- If I hadn't learned how to overcome this,
there's no way I would be doing what I'm doing today.
And I don't want you missing out on God's best for your life
because you shied away from new opportunities.
(bright pop music)
Hey, I'm Terri Savelle Foy, your cheerleader of dreams.
Thanks for joining me today.
We're gonna talk about 3 powerful ways to stop being so shy.
And I speak straight from experience.
But hey, real quick, if you've never subscribed
to this channel, would you just push the arrow below
so I know that these messages are helping you.
It just lets me know you want more faith-building motivation
to help you live your dreams.
So let's talk about the topic of shyness.
We know the obvious negative consequences of being shy,
like loneliness, insecurity, rejecting opportunities,
missin' out on exciting things.
In fact, if I hadn't learned how to overcome this,
there's no way I would be doing what I'm doing today.
And I don't want you missin' out on God's best for your life
because you shied away from new opportunities.
Now, I've shared before the other aspects
of overcoming shyness and insecurity.
In fact, I'm gonna put a link to a video
called "The #1 Way I Built My Confidence."
But today, I want to share with you three powerful ways
from my own life experience
that you can stop shyness and insecurity
and be seen as a person with confidence.
And it may not be what you think.
Are you ready?
Number one is lead yourself.
Lead yourself.
You know, I heard a story years ago
about John Maxwell teachin' at a seminar
where he did a Q & A at the end.
A kid with an MBA stood up,
he's just admiring everything about John.
And he said, "I love your leadership principles."
He said, "I keep thinking, man,
"I wish I had somebody to lead.
"I wish I had a team to lead, or a company, or department."
He said, "Where should I start?"
John Maxwell said, "Good question.
"Start with you."
He said, "If you wouldn't follow yourself,
"why should anyone else follow you?"
In other words, start developing the qualities in you
that you admire in other people.
So a good exercise is to imagine a teenager saying,
"I wanna learn to be successful.
"Can I just shadow you for the next five days
"and watch your habits?"
What would they see?
What would they observe about your daily life,
your routine, your rituals, your habits
that would motivate them to wanna be like you?
You've probably heard the stories of me after college,
how I was so undisciplined, livin' paycheck to paycheck.
Never listened to things
like this kinda podcast for personal growth.
I just listened to the radio,
and I would just jam out on the way to work.
I was extremely insecure, shy, felt insignificant,
didn't feel like I really had much to offer.
I would shy away from being around influential people
because of how I felt about myself.
Well, now it makes sense to me
why in 2002 when I was falling apart,
I didn't have any vision for my life,
but I heard this in prayer.
"Don't be average and your life won't be average."
That applies to everything.
Don't be average, and your career won't be average.
Don't be average, and your finances won't be average.
Your relationships won't be average.
See, your life will only grow to the extent that you grow.
Your confidence will only grow
to the extent that you grow.
And I just made a decision to start developing
success habits in my life every single day for 21 days.
In fact, at the end, I'm gonna give you
a seven-point checklist this week,
if you'll click the link in the description.
And it explains the daily habits
I started in 2002 and haven't stopped.
Here's the thing.
When you start practicing these success habits, trust me,
when you build a reputation with yourself
that you keep your word, your confidence will soar.
Now stay till the end and I gonna share with you
the checklist to get you started.
So number two is encourage yourself.
Be your own cheerleader.
See, you will behave on the outside
the way you talk to yourself on the inside.
Interview any successful person
and they'll tell you how important
positive self-talk is to your confidence.
See, you must believe that you can succeed.
Bible says David encouraged himself in the Lord.
Well, the most successful people in the world practice this.
Olympians, CEOs, celebrities,
Jim Carey, Tim Tebow, Suze Orman, Will Smith, you name it.
They realize, maybe they don't know
it comes from the Bible, maybe they do.
But death and life are in the power of the tongue.
So you may feel like you're not as good
as other people, but don't speak it.
You know, it may look like it's gonna take years
to achieve your dreams, but don't speak it.
It may appear that nothing is workin' in your favor,
but don't speak it.
So if you wanna know where your life is headed,
listen to the words that are comin' outta your mouth.
You know, we get accustomed to saying negative things
like, "I'm just shy.
"I never get any good breaks.
"Nobody really notices me.
"I could never make that much money.
"I'd never get that kinda job."
Here's my point.
Stop all those "I could never" statements
from comin' outta your mouth.
You are limiting yourself by your vocabulary.
So I want you to see your words are keeping you
locked into the very circumstances that you want out of.
You've heard of the Miranda Rights.
"Anything you say can and will be held against you."
It's true!
So you've gotta give yourself a pep talk.
Not accidentally, intentionally.
Now when I began to realize this
I had to number one, stop staying negative things.
Number two, start saying positive things.
And you know what?
My life began to move in the direction of my words.
First I started with a list of declarations
to speak over myself.
And when I started doing this,
it was the exact opposite of what I was experiencing.
I would say things like, "I'm confident.
"I'm courageous.
"I'm qualified by God.
"My gift is makin' room for me
"and bringin' me before great people."
Then I would add this.
"I'm confident to speak in front of live audiences.
"I'm confident to speak on television.
"I'm confident to speak
"at the largest conferences in the nation."
Now the most I'd ever spoken to was 325 people.
But you know what?
There came a day where it went to 3,000 people.
Then it went to 13,000 people.
And today, I'm speakin' at some
of the largest conferences in the world.
What am I saying?
If you'll change what you're saying,
you'll change what you're seeing.
And hey, if this video's helping you today,
would you push the Like button real quick
or leave a comment letting me know that you enjoy this.
So my other point, number three, is focus yourself.
Now, lemme explain.
I want you to get laser-focused.
Have you ever heard that phrase?
"It's better to be world class at a few things
"than mediocre at most things."
See, if you wanna build your confidence,
become the best in your field.
Become an expert in what you're passionate about.
If it's baking cookies, become the best.
If it's selling houses, immerse yourself in wisdom
to become the best realtor.
If it's healthcare or a fitness trainer,
go above and beyond to be known
for being the best at what you do.
See, being known for something means
you're not just a jack-of-all-trades, you're a specialist.
And as a specialist, you receive respect
because you're perceived as the expert.
Lemme ask you this.
If somebody had to think of something
that reminded them of you, what would it be?
Like, when people hear your name, what do they think of?
What do they associate you with?
I want you to become so focused
that you distinguish yourself.
You know, Myles Munroe said,
"Carve out a niche for yourself that they can't ignore you."
You know, when James Cameron was asked
how he managed to produce the two highest-grossing movies
of all time, "Titanic" and "Avatar," you know what he said?
"Focus."
He said, "You've gotta be laser-focused like a laser,
"super focused, to get anything worthwhile done."
He said, "When I did 'Avatar,'
"I was super focused for four years."
Well, Tom Monagham, founder
of Domino's Pizza, (doorbell chimes)
he was asked the secret of his success.
You know what he said?
"A fanatical focus on doing one thing very well."
Same with Bill Gates of Microsoft.
(Microsoft theme chimes)
He said, "If you wanna be a great software company,
"you have to be only a software company."
See, when you dabble in so many things,
you become okay at many things but not great at one thing.
So confident, successful people,
they're not great at everything.
They're great at one thing.
James 4 says, "A double-minded man
"is unstable in all his ways."
How many of his ways?
All of them.
Now, I'm tellin' you from experience,
when you immerse yourself in a certain field or topic,
your confidence will go to new heights
and shyness will be a thing of the past.
Does this make sense?
Well, I hope you're getting this 'cause I'm tellin' ya,
I wanna help you even more
by giving you my seven-point checklist
to help you distinguish yourself for success.
Now this is something I taught at a success conference
where people paid $400 each to attend.
And I wanna give you my personal notes from this message,
and you just go down the checklist as a guideline
to go from wishing things would change
in your life to living your dreams.
So all you have to do is click the link in the description
to get your free seven-point checklist.
And be sure to follow me on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter,
so I can cheer you on to live your dreams.
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Click below to subscribe to my channel.
Or you can click one of the two videos
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Thanks for watchin', I'm cheering you on.
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