- In this video, I will share with you
five reasons why he is not pursuing you.
(gentle music)
Hello, my name is Greta Bereisaite,
I'm leading end relationship coach for women,
for the awesome high valuable women secrets,
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And just before I will share with you
those five reasons why, if a guy you're dating
or you're seeing or talking to online,
or maybe are even married to is not pursuing you,
don't forget to take my free self-awareness test
to find a out are you a woman of high value or low value,
which I will drop down in the video description box below.
And if you like my merch, chase goals and not the drama,
as always, you can get it in my YouTube store.
So, why is he not pursuing you the reason number one.
And let's start with the most obvious one,
he is not that interested.
It could just be not enough of attraction from his side
or perhaps it could be not enough of bonding.
If he, for example, even approached you
and dropped you that hello message,
or you are so beautiful or gorgeous
or whatever, whatever, whatever,
but he's not following up,
it is because he is not interested enough.
It's very easy to ghost people on online dating
because once somebody says just something off
or once somebody doesn't reply on time to the message,
people just tend to unmatch and just ghost you.
And the reasons being are usually because
on big dating sites,
you assume that there is so much fish in the sea.
And if we just ghost someone,
there is still thousands of people waiting for us.
The online dating nowadays is compared to let's say,
when you go to this very, very big candy shop,
and you see so many candies that you like,
you don't know which ones to choose.
And there are some that you never even tried before.
So, you're like, maybe I should try these.
Maybe these are better than my favorite ones.
And you are just completely confused,
you're too overwhelmed with so much choice.
So, with online dating, if you have pretty pictures
and he send you something sweet,
but when he's not following up,
it's just because there is not enough of interest.
And perhaps, you said something off therefore,
he just ghosted (finger snaps) you like that
'cause he thinks there is potentially
so much more candy in the shop.
The reality is that through our entire lifetime,
we usually come across three to maximum five people
that we meet and truly bond.
So, even if it's thousands
and thousands of candy in the shop, we don't live forever.
We don't bond with everybody
and years do go by just like (finger snaps) that.
Number two reason why he doesn't pursue,
it's a new thing nowadays.
Well, it's not that new anymore.
It's been going on now maybe
for the last three years heavily,
before that it was still not many guys would do it,
but it's really heavy now for the last few years.
And I think, it's only because there are so many
dating coaches online, on YouTube,
on internet, et cetera, for men and women.
And what guys tend to believe
that a woman will like you if you will not pursue her.
So, some guys purposely don't pursue beautiful women
or the girls that they do like,
because they think
if you're gonna be the once ignoring that girl,
that girl will get intrigued.
How come he ignores me?
Everybody likes me and she will start to pursue him.
So, a lot of men take this type of approaches,
a complete BS approach,
and any mature woman will agree with me.
Whatever does work on girls that are a bit insecure,
they need self esteem boost, that need a lot of attention.
Something from the age of 13 to 20,
this type of stuff can apply.
However, majority of women grow up and mature
and these type of things don't work anymore.
Or we are then drawn to men
that provide safety and security,
behave like proper men and pursue women properly,
which is a very masculine thing to do.
Number three reason why he is not pursuing you
is could be because you are the one pursuing him.
You are the one in giving, you are the one texting,
calling, writing him long essays, overexplaining yourself.
A lot of ladies that are quite insecure,
they try to
overexplain
or overshare
or overcontrol
a guy that we are dating
because we desperately need that safety and security
that a guy should be giving anyway.
Ever, when you are approaching a guy from your insecurities
and vulnerabilities by overexplaining yourself
or by trying to control the situation,
any guy will either run
or he will fall into this feminine energy
and will behave as a receiver.
In that case, you will find your text messages
going something like this.
You text the guy first. You ask him how he is.
You share everything about yourself.
You tell a guy what you want,
what to do, et cetera, et cetera.
And he just replies to you, no worries,
thumbs up, no problem, I'll speak to you later.
I'm busy and just basically drops you tiny messages.
Then, you are left wondering and confused,
why is he not pursuing you?
He's not pursuing you cause you are the one showing him
that you're happy to do all the work,
are overwhelming him by your oversharing,
neediness, and controlling behavior.
I have a really good texting video for sale
for ladies that find themselves doing such a thing.
And you can find that video on my website.
I will put a link on where to get it
in my video description box below.
Number four reason why he is not pursuing you
is because he is in his pull away.
The guy just needs a bit of space from you.
A lot of people think that
when somebody says I need me time,
it means that I just need to be by myself.
A lot of guys will say, I need me time,
but what he's gonna mean by a me time,
he just needs a break from you.
A me time can be just me
hanging out with our friends,
other people and not a guy I'm with,
or for a guy, not the girl he's with.
He just needs a break from you.
And it is important to give a guy this type of break
because by having this type of break, he gets to miss you.
He gets to realize his feelings for you.
When he gets his space, he comes to you back and fresh,
trying to impress you and pursue you again.
The problem is with girls who don't let the guy pull away,
who don't let him have his space,
who don't give him his me time
because we feel too insecure, we don't trust him,
we panic, chase, be victimized themselves.
We blame the guy for needing space from you.
And when you don't let a guy pull away from you,
when we desperately want that space for them,
what happens is we cannot be happy, but you.
In return, he's not gonna be nice to you.
He's gonna feel irritated.
And eventually, will start to lose attraction for you.
Number five why men don't pursue you.
Men don't pursue you when you set in a boundary
for his disrespectful behavior.
By setting in a boundary,
your ladies are showing to a man, self-respect,
but you're not gonna allow him to mistreat you like that.
Nobody likes boundaries.
When you tell a kid of what the kid does,
the first thing he does, sulks or protests.
So, when you sit in a boundary with a guy,
the first type of behavior that you might get from him
is perhaps a negative attack on you.
Perhaps they pull away from you.
Perhaps, even trying to come across as you have hurt him.
And now, he's sulking.
These ladies, men who behaves this way
after you sit in a boundary,
I need you to give a guy space
to get over thinking about yourself
and come in to the place that he's thinking about you
and was it the right thing to do?
Usually, we need to sit in a boundary with people.
Then, we blindly put themselves first
or we do something that is unacceptable to you,
but it either benefits them or it strokes their ego.
When you sit in a boundary
and you say, no, this is not acceptable.
I'm not allowing that.
They're going to get angry
because they didn't get what they wanted.
So, ladies, these were my five reasons
why he's not pursuing you.
If you like this video, please press like.
Let me know in the comments below what did you think.
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So, thank you so much for watching.
Kisses from Dorset. (smooches)