your mind does what it thinks you want
to do this is probably one of the most
powerful rules of the mind here's your
mind's job it's got a very clear job i'm
your mind and i'm going to do what i
think you want and when you say oh this
commute is killing me my boss makes me
want to die
my kids are making me go up the wall i
am stressed out of my mind by the
freeway your mind goes
oh
you keep telling me that something is
killing you appears to be your job or
your commute why don't i just give you a
lovely ulcer and then you can stay home
and avoid that place that's killing you
it's that's its job
why don't you do your job and talk to
your mind better the commute is a pain
but i have great cds to listen to i have
stuff to do my boss is difficult with
everyone it's not me he's not there i'm
having sex with my wife he's not in the
room and having a lovely dinner this is
temporary he's an unhappy person
do it better you will get what you want
when you tell your mind what you want
but here come the words let's imagine
you're going to give a speech
and the words are oh my god i'm freaked
out i'm i'm terrified
i'm going to go bright right over my
mouth and go oh i i haven't got the time
right i i'm so nervous your mind goes do
not get on that stage if you walk to
that stage i'm going to give you a
massive panic in the middle of the room
because you told me you don't want to do
it and i've got to do what you want
or you can go i am fantastic at speaking
i've got something to say people like me
what i have to say is of value speaking
to a stage is like speaking to my wife
or husband and then your mind goes get
on that stage and do it you always have
a choice but your mind's job is to do
what it thinks you want when you go i
want a week off who's ever done this
what i would give for a week off lying
in bed your mind goes leave that with me
now you got the flu how cool am i
i listened to you you wanted a week off
lying around watching netflix now you
got it
that's not what you wanted you need to
say i need some time and i'm like a
battery i need to recharge and
i'm okay at working full out all week
because at weekends i recharge like a
battery now your mind understands but
saying i'd give anything not to have to
chair that meeting mine goes how about a
nice dose of diarrhoea i can bring that
up for you you don't want to chair that
meeting you said i'd do anything not to
go
i'd rather kill myself than give that
presentation to my boss and i go don't
kill yourself i just give you a really
upset stomach now you can't even leave
the bathroom there's no chance you're
meeting your boss done what you wanted i
know i'm making it funny but it is funny
that so many people don't understand
your mind's job
is to do what it thinks you want and it
bases that on one thing
the words you use
and the pictures you put in your head
and here's some great news you can
change those words and change those
pictures like that and when you do that
it changes everything
so your mind tries to move you towards
pain away from pain and towards pleasure
too
very i mean so many kids are going you
know i want to ask out this girl i want
to talk to that boy but i'm so nervous
they won't like me and they're going to
reject me and laugh at me and and if
they keep doing them the mind's going to
go no don't go there stay the way you
are so you have to say people like me
i'm a great kid
i get all my young kids to write on
their mirror i'm an awesome kid i'm
enough
and it really changes them because they
start to feel it i'm an awesome kid i
can talk to a girl like i can talk to my
friend
and then they feel okay but if you keep
linking patient your mind goes don't go
there don't go there and if you link
pleasure to it you go there because
you're giving your mind an easy job
i've got to work on my website all
weekend and all my friends are in the
bar so i can link paint that it's not
fair it's not fair that i've got to
spend all weekend writing when i could
be in the pub now your mind's gonna go i
think you should tidy up your sock
drawer make sure all your forks face the
right way then plump up the cushions and
then go to the pub because it's very
clear you do not want to work on your
website but oh boy getting those forks
and knives in line is really compelling
who's done that
most of us do that i suddenly need to do
the laundry which i don't even know i'm
tidying up my house because i'm saying i
don't want to write that bit of work how
about saying it thrills me to work on my
website i'm elated working on my website
there is nowhere i'd rather be in the
whole world right now than sitting in my
office working on my website your mind
goes i'm going to set you on fire now
you're going to be doing this till 2 in
the morning you told me you love it and
it thrills you let me fill you up with
energy and passion i'm a writer i know
how this works i never go oh my god i've
got to write a book that's so lonely
it's so isolating and what if no one
likes what if it goes on amazing they go
i hate that book and it gets no stars
or i can go i love writing
how cool is it i get to write people pay
for my books and they like them and they
give me great reviews
because there's a choice going on again
so whatever you want you must link
massive pleasure
to what you want and you can link pain
to what you don't want but i i don't
bother to do that let's think of all the
pain your book's never published you go
into your coffin it's still in a draw
you don't have to do that just focus on
the pleasure bit i'm a writer it's
amazing my book is published i used to
always imagine
my book in stores i'd imagine going to
an airport people were reading my book
and when i did it was like wow but your
mind went well i took you there because
you showed me very clearly what you
wanted i had that image to take you to
because what you want
wants you
and what you are moving towards is
moving towards you don't move towards
fear
don't move towards failure don't move
towards it going wrong move towards it
going right so we've actually done the
next bit your mind responds to the
pictures and words the fastest way to
change anything is to change the
pictures and words
and it's such an easy thing to do
i'm terrified i'm elated i'm useless i'm
amazing i have no memory my memory is
compelling i can't speak to people what
i have to say
is easy i find it easy to speak to
anyone
this is the most vexing rule of the mind
for every therapist and coach in the
room it's the one my clients have the
hardest time with
your mind loves what is familiar if your
mind could choose it would stay with
what's familiar and never go to what's
unfamiliar we're in a ward city
and that's interesting because years ago
at night they shut the door and we
stayed in the wall we didn't think do
you know i feel like going for a
midnight stroll i think i wonder i'm a
bit bored of being in this same old same
old i want some variety i think i'll
open the gate wander off and find
another tribe they might have killed you
or eaten you
we learnt familiar made us safe who here
notices with their kids and they
literally want the same cup
the same bowl the same cereal i took my
daughter to finland to see santa claus
she watched a little mermaid in finnish
the whole time and she didn't that was
okay and finished because she knew she'd
watched it 110 times where i'm like babe
his father christmas is only mummy i
want to watch the little mermaid it's
like well next time we'll just stay home
and watch a movie then she did actually
get into it but it made her feel good
she used to play this game she had so
many barbies and ken would come up in
his car and he was picked the same one
he never picked another one to go to the
ball because they like familiar it makes
them safe you know how many kids yeah
they want the same story every night
but familiar also makes us safe so
here's a rule of the mind and it's a
very important rule to put into practice
my mind likes what is familiar and it
doesn't like what's unfamiliar
you