(Stitch Voice) "Ohana" means "Family".
(Regular Voice) Aw Stitch, that's very sweet.
(Stitch Voice) "Family" means no one gets left behind or forgotten.
(Regular voice) Yes it does.
(Stitch Voice) "Family" needs 50 bucks.
(Regular voice) Ehhh ok, get out.
What is up everybody!
Ok, I am very interested to see how this video shall turn out.
Number one: Because I am very excited about what we are about to do.
Number two: Because I have no idea what this video WILL look like...
...until I edit it...
...which is both scary and new!
As many of you know, there are a lot of vlogs you can check out online...
... featuring "Storytimes", people telling you stories of their lives.
Coincidentally, I am often referred to as "The Storytime Guy"...
... because of my "Narrating People's Lives" series!
So, I always feel obliged to get in on this!
In this video, I shall be presenting you with THREE Storytimes.
However, I won't be the only one telling the story.
I shall be getting help from all of YOU!
Earlier I asked you all to send in Twitter videos of you saying random nouns...
...verbs, proper nouns, adjectives, and many other things...
...and I shall use them to fill in the pre-written stories I have...
...which have quite a few blanks in them!
Sort of like a... Storytime Madlibs game!
Will they make sense?
Who knows! But, it should definitely be interesting, so... (Laughs)
Let's do this!
First, let's start with a fairly common genre of storytelling vlog you might find on YouTube:
Describing a paranormal experience!
Paranormal STORYTIME!
Did I ever tell you guys about the one time, I ended up--
Twerking
--with a--
dog??
Yeah... it was completely--
B E A UTIFUL.
It happened one day, when I stumbled upon a--
Pizza Hut.
I was feelin' just a little--
naughty
--and I thought it might be interesting to--
crawl
--for a little while and see what might happen!
I fortunately had with me this--
avocado
--which I heard could be used for paranormal communication.
You take it, and you do the following motion...
And then you say...
MY LEG!!!! (Laughs)
I did so, although I must admit, I did it kind of--
swimmingly.
Suddenly, I heard a very... quiet...
BAM!
I'm not gonna lie. That made me just a little--
messy.
This was followed by a sudden and abrupt--
bloop.
I couldn't believe it. But then... I promise you guys...
There it was... a--
DOG!
I saw it open its gigantic maw, and I HEARD it say to me...
"Butts."
So now, I'm--
glistening
-- right? Who wouldn't be??
This is the sort of thing that happens to--
Dan Howell
-- but not me! So naturally, I reacted with a hearty--
YEET!
I just had to--
boogie
-- out of there. And I did.
If there is one thing I can tell you I learned from this whole experience, it's this...
It would have gone better without the anxiety!
Ok, that was fun! I kinda wanna branch away from YouTube storytelling for a sec...
... and return to more classic storytelling.
Let's keep the dark setting, and get a little literary.
Classic STORYTIME!
The year was 1887. The place...
Uranus, or... "ur anus" *wheeze*
A scientist toiled down in his lab for hours on end.
What was his name? Why it was--
(Sung) Alexander Hamilton!
"What could he be devising?" Some villagers wondered.
"What EVILS lurk within his lab??" Others thought.
"I SMELL LIKE BEEF!"
Said one villager, who most others tended to avoid.
None of them could have imagined the truth, for you see...
The doctor was attempting to take a dead--
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLE
-- and bring it back to LIFE.
And on this particularly--
whack
--night, all of their hard work was about to pay off.
During one trial, a bolt of--
chicken nuggets
--STRUCK the lab with a great and LOUD--
(Drum Solo)
The doctor, at first, was--
dry
--but then, saw the eyes of his--
attractive
monster opened.
It rose from its slate and was a sight to behold.
It had two big--
kittens
--and a long--
appendix
--sticking out from its back.
It was also holding a--
baby
--in one hand. The doctor immediately wondered why he had given it that.
But the scariest thing about it... was its enormous--
social anxiety!
It stood--
dramatically
in the room, let out a very confused--
Chicka PLOW!
-- and then saw the doctor.
It began--
yodeling
--over to him.
The doctor was not--
totally tubular.
When the monster was right up close to them, it leaned down...
...pointed a finger at them...
... and from the very core of its being, it said...
"My right BUTT HURTS!"
The doctor immediately reacted by flawlessly pulling off this maneuver!
Crack, snackle, pop!
The monster, stunned, exclaimed...
"I don't know where I'm going in life."
And fell backwards with a great--
WALLOP!
It then--
danced
away.
The doctor, changed by all of this, sat down at their desk, pulled out their notebook, and simply wrote:
"Frickity frick, poop on a stick."
"Someone..."
"...is going to die..."
Nice! Ok, I think we have time for one more!
Another big staple of YouTube is the DRAMA...
... and I've never really taken part in a lot of it...
... so maybe now, this is my chance!
Smacktalk STORYTIME!
You all are not gonna BELIEVE the story I'm about to tell you.
First of all, you know me, right? I'm an incredibly--
Thicc... but, like, with TWO Cs
--guy. I don't try to--
(Sung) SING
--with other people, and I don't like to--
dabble
--in other people's--
gelatin.
Well, lemme tell you, I just had a--
MURDER
--fight with---
HARRY POTTER!
It started when I was at--
FFFFFFARMER'S MARKET
--just hangin' out, doin' my thing, chillin' with my friend.
We were just doin' what we do best:
crying.
Then, all of a sudden, you-know-who shows up, just freakin'--
smiling
--like it's no big deal!
I'm tellin' you, they looked like this!
My friend and I were completely chill... completely--
mysterious.
THEY see us... and--
flutter
-- on over.
My friend, the ever-so-calm one, simply waved and said...
"I shipped Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton before anybody els--"
A little random, I know, but WERE THEY WRONG??
This other LOVELY individual looks at the both of us and says...
"You two are a couple of--
-- banana peels."
I said, "Excuse me??" And they said, "You heard me, you-
mailman.
Sittin' there, lookin' all--
juicyyyy."
(Laughs)
You guys... I was--
(High pitched screeching)
I could NOT believe it. My friend, once again, spoke up, and said:
"By all known laws of aviation there's no way that--"
I told them I should probably handle the talking from here on out.
I then said, "LISTEN, you--"
Flibbidy jibbet!
--I don't really appreciate that--
fierce
--talk around here, and maybe, you should get out of my-
Broadway.
Then they said, "I don't really care HOW you feel..."
"...In fact, I don't give a--
POTATO."
That's when it was ON!
I jumped up and started with a...
(WHOOSH)
And they reacted by delivering a swift...
(SNAP) Owww!
My friend even joined in with a little...
(Dead silence)
In the end, we had to--
BOOP
them until their face turned--
Dodie Yellow
--and they decided to--
frolic
--away.
My friend turned to me happily, and I'll never forget what they told me that day:
"I'M GAY!"
Ok done!! I have no idea what stories I just related to you...
... but I hope they were entertaining! (Laughs)
This is super fun! If you haven't done this kind of game at home...
...I suggest trying it out, because it is always good for a laugh! (Laughs)
And thank you ALL who submitted Twitter videos and helped to tell stories with me today!
All the links to the original videos can be found in the description below...
...and I hoped you enjoyed today's shenanigans!
If you're interested in my previous videos, click over here.
And if you're interested in becoming Featured Fander, click over here!
That's it, and until next time--
WILDCATS! GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME!
--wait, no, that's not right.
Oh yeah!! Take it easy guys, gals, and non-binary pals! PEACE OUT!