so as you can tell from the title of the video I have been a doula for 15 years yes in 2005
I decided to leave my career as a database programmer to become a doula and I've learned
a lot of lessons in those 15 years and I'd love to share some with you today in this video we haven't
met in real life my name is Alice Turner I'm a doula I'm a lot certified childbirth educator
and on my channel and I make videos about birth now before I made videos about birth I made a lot
of videos about doula work and two videos that I made work about the lessons that I learned in my
first 10 years of doula work I will add links down below to the first video I made about five lessons
learned in ten years of doula work and then I made five more lessons learned in ten years of do the
work and I realized it's been 5 more years and I met 15 years of doula work so I actually posted
in the community if you are a subscriber to the channel you'll have access to the community and
I did a poll asking if you wanted to hear a video about my lessons learned in 15 years and it was
an overwhelming yes so here we are let's get into it lesson number one become a childbirth educator
also so if you are a doula and you haven't gone for any certification in childbirth education I
highly recommend you do this so having these two certifications really work so nicely together
I was a doula for many years before I decided to become a childbirth educator and once I got
that Lamaze certification I was able to add another service to my offering so I was able
to add choppers education courses I started doing private childbirth classes and really felt like I
could offer my clients a much broader service than just the doula service there's other benefits to
being a childbirth educator you stay up-to-date on research so usually childbirth educators are
keeping abreast of what is going on in research for childbirth and I think makes the doula role
very rich to have that skill as well so I really recommend that if you are a doula and you haven't
gotten certified as a childbirth educator as well to do that now I have heard of some doulas who go
ahead and teach childbirth class before they go through any kind of certification or childbirth
education training and this might work for some but I think that going through training
and certification is very valuable so that you are current on ways to teach and good strategies
for teaching and just how to like I said stay up-to-date so if you are a doula consider being a
childbirth educator and getting that certification at the same time because it really benefits
both you and your clients lesson number two was actually learned just in this last year and the
reason for this is I had a move in my life I had been working as a doula in Atlanta for 14 of my
15 years and spent the last year of my doula work working in Seattle so my lesson number two is that
the doula experience differs greatly from areas of the country I'm sure areas of the world it is not
the same for all doulas this is a tricky subject for me to handle so I have so many thoughts on
this but doulas are not given the same level of respect in all areas of the world and I saw this
firsthand in my 14 years of doula work in Atlanta I spent all 14 years building relationships
with care providers building relationships with hospitals with nursing staff with midwives with
doctors and it was a very high priority to me to work well with other providers and it worked I had
several Obie's several practices that I had good relationships with and would send me referrals
had me on lists but I will not underestimate the amount of work that this took and how many times
hundreds of times I would appear at a hospital and I still did not always have respectful interaction
with the care team I would say even in my last of my 14 years there before I left I worked with
several nurses and doctors who don't respect or value a dualist role and sometimes it was
often even hostile even though I came with a very collaborative respectful effort I'd never I didn't
always receive that in return I've talked to many doulas that work around the u.s. and Canada and I
know that this is a shared experience where we are often really working hard and harder than
ever to build relationships and prove our value to the birth team it wasn't until I attended a birth
in Seattle I saw such a different side so I've attended several births in Seattle at different
hospitals and each time I have been welcomed into the birth team and just shown so much respect and
it almost it did it made me cry my first time I actually drove home crying and I was crying
because just thinking about all the years that I worked to try to gain that respect and this was
just my first birth there I walked in I introduced myself I said I just moved from Atlanta this is
my first time at this hospital and the nurse just said welcome to me showed me where everything was
was asking my opinion the Midwife was treating us as a team and to get that kind of respect
instantly is just amazing and something that all of us deserve so my tears were also for all of us
that have to struggle that have to go through so much hard work to be accepted and have to continue
proving ourselves over and over again and it is that so my heart goes out to all of you if you
are a doula who doesn't have an easy time of the culture in the area that you practice like I have
experienced here in Seattle and I really owe a debt of gratitude to all of the duelists that came
before me in the city and all of the big players in the city as well like Penny simpkin that have
just worked in the city educating about the you know power of a doula and the value of a doula
so thank you see I'm gonna do Liz for paving the way and keep up the fight all the doulas in areas
of the world that still got to go out there and prove yourself so number two is it's not the same
everywhere number three is not quite as emotional the third lesson learned in 15 years of doula work
is that a prepared partner is so valuable to team and makes for so much better for everyone this
concept is something that I have been thinking about for years that dads and partners their
role is critical and sometimes goes under noticed or underutilized and really partners really just
need just a little bit of extra education and direction and they can just thrive and have a
positive birth experience as well and the reason at this lesson actually in this realization of the
value of a prepared partner is what led to my current path that I'm working on right now and
supporting her which is an online childbirth course specifically for partners and it is my
belief that partners play such a valuable role and can benefit with education that led me to creating
the supporting her program so more details if you want to find out about supporting her are
down below but it is a role that should not go unnoticed and I know doulas really on a hands-on
in the birth birth dualist can bring a partner in showdown what to do and really make them feel
included but it is great to provide education in advance so that they know what we will be
suggesting so that they have an idea of how things go and how they can best take care of themselves
because even though I as a doula will be checking on them making sure that they're drinking and
eating if they know in advance that they are going to need to do that it makes my suggestions at the
time a lot more effective so number three the value of a prepared partner is a lesson that I
learned in 15 years from doula work okay number four number four is going to show my age number
four is being a doula is harder as you get older yes that is number four that for me I have learned
that I don't bounce back from a birth as easily as I did 15 years ago and I like to think of myself
as a fairly healthy person I exercise regularly I drink my water I eat fairly well and so I take
care of myself and I'm a fairly good health knock on wood however those long overnights the extended
time without sleep really it's hard to recover from at my age so I find that this is something
that I didn't think about so much when I got into doula work I didn't necessarily think about how
challenges that I would face as I got older and I actually the only thing that was on my mind
at the time was that it will be easier because my children will be older so they will be at an
age that they can babysit each other they won't be breastfeeding anymore and you know they'll
be in school so I really visualized that my time at this age would be a lot easier however it is
harder and I would say if I miss a night's sleep with a birth I used to be able to recover within
a few days and now it's about a full week until I am feeling back to myself so it doesn't mean
that you cannot be a doula at a very wide range of Ages but my lesson learned is that I need to
plan this better and one of the ways that I have planned this is actually a lesson learned in my
10 years of doula work again I'll put the video link below and that is that doula partnerships are
amazing I have found that doula partnerships are the way that I can make this work for my own self
and for being able to recover that is a lesson learned so the fifth lesson learned it's kind of
a bummer but stay with me okay lesson learned is doula burnout is real and I've known this we hear
about it we talk about it probably if you went through a doula training your trainer might have
even mentioned it that doulas can burn out but now that I have been doing it for 15 years I have seen
so many great doulas stop or kans doula and there are many factors that go into doula burnout and it
really is a wide variety depending upon the person but some common things that I have seen have to do
with what I talked about in for just the physical intensity and requirements of being a doula are
high the life on call can be exhausting and can really take a toll on family relationships and
just general stress on doulas depending upon how you handle being on call and strategies that you
have in place so not managing that well and are not learning the best way to manage it can really
take a toll also the income challenges of being a doula not having a steady paycheck not having an
employer having to maybe run your own business have your own health care there are a lot of
challenges on the business side that if you are not a natural businessperson or have interest in
it it might just lead to burnout from not feeling like you have you can make the income that you
need for your family so there are several factors that go into it but burnout is real and back to
number two where I said the experiences differ from area to area of where you're practicing and
you do look that is constantly having to prove their worth prove their worth and prove their
value can really be exhausting and can lead to burnout so knowing this if you are a newer doula
be super aware of how it's going how are you structuring your business how are you setting
your prices taking your clients working with backups doing partnerships think about where
you will be in 15 years and what strategies you can do to sustain it if this is a career that you
love I love it I want to keep going as long as I can it will look different I take a lot less
clients than I did five years ago ten years ago and even 15 years ago but I still love it and
I still have the joy working with families and helping in this important role that I feel like
I'm called to do so I want to hear from you what are your thoughts on these lessons do you have
lessons you would like to share with someone else who is watching this video if you do I would love
for you to enter them in those comments below that would help me and I would love to read
them as well so if you found this video helpful please hit the like button if you want to share
it with your doula colleagues our doula friends hit the share button and I will be back next time
with another video about birth thanks so much for joining me today guys really appreciate it