it starts with a little flea that jumps upon a rat it bites the rat and gives it
germs and for the rat that's that then lovely it looks for somewhere else to find its food
it hops on you and me and starts to suck our blood
first you feel a little poorly and then you start to swell then you start to spit some
blood and then you really smell then you know it's time to ring your funeral bell
along comes mr dead and swishes you to hell gone there's lots of cures to help you
if you have the cash kill the village cats and dogs and burn them all to ash sit down
in a sewer so the smell dries plague away place chicken bottoms on your spots then you'll be okay
first
little children even more than mums or dads i prie said it's because the wicked kids have acted bad
half the people on the earth are simply blown away so for mr dead these will be really busy days
i could just squeeze out a poo
i could make a frozen chisholm and dig my way to france it's a true story
it's frozen fighter let it go
i've been trapped for several hours underneath
all this snow and maybe it's the frost by talking and the lack of air to say goodbye
can i say something crazy will you marry me
can i say something even crazier you were talking to a poo frozen frankenstein
in britain's georgian times there were so many crimes no time to hang each crook guilty
of a felony cause there's no room to jail yeah they send you to australia to live in our
newfangled people colony i think that sounds like heaven in 1787. it wasn't that kind of once in her
lifetime
he needed food and shelter but everything
failed trees too strong for valley stagnant water smelling
a real step back in time in new south wales soil to puff a body huts washed up by flooding houses
situation tricky tricky tricky then
clears just one catch you gotta pay your own way back
no wages meant no money no choice but what's funny many state became farmers and made us
original arrivals proved hardy survivors sydney turned into a place you'd choose to go
think that they'd be fairer to convicts who were sent there no way they felt prisons even more
what i remote was one of the jails where every escape attempt fails
was one man who nearly got through billy hunt dressed as a kangaroo
holiday paradise
i'm not a famous surgeon and i earn my daily bread by studying cadavers which are bodies not
long dead one day two suave young gentlemen appeared within my view i'm mr berg i'm mr hare
how do you do these gents explained that their acquaintance had just passed away it
seemed the body'd only been a goner for a day excuse the curious offer said here or was it
back but would you care to slice this up to see how corpses work well it's
always a lava getting hold of a cadaver so i said yes i'll have her oh it's me
this body taught me much about what makes a person poorly why some men live to 99
and some die prematurely how these parts function perfectly while others won't repair
how everything is interlinked what's that doing there
until one day there was nothing left and all my work was spent then burke and i turned up again my
how convenient another slab of fresh human organ bones and flesh another gory sesh excellent views
as time went on these kind men brought me several guys and girls my lab was chock-a-block with all
their freshly passed on pals i paid them lots of money bodies came from everywhere you really are
a busy mr burke and mr hare they seem such culture gentlemen i never did suspect that burke and hair
were not so nice i really should have checked then one day a policeman came asked if i'd seen a chap
i hadn't but days later his cops turned up in my lap it seemed that these acquaintances of
birkenhead actually were not their friends and many did not always die naturally mark
and herod murdered them it was plain to see then brought the corpses to my lab and pocketed the fee
the two men were arrested but one of them set free
poor burke was hanged but happily his corpse was sent to me
bit whiffy still much to learn
the famous roman empire was the biggest meanest neighborhood
we fall with the baddest emperors and by bad we don't mean good
my name is
one time i killed a priest who'd come to sacrifice a beast you think it's sad that he's deceased we
all laugh like chumps i'm very hairy but take note if you so much as whisper goat with an iron wood
you will be smoked in a good boot today so i won't slit your throat i'm bad a shameless rotten cat
do you still have limbs since meeting me then i guess you should be glad
your nastiness was fabulous but my name's larka barnes and i was far far worse just listen to
my verse i was quite notorious for catapulting venomous snakes at rome's enormous crowds of how
they fled if you won a lottery prize i'd give you beast dead dogs and flies my house gets got a nice
surprise a lion in their bed you think to children i'd be cute to know i was their biggest executor
use their guts to read the future says here i should get a job as a school tutor
i'm bad he's bad could argue i was sad heated through our empire from great britain to baghdad
afraid your claim is bogus because my name is commodus
and no one else could be a worse emperor than me
there never was a greater pretend gladiator if the booing got too loud may the lions fight the crowd
just one man was grander julius alexander so i killed him seekers on the emperor me
my action's truly red you only got the emperor job because you were chosen by your dad
to me you all score zero my name is emperor nero evil men you're not i'm the worstest
awful lot my rule was full of fear oh yes men from far and near all called me a fighting hero
or i would have them slayed change the olympic season so the medals went to me
son burn christians for no reason just a fun game i played you know poison my stepbrother
ordered men to kill my mother tried to drown her but she fled so i had her instead wait
there's more with my first wife dear octavia i showed truly bad behavior chopped her head
off gave it to my girlfriend who i then killed two i'm bad so bunny of badness i'm the daddy
come on i wanna see a more evil bloke than me oh bad real bad nothing more to add
i'm the baddest emperor the romans ever
had beheaded and died divorced beheaded survive i'm henry viii i had six sorry wives some might
say i ruined their lives catherine of aragon was one she failed to give me a son i had to ask her
for a divorce that broke up her heart of course young and berlin she was two had a daughter the
best she could do i said she flirted with some other man and offered the chop went dear anne
lovely jane seymour was three the love of a lifetime for me she gave me a son little prince
ed then for all jane went and dropped dead divorced beheaded and died divorced beheaded
survived i'm henry viii i had six sorry wives some might say i ruined their lives
and of cleaves came at four i fell for the portrait i saw then laid eyes on her face
and cried she's a horse i must have another divorce catherine howard was five a child of
nineteen so alive she flirted with others no way to behave the axe sent young cath to her grave
catherine parshi was lost by then all my best days were past
i lay on my deathbed age just 55. lucky catherine the last stayed alive i mean how unfair
divorce beheaded and died divorced beheaded survived
i'm henry viii i had six sorry wives you could say i ruined their lives
if your body
denying and i guess not washing does increase your danger of dying they've
got saunas and steam rooms they're healthy and strong but we've got something better
you