diamond play button uh huh
And you're at the beach coz you moved to LA! I love the beach!
Mm. I love it!
And you're a ghost because you're dead
Ah just like my channel
Y-yeah
-EXCITED AGREEMENT-
Uh and last but not least we have Tyler here
he looks like bob
if you take a peek, something happened here
when it fell on the floor
that is...a toenail
there's a lot of uh...there's a lot of..
happenstance *laughing* happening here
-laugh-
when she fell
the toenail...
the toenail happened to get there and I thought you know what,
put your face right up there, put your face right up there
oh you cover me, that's fine
parfeect
We have the toenail on there and I just---I couldn't--
dare to touch that..
M: when...when fate smiles upon your art like that E: yes!
you gotta smile back
yeah
you gotta smile
I'm...I'm really curious about your chin selection. Does my chin jut out?
nnno cuz I don't---
OH, yeah Mr. Butt-chin for me, thank you very much
you can't criticize!
yeah it is ACCURATE!
and lips I thought were very good
and uh hair obviously it's not...
like it is now but I..I like the old Tyler
yeah you've changed
changed..
we have our art gallery here
and we're ready to show it to the judges
so if we could have the judges come down
-clap clap clap-
neck's a little small.
it's true.
A: but relative to his body size it's okay K: it's not very...it's not
super thick.
Not as thick as I would like.
Yeah. Could use a thicker neck, but...
Everything else is pretty...pretty accurate
spot on.
So for my painting I went with uh...uh
extreme realism
Like I went super real. HYPER realism, actually
um, so the blue face
uh..the acne, which I wanted to kinda understate
cuz that's not really a reflection of who he is
um the, the hair
um, just whenever I see it, like I'm pretty sure... A: I thought that was a hat.
oh no. no. I think that too.
But it's actually his hair. An overcast day
Well no nevermind it's not. IT'S NOT I LIED
BUT LYING'S PART OF THE EXPERIENCE OK
What is real? Good point.
WHAT IS REAL?
What do you see, how do you know the Ethan that I see isn't the Ethan that you see?
This is my representation of Tyler
He's uh....
He's got the big hair.
That he used to have, that we know him of. He's got a REAL hair.
Is that? or is that just texture
uhhh
Oh over here? No not the toenail, that guy
OH UH...I think that is actual hair
That..might be mine
Um...and then there is.. K: look at this
That might be Marzipan (Kathryn's cat)
That is--there is multiple real hairs on this painting
Uhh I wanted to bring life
Into the painting and I did that with real life elements like hair and the toenail.
Um the toenail was really something that wasn't planned at all, it just happend and I was like
Brilliant x7 this is God's Plan.
The hair, I tried to get swirly birds in it
real swirly coz Tyler's got curly hair
very curly hair
really good texture
a good texture yeah and he's out in the rain.
Why is he in the rain?
what? Why is he in the rain?
because it's raining outside...
-and here Ethan knew he was fucked-
...in this depiction...
Okay. Yeah.
If that's the rain I'm seeing it more as a floating head above a pond.
-what-
I think it's accurate. I think it's beautiful
It's real nice it's stained
YES
THE STAIN OF LIFE AND AGE, IT REPRESENTS HIS TIMELINE
SEE
When it's bigger up here,
that's when he was a child and so he had much more
happiness and uhh, and, and, you know, he had these big dreams
and as he aged, they just slowly...thinned out...until eventually.....
...disappears.
That's sad. That's why it's raining. Yeah. I get it now.
no it's just raining because that happens to be the weather
no that's sad. n--incorrect. he's not smiling.
incorrect. death of the artist.
He's not smiling. You don't get to tell me how to interpret the art
HE'S NOT SMILING but that doesn't mean that he's frowning
it's a neutral pose--- that looks like a smile to me.
the more I look at it the more it looks like a smile.
Listen you can interpret it any way that you want but I'm just saying to you that from the artist himself that made the painting
HE'S NOT SMILING BUT HE'S ALSO NOT FROWNING
HE'S JUST THERE,
But as soon as you abandon the work and open it up to critique, your interpretation is not just yours, this is mine
see now the toenail looks like a tear
he's crying toenails.
alright well...
I think we'll turn it over to the judges, thanks
...they are the judges
I will say, Mark...
took a lot of creative and had a great imagination in creating his
instead of going for realism he went for something just
different.
something that had to come from his mind instead of something that he's just seeing and reimagining.
I think somehow Ethan channeled his, uh, complete chaos inside of him
and put it onto the frame, like
it wasn't YOU, your
hand here, awful
the worst.
A child could do better. Okay.
BUT
YOUR CREATIVE SPIRIT
falling down, toppling over everything,
that's where it lies
And that's where you truly shine. NOT HERE,
but right there.
I think so too.
what
i still think that looks way more like bob than me
okay well...
that is 100% you tyler.
final decisions from the judges, are you ready?
there are three categories
first one is accuracy.
which we are going to give...to Tyler!
yeah!
am I even in shot
for art, the second one is just like, good art skill
good technique exhibited
gonna give that to....Mark!
HEYYYY I did not think that was going to happen
huh. Look at all that skill
and the last one is which we'd pay money for. what would we pay money for?
which goes to...
Ethan!<3
i wouldn't pay a penny
I wouldn't pay anything for that. clearly.
well actually no you could clone your own Kathryn from that.
YOU COULD CLONE YOUR OWN MYSTERY MEMBER OF TEAMIPLIER A: could be any of us
K: really
wait what're you, what do you call that painting are you gonna call it toenail
ooh, title it!
you should title all of yours.
uhhhhhhhhhhh
come back to me.
I call this one
I'm Blue.
a ba dee ba da eef
mmmm
Mark's Day with Chica.
that's nice. yeah.
okay I think I'd call this..
Neutral Feelings
in the Rain.
that Happens to be Happening.
for No Apparent Reason.
It's Just the Weather for that Day.
Overall....
Ethan.
Absolutely.
My heart goes out to all of you
Thank you for supporting me on this endeavor.
I'd like to thank my mom and my dad--ANYWAY,
Tell us who you think should've win-- won in the comments below.
So thank you everybody so much for watching, thank you judges,
for being here and judging fairly.
Yep. If wrongly.
But fairly.
Still unbiased. Yeah.
That's how we are atTteamiplier HQ so thank you everybody so much for watching.
Get ready to not bid on these cuz they're not going up for action because they're going to be hanging in our office till the day we die.
So thanks again everybody for watching and as always we will see you in the next video
BUH BYE byyyyeeee!