I don't really have anything to say...
i-in here.
Look, I don't spend a lot of time in boardrooms.
Why don't we all adjourn this meeting...
to a place we're a little more familiar with, hmm?
All right, come on. Come on. Everybody in.
Ladies too. Don't be shy. Don't be shy.
Now, I want you all to go in those stalls and close the door.
Come on. Double up if you have to.
Milt, I'd like you in this one right over here.
Jonathan, this better be good. [Chuckles]
Okay, that's right. Go in. Take a seat.
Take a seat and close the doors. Excellent.
Now, at Harvard we call this...
field research.
Milt, will you please tell us what you see in front of you.
A door.
A Malkin door. [Chuckles] And what else?
- Who the hell wrote this? - Come on.
What does it say?
"Milt Malkin... is full of hot air."
Now, that...
is an advertising message.
Not necessarily the message we're trying to get across,
but a message.
You see, the average person spends seven and a half minutes of every day...
staring at the back of a bathroom door.
And we can write anything we want on 18% of those doors sold in America.
Why?
'Cause we make 'em.
That's seven and a half minutes of every day,
three hundred and sixty-five days a year,
for an average life span of 72 years.
That's 3,280 hours of a captive audience...
at a time when they're most open to new ideas.
Because we all know...
that your major life decisions...
aren't made in the boardroom!
No. They're made...
in the bathroom.
[Milt] Yeah!
Jonathan!