♪ ♪ ♪ >> Stephen: LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN, WELCOME BACK TO "A LATE SHOW."
LET'S SAY HELLO TO MR. JON BATISTE.
HELLO, JON.
GOOD TO SEE YOU.
>> Jon: YES, GET INTO THE CHICKEN...
>> Stephen: WHAT'S THE CHICKEN GREASE?
>> Jon: THAT'S WHAT PRINCE WOULD SAY.
THERE'S A CHORD.
♪ ♪ ♪ CHICKET-A-CHECKET-A.
>> Stephen: AND THAT'S CALLED CHICKEN GREASE?
>> Jon: THAT'S RIGHT.
HE WOULD LOOK AT THE BAND WHENEVER HE WANTED TO PLAY THAT
CHORD, AND WE WOULD SAY, "GIVE ME THE CHICKEN GREASE," AND
EVERYBODY... CHICK A-CHICKA-CHICKA.
THAT'S WHAT I LEARNED FROM PRINCE RIGHT THERE.
>> Stephen: THERE IT IS, THERE IT IS.
WILL YOU SHARE WITH US A LITTLE MORE CHICKEN GREASE.
CAN YOU GREASE US?
>> Jon: OH, YEAH, I CAN GREASE IT ALL THE WAY.
♪ ♪ ♪ ( LAUGHS ).
>> Stephen: THE GREASE MASTER HIMSELF, JON BATISTE, EVERYBODY.
THANK YOU, JON.
>> Jon: LET'S GET IT.
YEAH, BABY.
>> Stephen: FOLKS, BECAUSE THE COUNTRY IS STARTING TO OPEN UP,
PEOPLE CAN FINALLY GO PLACES AGAIN.
AND ONE OF THE PLACES THEY WANT TO GO IS OFF THE PLANET.
AND I'LL TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT IN TONIGHT'S EPISODE OF
( ECHO )
SPACE TRAVEL EDITION.
UNTIL NOW, SPACE TRAVEL HAS BEEN LIMITED TO SUPER SMART
ASTRONAUTS AND SUPER BORED BILLIONAIRES.
BUT THAT'S ABOUT TO CHANGE BECAUSE A NEW REALITY SHOW
CALLED "SPACE HERO" WILL FEATURE 24 CONTESTANTS COMPETING FOR THE
GRAND PRIZE OF A TICKET ABOARD A SHIP BOUND FOR THE INTERNATIONAL
SPACE STATION.
AH, YES, THE PERFECT COMBINATION: PEOPLE WHO WILL DO
ANYTHING TO WIN AND A LIMITED SUPPLY OF OXYGEN.
BUT I SHOULD POINT OUT, THE SHOW SAYS THE GRAND PRIZE IS A TICKET
ON A SHIP BOUND FOR THE I.S.S.
IT DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT BEING LET INTO THE VESSEL WHEN
YOU GET THERE.
"HI!
HELLO!
CAN I COME IN?
I'M NOT HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS!
HELLO?" TO FIND A WINNER, "SPACE HERO"
WILL TEST THE PARTICIPANTS' PHYSICAL AND MENTAL STRENGTH IN
PREPARATION FOR SPACEFLIGHT.
IT MAKES TOTAL SENSE.
REALITY-STYLE CHALLENGES ARE THE PERFECT WAY TO PICK AN
ASTRONAUT.
REMEMBER, NASA ONLY CHOSE NEIL ARSTRONG AFTER HE ATE THAT
PICKLED BULL TESTICLE.
AND IT'S ALL SPACE ALL THE TIME, FOLKS, BECAUSE WHEN NOT
COMPETING, CONTESTANTS WILL HAVE TO LIVE TOGETHER IN A "SPACE
VILLAGE."
SO IT'S LIKE REAL WORLD SPACE CAMP.
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THOSE CONFESSIONALS.
"KRISTY IS SUCH A BITCH.
IF SHE USES MY POOP TUBE ONE MORE TIME, I'M GONNA THROW A
GLASS OF DEHYDRATED WINE POWDER NHER FACE!
HER FAT FACE!" SCENE.
( LAUGHTER )
CREATE THIS SHOW, ONE PRODUCER SAID, "LET'S MAKE SPACE COOL.
LET'S MAKE IT SEXY.
LET'S MAKE IT POP CULTURE."
WAIT A SECOND-- SEXY PEOPLE IN SPACE?
WHY. HASN'T. ANY. ONE.
EV-VER. THOUGHT. OF.
DOING. THAT?
( LAUGHTER )
SEXY.
BUT THE SHOW'S GOAL IS NOT JUST TO MAKE SPACE TRAVEL SEXY.
IT'S ALSO TO MAKE IT MORE ACCESSIBLE, AND NOT JUST TO A
FEW THAT ARE SUPER SMART OR SUPER EDUCATED.
GREAT.
SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.
WE'RE GOING TO SHOOT PEOPLE INTO SPACE AFTER MAKING SURE THEY'RE
HOT AND DUMB.
GOOD LUCK ON YOUR RE-ENTRY, CHAD.
REMEMBER TO POINT YOUR TOES WHEN YOU HIT THE WATER.
MAYBE TWO SOCKS.
THE FIRST LAYER MIGHT BURN OFF.
OF COURSE, BLASTING A REALITY SHOW CONTESTANT INTO SPACE ISN'T
THE ONLY POORLY-THOUGHT-OUT SCI-FI NEWS TODAY.
WHICH BRINGS ME TO TONIGHT'S INSTALLMENT OF "DINOSAUR
NEWWWS"!
YOU KNOW HOW RICH TECH BROS KNOW EVERYTHING AND HAVE ONLY GOOD
INTENTIONS AND GOOD IDEAS?
WELL, ONE OF THEM SAYS WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY TO BUILD AN
ACTUAL "JURASSIC PARK."
WOW!
WHAT A GROUNDBREAKING WAY TO TELL PEOPLE YOU'VE ONLY SEEN THE
FIRST THIRD OF "JURASSIC PARK."
THE PREHISTORIC PLANS ARE BEING HATCHED BY ELON MUSK'S BUSINESS
PARTNER AND GUY WHO MOVED IN NEXT DOOR RIGHT BEFORE YOUR CAT
DISAPPEARED, MAX HODAK.
THIS WEEKEND, HODAK TWEETED, "WE COULD PROBABLY BUILD
'JURASSIC PARK' IF WE WANTED TO.
WOULDN'T BE GENETICALLY AUTHENTIC DINOSAURS, BUT-- SHRUG
EMOJI."
WAY TO CASUALLY TOSS OFF THAT YOUR DINOSAURS WOULD BE
GENETICALLY SUSPECT WITH THE OLD...
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIS TWEETS AFTER THE PARK IS OPEN.
"PARK TEMPORARILY CLOSED.
TYRANNOSAURUS JUST ATE A FOURTH GRADE FIELD TRIP-- DANCING
LADY, DANCING LADY."
OH, AND IN CASE YOU'RE WONDERING WHAT HODAK DOES WHEN HE'S NOT
MUSING ON CREATING A NIGHTMARE FUTURE OF ROGUE HYPERPREDATORS,
HE'S THE PRESIDENT OF NEURALINK, THAT COMPANY YOU MAY HAVE HEARD
OF THAT WANTS TO "IMPLANT A COMPUTER CHIP INTO THE HUMAN
BRAIN VIA A ROBOT SURGEON TO WIRELESSLY CONNECT THE BRAIN TO
THE DIGITAL WORLD."
HEY, TECHNO-BUCKO, IF YOU WANT TO SURGICALLY IMPLANT A CHIP IN
MY BRAIN TO JACK ME INTO THE MATRIX, NO SIDE HUSTLES!
FOCUS, BUDDY!
ALSO, YOU DON'T NEED ROBOT NEUROSURGEONS.
JUST HAVE SOME HOT PERSON WHO WON A REALITY COMPETITION DO IT.
LET'S MAKE BRAIN MODIFICATION SEXY!
STICK AROUND.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH LESLIE ODOM JR.
♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪