>>WELL, THIS HAS BEEN
QUITE AN EVENING.
FULL OF TWISTS AND TURNS.
LIES AND DECEPTIONS, BUT I HAVE FINALLY EXAMINED
ALL THE EVIDENCE AND HAVE DISCOVERED SOME TERRIBLE THINGS.
SOMEONE HERE HAS BEEN KEEPING A SECRET.
>>WHAT?
AND I KNOW EXACTLY, WHO IT IS.
>>[LAUGHS AND CLAPS]
VERY GOOD INSPECTOR.
VERY GOOD INDEED.
SO YOU UNCOVERED THE FACT THAT I HAVE BEEN EMBEZZLING MILLIONS OF
POUNDS FROM MY BUSINESS PARTNER, LORD BRANSTON.
>>WHAT?
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?
>>THE POOR FOOL HAD NO IDEA UNTIL THIS NIGHT.
I MUST CONFESS THAT THOUGH I HAVE BEEN DISCOVERED,
IT BRINGS ME NO SMALL AMOUNT OF JOY THAT HE NOW KNOWS
THAT IT WAS ME ALL ALONG.
[LAUGHS]
>>UM, I DIDN'T KNOW ANY OF THAT.
>>YOU DIDN'T?
>>NO, I WASN'T GOING TO SAY THAT AT ALL.
>>AH, WELL.
DANG IT.
>>SO, WHAT WERE YOU GOING TO SAY INSPECTOR?
>>WELL, I HAVE IRREFUTABLE EVIDENCE THAT SOMEONE HERE
IS NOT WHO THEY SAY THEY ARE.
>>HOW DARE YOU!
>>[LAUGHS AND CLAPS]
VERY GOOD, INSPECTOR.
SO, WE ARRIVE HERE AT LAST.
I KNEW YOU WERE ON TO ME, BUT I MUST CONFESS I DIDN'T
THINK YOU'D FIGURE IT OUT.
I HAVE BEEN POSING FOR YEARS AS THE LONG LOST
SON OF THE ARCHDUKE.
>>WHAT?
YOU MEAN YOU'RE NOT MY SON?
>>NO.
NO, I SIMPLY WANTED YOUR INHERITANCE.
>>I KNEW IT!
I KNEW IT BECAUSE WE HAVE DIFFERENT COLOR EYES.
IT'S THE EYES!
>>BRAVO, INSPECTOR.
VERY IMPRESSIVE.
>>YEAH, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT EITHER.
>>SERIOUSLY?
>>NO.
BUT TO BE FAIR, I PROBABLY WOULD'VE FIGURED
THAT ONE OUT ON MY OWN.
DIFFERENT COLORED EYES IS A DEAD GIVEAWAY.
>>WELL IT SEEMS I GAVE MYSELF AWAY THERE.
AGAIN.
CARRY ON, INSPECTOR.
PLEASE, DON'T LET ME INTERRUPT YOU.
>>WELL, IT APPEARS THAT SOMEONE HERE
HAS BLOOD ON THEIR HANDS.
[GASPS] >>[CLAPS AND LAUGHS]
AH, THIS TIME, WE ARE ON THE SAME
PAGE INSPECTOR.
IT WAS I WHO MURDERED THE MAID.
YES, IRREEFUTABLE EVIDENCE.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, SHE HAD IRREFUTABLE
EVIDENCE THAT I WAS NOT THE ARCHDUKE'S SON.
SO NATURALLY SHE HAD TO BE TAKEN CARE OF.
OF COURSE, I DIDN'T REALIZE I'D BE
REVEALING THAT SECRET MYSELF JUST A FEW HOURS LATER,
BUT AT THE TIME IT SEEMED VERY IMPORTANT TO KEEP HER QUIET.
BRAVO INSPECTOR.
HOWEVER DID YOU TRACE IT BACK TO ME?
>>I DIDN'T.
>>WHAT?
>>YEAH, THERE IS NO WAY I WOULD HAVE FIGURED THAT ONE OUT.
>>INSPECTOR, I'M BEGINNING TO WONDER IF YOU
EVEN KNOW HOW TO DO YOUR JOB.
>>WELL, I DON'T KNOW.
SO FAR YOU'VE CONFESSED TO THREE CRIMES.
>>TOUCHÉ.
>>INSPECTOR, PLEASE.
TELL US WHAT THE ACTUAL SECRET IS.
>>VERY WELL, I HAVE DISCOVERED-
>>THAT I'VE BEEN BRIBEING THE PRIME MINISTER!
>>NO.
>>THAT I IMPERSONATED A PRIEST?
>>NO.
>>THAT I AM NOT DISABLED!
[GASPS] >>DANG IT!
DANG IT!
>>BUT I HAVE FOUND OUT THAT YOU WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE BRIDGE
COLLAPSE EARLIER THIS WEEK THAT CLAIMED A DOZEN LIVES.
>>[GASPS] >>I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.
>>REALLY?
>>NO, IN FACT, I WAS OUT OF THE COUNTRY
WHEN THAT HAPPENED.
COMMITTING A TOTALLY DIFFERENT CRIME.
>>OH WELL, I MUST HAVE MISSED
SOMETHING THEN.
>>AH, INDEED.
LOOKS LIKE THE GAME'S TO ME INSPECTOR.
OH THAT'S A DUD.
>>HM.
WELL I'M STILL ARRESTING YOU FOR THOSE OTHER THINGS.
>>BUT!
OH, RIGHT.
CAREFUL, THESE LEGS HAVE HAD LITTLE USE.
>>I WILL HOLD ONTO THIS, BECAUSE I--
[LAUGHS] ACTUALLY DESTROYED THE BRIDGE.
[LAUGHS] WAIT A MOMENT.
[BUBBLE SOUNDS]