Now, granted
in most scenarios,
it's a man initiating the date
and because of that,
I do think it's going to likely to fall
on the man to pay for that first date.
But again,
I don’t think it would be fair for a woman
to initiate the date
but then expect the man to pay.
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So, let's get right to it.
Here is a popular question
I get asked all the time, all right.
And it’s the simple question of
who should pay on the first date?
Now, as always
before I give you my answer,
subscribe to the video,
like the video... Well, subscribe to my channel,
like the video,
and I want you to leave your comment below
and vote,
should men pay?
Should women pay?
And then yeah, you know what,
just pick out of those two.
Should men or women pay
and if you have a third option throw it in there.
I’m going to tell you what I think.
Now, before I explain to you
who I think should pay on the first date,
let me give you my
perspective personally.
Now, I want to make something very clear,
the way that I handle things doesn't mean
this is the way that you have
to handle things, all right.
This is my personal position,
this is how I'm wired,
I feel the need to share it with you,
but I’m going to explain how I think
you and everyone else should approach this topic.
So, for me,
I'm always paying for the first date.
I'm always probably paying
for every damn date to be honest with you
because that’s just how
I'm wired, you know what I'm saying?
I was raised in a way that
I'm all about men being providers and protectors.
I really believe in that,
I strongly stand behind that
I truly feel like,
if we had more dynamic in place,
this world will be a much better place to live.
Relationships would be healthier,
stronger, and happier.
So, for me,
I'm not really comfortable
with allowing the woman
to pay for the date.
And to be honest with you, I'm the type of person
if I go out with my homeboys,
I'm even likely to pay sometimes
or maybe not as staunch about it
with my homeboys than I would be with a woman.
But still,
you know that’s just my nature, all right.
And I've even had situations
where women attempted to pay
and I was like no, I'll handle that.
However,
even though I'm a strong believer in paying,
There’s always something
I look for from her end
in those scenarios.
And it's not a make or break situation,
but it can give her some points.
And I do think it’s something that
women should consider.
I'm going to tell you
at the end what that is.
So, now, let's jump to what I think
how you should handle
who should pay on a date.
And to be very plain and simple,
it's whoever initiated the date.
Now, granted
in most scenarios it’s a man
initiating the date and because of that,
I do think it's going to likely fall
on the man to pay for that first date.
But again,
I don’t think it would be fair,
for a woman to initiate the date but then
expect the man to pay, all right.
Again, some men if they are like me,
they're going to pay probably anyway.
They're not going to let you pay,
but to expect that,
to have that expectation
and to hold it against him if he
is looking for you to pay when you initiate it,
I don’t think that's fair and reasonable.
So, whoever initiates the date
should be the one willing to pay for the date.
Now let me say this,
I feel like in today’s world,
we've gotten too caught up in
how much we're even spending on the first date
and the reason why we're even having a conflict
at times about who should pay
is because granted, everybody doesn’t have the budget
to handle going on a date right now.
And some people would argue, well, if you ain’t got the budget
stay behind home you shouldn’t be dating.
But that's a whole different video,
whole another topic.
The point that I want to make here is that,
I think we also need to be more creative
with our first dates.
It does not need to be about spending money.
Listen, dating is about
getting to know someone,
seeing if we're on the same page,
do we want the same things, are we
moving in the same direction?
So, with that in mind,
the price of the date
is not really important
or it should not be important.
And I think for men, be more creative,
going to a coffee shop,
walk in the parks, different things, going to a museum.
Now granted,
there are going to be some women
who still take issue with that.
I would argue that if she takes issue with it,
chances are,
she wasn’t that into you to begin with, all right.
She was looking for more out of it because
she's not really drawn to you
as a man, as an individual.
So, she wants the superficial things to satisfy her
because when a woman really, really likes a guy,
she's not taking issue with the creative date,
with the walks in the park, with the ice-cream date,
and simple things like that,
that are not expensive,
but still allows you both
to get know each other
and spend quality time together.
So, if you have an issue
with how much is being spent
or the cost of dates,
get more creative with them.
There are so many options to look into,
so many things to explore.
Back to
what I was saying in the very beginning of
what I look for
even when I pay for a date
and I think men should be mindful of
and I think women should be mindful of.
I’m going to pay,
I’m going to always pay,
but I love to see
when the woman offers to pay for the tip.
Now again,
is it mandatory? No.
If she doesn't offer do I say
oh my Gosh, we can't go any further, no.
But does it place a great light on her
when she's showing
a willingness to contribute?
That's it
and you know what, there’s a chance that
I still won't let her pay for the tip
because that’s just how I’m,
but some men, they will let you.
And let's say I do let you,
regardless, it's the fact
that you offer. It's your willingness to do that,
it's your willingness to say,
I'm not just here
to take advantage of you.
I'm not just here to have you take care of everything.
I want to show you investment in this as well.
I think that's a beautiful gesture.
Again, if a woman doesn't do it,
I don’t think that mean she's some horrible person
or you shouldn’t have a second date.
But if you're a woman listening to this, consider that.
Consider that if he's going to actually
take care of the whole time for you.
So, this is just simple, whoever initiates the date
pays for the date.
But I do think women consider paying for the tip.
And if it was flipped,
where the woman is paying for the actual date
then as a man, offer to take care of the tip.
I just think that when you have a scenario where
both parties are showing mutual effort,
both parties are willing to invest,
willing to contribute, that’s a beautiful thing.
So, again, let me know below
what do you think,
men should pay, women should pay,
or do you like my answer,
whoever initiates the date?
Like the video, subscribe to my channel,
and I look forward to seeing you in the next video.
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