i've been told that i'm too much by
strangers oh my god i freaking love
chella except for the fact that they
donate to anti-lgbtq and also pro-gun
organizations
me too it's like if urban outfitters
were a musical especially because urban
and anthropology and free people are
owned by republican conservatives who
profit off of female democrats and
donate their money to similarly hateful
groups
oh here comes queen oh wow you really
went all
out with your flower crown yeah don't
you think it's a bit much
actually my flower crown is historically
accurate
what are you talking about here let's
jump to the 1600s in colonial spain
mexico and other spanish colonies
where they had the most remarkable
funerary portraits of deceased
nuns you have to jump
jump now this is where flower crowns
came from
though it may seem creepy these
portraits played an important role in
remembering these nuns who
in a society where most political and
social power was controlled by men
exerted a good deal of influence and
authority as leaders of their convent
communities
ew they're like dead oh my god mitch get
away from the dead lady
baby's drunk mommy really i've time
traveled for you guys and that's this is
what you do
oh my god you're hopelessly basic okay
let's just jump back
wait hello my colleagues
acting is reacting to
things that are happening
in the moment you may say something
or not but ultimately it's about
pretending so for our first exercise
i'd like everyone to tell me about a
childhood game they played
well when we were kids we used to
pretend we were orphans my god i had a
character
who was a princess that needed to be
evacuated from a castle
sort of like anastasia oh my god i used
to do that too
i'd sit outside in the rain pretend i
was scrounging for food
i bet orphans don't play that game
i think orphans play the game where they
pretend they have two loving parents
that they're growing up in a financially
stable emotionally regulated middle
class nuclear family
well i guess i'll just shut the hell up
now even by my cats
wow okay but my point is that hearing
i'm too much
is a trigger for me and very often i
take it personally and become
hysterical
so think of a time when someone did or
said something and you just
exploded you were like out of control
and then in a few hours you calmed down
and you kind of realized your reaction
was intense and you apologized to those
you took it out on
sound familiar my therapist says that
when it's hysterical it's historical
this is a fun phrase to explain amygdala
hijacking which is a personal
emotional response that is immediate
overwhelming and very often an
overreaction to what's actually
happening because it's triggered a much
more significant
emotional threat so being rational when
your amygdala has been hijacked is
impossible because you're in
fight-or-flight mode we're unable to act
rationally again until our amygdala
calms down
and no longer perceives a threat being
present however
there is a way to deal with this make a
list identifying your biggest
triggers becoming familiar with them
will immediately depersonalize the
triggering situations that you're in
so on my list i have uh when my when i
feel like my character is being attacked
uh when i feel like i'm not being heard
or my opinion is being dismissed
and when i'm told that i'm too sensitive
or too much
awareness alone will not prevent
hijacking but it can help you realize
that it's happening and then you can
withdraw yourself from the situation
so you don't say things or break things
or be mean or however you manifest
emotional distress
i know when i'm in the middle of a
hijack i absolutely should not send text
messages
so i put my phone on airplane mode or
throw it away i mean like far like not
in the trash just like you know throw it
into the air
and this is a good decision cut out
smart the amygdala
i'm anna akana and thank you to
squarespace for sponsoring today's
whatever this was
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