The government is shut down,
but the Mueller investigation is still going.
And yesterday we got a surprise look at where it's headed.
A slipup by Paul Manafort's lawyers
has revealed new information
about his contact with a Russian during the Trump campaign.
While Paul Manafort was serving
as Donald Trump's campaign chairman,
the documents revealed that he was in contact
with a man by the name of Konstantin Kilimnik,
an associate U.S. officials believe
is linked to Russian intelligence.
Now, these new details come in a document
that was filed by Manafort's lawyers.
Some lines were blacked out or redacted,
but it turned out because of a clerical error,
they could easily be read
simply by copying and pasting them
into a new document.
Oh, wow.
(laughter)
Okay, now, first of all, don't judge.
It's hard to edit a pdf. I don't know if you guys know how to...
I don't know how to do it.
And second of all, that sure sounds to me
like Donald Trump's campaign manager
was colluding with Russia.
And giving Russians polling data
so that they could target American voters
would have been vital, because you know
Russia didn't have much luck with their own polling.
It was probably them on the phone like,
"Hello, Mr. Williamson.
"This Steve from Glorious Polling Industry.
Who do you want for leader, strong Trump or Clinton woman?"
But the funny part to me is that we found out about this...
the only reason we found out
is because Manafort's lawyers didn't know how to edit a pdf.
That's insane.
So Manafort was colluding with the Kremlin
when he should have been colluding with Kinkos.
That's what he should have been doing.
Moving on to some other news, diamonds.
They're little stones that we strap onto our fingers.
Yeah. Kind of weird when you think about it like that.
That's all they are. But people love them,
and now they can feel good about it, too.
Tiffany will begin revealing the origins of its diamonds
to show they are so-called "conflict-free."
Starting today the region or country of origin
will be displayed alongside a selection of diamond rings.
Customers can ask store employees for information
on all newly sourced stones.
Yeah, that sound amazing. I like this guy.
Basically his new ad campaign is,
"Shop here. We didn't kill any Africans."
I like that. No, and this is good news.
You know, of course, knowing rich people,
I wouldn't be surprised if the new fad
is gonna be getting the most unethically sourced diamonds.
There's gonna be some rich lady who's like,
"Oh, my God, Ashley, did he buy you a diamond?"
Like, "Mm-hmm. It's three karats and six dead Congolese."
"Oh, my God. He's the one!"
And, you know, it's good that they're doing this for diamonds,
but they should really be doing it for all products.
I think we should try.
I mean, diamonds just get the attention
because everyone saw Blood Diamond, right,
which exposed the corrupt exploitation of native laborers
and also Leonardo DiCaprio's horrible South African accent.
Yeah, like, maybe you guys don't remember that,
but we Africans will never forget.
He was like, "We got to go back to those bloody...
"Get the diamonds.
Get the bloody diamonds."
What are you, a drunk Australian?
What are you doing?
They should make a movie with Leonardo DiCaprio
and Forest Whitaker's character from Black Panther,
and they could just do, like, bad accents together.
"All the bloody diamonds."
"And the strength of the 'Blik' Panther. The 'Blik...'"
What the hell is "blik"?
Moving on.
(laughs)
(laughter)
"The 'Blik.'
I give you the strength of the 'Blik' Panther."
Remember when T'Challa was like, "The what?"
Moving on, uh, here's a story
that was big news over in the United Kingdom.
Are you guys fans of Harry Potter?
-(cheering and applause) -Yeah.
So, what happened is that author J.K. Rowling
decided to announce for some random reason
that Hogwarts didn't always have bathrooms
and in the old days, witches and wizards
simply relieved themselves wherever they stood
and vanished the evidence.
Really, J.K.? Wherever they stood?
I mean, it's great that you vanished your dookie,
but first I had to watch you squeeze it out
for, like, eight minutes in the middle of potions class.
I mean, the floor is clean, but my mind is scarred for life.
Also, why don't they just make it disappear in their tummies?
These are wizards. I don't understand.
So, yeah, basically, according to J.K. Rowling,
wizards were just shitting everywhere.
And that doesn't make Harry Potter more appealing to me,
but it does make New York City seem more magical. Yeah.
'Cause I'm like, "I passed a wizard
on the way to work this morning."