hey everyone and welcome to top think today we're going to learn about 10 things you should never
say to a girl now let's begin number one you should smile more have you ever told a woman
to smile more you may mean well you may be trying to give her a compliment but this
phrase is a recipe for disaster you may think you're being smooth and confident but you're not
if you tell her to smile more she won't feel like smiling she'll feel like biting her head off girls
don't want notes on their facial expressions they don't care whether you want him to smile more
if you tell him to smile more it's only going to make her angrier so why is that because she's not
there to attract or entertain you you may want her to smile but what if she doesn't feel like smiling
you have no idea how she's feeling or what she's thinking about so telling her to smile is
always the wrong answer nine times out of ten you should just keep your recommendations to yourself
number two don't take this the wrong way this simple preface turns any comment into
a surefire catastrophe when you use this phrase what's the one thing she's guaranteed to think
if you tell her not to take it the wrong way she'll think how could i take it the wrong way
as soon as that thought crosses her mind buddy you're in the red so what should you do instead
just take a moment to think about what you're going to say is it something she needs to hear
is it something she'd like to hear most of the time we use this preface to soften a blow to
cushion an insult or criticism so if it wasn't negative you wouldn't need this backwards phrase
would you you would never say hey don't take this the wrong way but you have a beautiful smile
or don't take this the wrong way but you've got a great sense of humor yeah that wouldn't make
any sense would it we use this phrase when we're tiptoeing the line between positive and negative
between complementary and critical so if you're ever in doubt think about this how would the same
comment make you feel would your feelings get hurt if the answer's yes then it's better left unsaid
number three don't be so sensitive sometimes guys have trouble understanding girls perspectives
when a misunderstanding happens many guys develop a bad habit
instead of sympathizing with her they say you're being too sensitive or you're being
too emotional they say she's overreacting but is she overreacting is she really being too sensitive
when you tell a girl that she's too sensitive or emotional you're invalidating her feelings you're
implying that she lacks emotional control so her feelings are not real important or reasonable
phrases like you're too sensitive make women feel ignored and invalidated just imagine this
situation you're feeling angry about something that happened at work you tell your girlfriend
about your terrible day and she says oh you're being too sensitive wouldn't that make you angry
you feel frustrated because she's throwing your feelings out the window
she's talking down to you as though your emotions don't matter so even if you don't understand
a girl's perspective don't ignore her emotions don't tell her she's too sensitive or overreacting
try to understand where she's coming from because her emotions are just as valid as yours
number four can i have your number guys want to be confident around girls they like you want to
seem masculine and decisive courageous and daring so you make a bold move and out of nowhere you
walk up grab her attention and ask her on a date are you showing courage and confidence or are
you crossing boundaries that you really shouldn't cross let's say you see a pretty girl at a coffee
shop you think she's attractive so you want to get to know her but you're worried about looking
like a nice guy so what do you do you dive in head first and without even introducing yourself
you ask her hey can i have your number immediately the interaction goes south she turns you down and
she tells you to leave her alone but what went wrong to this girl you're a complete stranger
she doesn't feel comfortable or safe around you she doesn't know you or care about you
and by suddenly asking for her number you don't seem confident and courageous you seem creepy so
if you want to get closer to a girl you need to take your time get comfortable around each other
get to know each other that's how you develop a stable trusting connection with a girl you like
you lay a strong foundation you show her what kind of person you are if you really are confident and
courageous you don't need some big romantic gesture she'll see how confident you are just
by talking to you if she likes what she sees the two of you may connect on a personal level
and once that happens you can take the relationship to the next level
number five what's wrong on its own asking what's wrong is a good thing guys should take an interest
in how girls are feeling if she seems upset ask her what's wrong give her a chance to blow off
steam or talk through her feelings but you can only ask what's wrong so many times if you ask
her too often you'll start creating more problems than you're solving many guys get worried each
time they see a strange look on her face or a change in the tone of her voice so they pester
girls with questions convinced that something must be wrong she may say that she's fine but
you don't believe her so you ask what's wrong again and again and again until suddenly she's
not fine anymore she's frustrated with you because you keep insisting that something is wrong so if
she says she's okay it's all right to be a little skeptical not everyone says what they mean but
it's also important to trust her and believe her don't be negligent to her feelings but don't pry
every two seconds either let her know that you're there if she needs you and then leave it alone
number six you look tired have you ever casually said to a girl you look tired in your mind it's
a simple observation but in the wrong context an observation can be devastating she might be tired
she might not have slept well last night but that doesn't mean you want to point it out chances are
she made an effort to hide her fatigue maybe she put on makeup or invested time into her appearance
she wanted to look her best but all you seem to notice is how tired she looks this observation
may seem harmless to you but think about what you're saying and what you're not saying
when you tell a girl she looks tired you're making her feel worse about herself you're
disregarding the time and energy she put into her appearance so if you want to make an observation
tell her how great she looks there's never a good reason to tear someone down but there's
always a good reason to build them back up so acknowledge the good things about her not the bad
number seven you're acting crazy what's the one word that aggravates the entire
female population the word crazy if your girlfriend gets mad at you you call her crazy
if your mother makes a fuss about a holiday you forgot you call her crazy guys dismiss so many
women is crazy but the truth is they're not crazy at all guys use this word to ignore a woman's
point of view they can't see the world from their perspective so they don't even try instead they
dismiss everything they do is crazy girls aren't crazy just like they're not too sensitive or too
emotional everyone experiences things differently everyone reacts to problems differently the
sooner you stop dismissing her perspective the more of her perspective that you'll understand
number eight it's just guy stuff our society is filled with gender-specific subjects jobs games
and media we pretend like these stereotypes and boundaries divide us into separate categories
but those categories don't exist don't reinforce those categories by blocking or gatekeeping the
women in your life for example let's say you and your friends love to talk about basketball
if a woman takes an interest don't block her out don't tell her it's just guy stuff in the same
way don't roll your eyes at subjects you think are girly or feminine avoid phrases like i don't want
to hear about girl stuff or that's too girly for me these comments are frustrating and isolating
they reinforce long-standing divisions between men and women divisions that don't need to exist
so take an interest in her passions and include her in yours mutual sharing is the
best way to get to know someone no matter what gender stereotypes you have in mind
number nine i liked it better have you ever told a girl i liked it better when your hair
was longer or i like it more when you wear dresses comments like these are unwelcome and to be frank
manipulative the way she dresses is not your responsibility she doesn't care what you think
or prefer she wants you to appreciate the way she looks and dresses right now that's
all there is to it so stop weighing in on her physical appearance she's not changing
her style for you she's doing it for herself so your preferences are the last thing on her mind
number 10 i don't care do the women in your life make all your decisions for you
many men take a back seat in their relationships they give women complete control of the reigns
because guys think girls want to run the show on their own but that's not true if it were she
wouldn't be in a relationship she'd operate all on her own girls are not looking for mindless puppies
to follow him around she wants to share opinions with you and make decisions together she wants to
operate as a pair so if a girl asks you what you want to do don't say we can do whatever you want
if she wants to hear your opinion then don't say i don't care you're in this relationship together
both of you should contribute to every decision big and small hey thank you
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