In the early 1980s, kids were obsessed with the Cabbage Patch Kids, a line of plush dolls
with cherubic cheeks and outstretched arms that invited lots of affection. A few years
later, a parody of the Cabbage Patch line traded those cute faces and huggable bodies
for boogers, vomit, and characters with names like Luke Puke and Messy Tessie. They were
the Garbage Pail Kids, and for a few glorious years, they were the talk of the schoolyard.
They're actually celebrating their 35th anniversary in 2020 with new card sets, a reminder of
the inexorable march of time that is almost as gross as the cards themselves for how old
it makes me feel.
The Topps trading cards were a smash hit upon their release, but they also drew intense
criticism from concerned parents and even renowned ocean diver Jacques Cousteau. We’re
taking a closer look at the history of the Garbage Pail Kids on this installment of Throwback.
Welcome back to the series where we take a deep dive into some of the most fascinating
pop culture stories and events you might remember from your childhood. I’m your host, Erin
McCarthy. The Garbage Pail Kids worked their disgusting way into the hearts of America’s
children, leaking bodily fluids all the way. But before those cards made it to stores,
they needed to make it out of the Topps offices. Our story begins a bit inauspiciously: with
a cartoon baby in a dumpster.
The Topps Chewing Gum Company was founded in 1938 by Russian immigrant Morris Shorin
and his four sons—Joe, Ira, Abram, and Philip. For years, Topps—which was named because
Shorin wanted to top the competition—was content to peddle bubblegum. Then they began
including novelty cards in packages, including X-ray images in the late ‘40s that became
visible when viewed through red cellophane. Later, the company would have a lot of success
with sports cards, as well as sets inspired by popular movies and television shows like
1966’s Batman starring Adam West.
The Batman set provided an early indication that artists employed by Topps had an irreverent
sense of humor. Legend has it that the artist for the card set, Norm Saunders, noticed he
had an extra space on the proof sheet that laid out the cards before they were separated.
As a joke, he painted Batman in a private moment using a Bat-toilet. While it wasn’t
intended for public distribution, it spoke to a wry approach to what was otherwise the
somewhat serious business of producing sports cards.
Topps also had a modest hit in 1967 with Wacky Packages, a parody of common brand names.
Morton Salt, for example, became Moron Salt, and Ritz Crackers became Ratz Crackers. Not
exactly the rapier wit of a Dorothy Parker, but kids thought it was funny.
For a new set of Wacky Packages being developed in 1984, a Topps Creative Consultant named
Mark Newgarden came up with an idea parodying the Cabbage Patch Kids doll line called Garbage
Pail Kids. Newgarden had artist John Pound draw a package that featured what Pound called,
quote, “a little baby bum in a trash can.”
Not-so-coincidentally, Topps CEO Arthur Shorin, the grandson of Morris Shorin, was looking
to take a bite out of the Cabbage Patch Kids himself. Shorin had been negotiating with
the licensing agent for the Cabbage Patch dolls to do a line of trading cards but the
two parties could never agree on terms. By the way, our fact checker Austin informed
us that you’re supposed to call them babies. According to Cabbage Patch producer Xavier
Rhodes, if you call them dolls, “their feelings get hurt.” Cool!
Anyway: the rumor was that Original Appalachian Artworks, which owned the Cabbage Patch line,
thought trading cards were too lowbrow. They would soon find out just how lowbrow cards
could be.
In addition to Newgarden, Topps put New Product Development head Jay Lynch and Creative Director
Len Brown on the project, as well as employees Stan Hart and Art Spiegelman. It was moving
forward under the Garbage Pail Kids label. Spiegelman was working at Topps at the same
time he was preparing to publish the first volume of his landmark graphic novel Maus,
a harrowing depiction of his father’s experiences during the Holocaust. Maus later won a Pulitzer
Prize, making him the only Pulitzer winner I’m aware of to have collaborated on the
design of a character named Acne Amy.
The naming system was Spiegelman’s idea. He thought the cards would be more appealing
to kids if they carried common first names. That way, they could embrace their inner Stinky
Sam or give a friend a card with a less-than-flattering depiction of their namesake on it. For the
record, there was an Eerie Erin, released in 2013.
In what amounted to a marathon session of objectionable artwork, artist John Pound illustrated
all 44 cards in the first set in just two months. His sketches were then reviewed by
Spiegelman and other Topps employees, who typically marked up his drawings with editorial
input. In this case, their advice consisted of asking for more snot. Sometimes, they went
a little too far.
Believe it or not, Topps actually exercised some restraint in the card sets, holding back
a few cards they believed were too offensive to distribute.
One painting featured a baby in a pickle jar. That was quickly vetoed because some people
might have interpreted it as an abandoned fetus.
Another extremely distasteful image depicted Abraham Lincoln with bullet holes through
his top hat and a copy of Slaybill in his hand. The extremely grim gallows humor failed
to make the cut.
Topps also avoided any religious iconography, so a painting of a kid receiving Garbage Pail
Kids cards like he was Moses receiving the 10 Commandments was turned down.
Finally, Topps rejected a card that featured a little girl and her dog standing near a
pile of feces. The girl is pointing at the dog in an accusatory manner. The dog is pointing
right back at the girl. This one didn’t make it into stores, either, but the reason
had more to do with the fact it had two characters, a departure from the one-character style of
the series, than the implication that a girl was trying to frame her dog for the act of
defecating in the street.
While not all designs made the final cut, the artists and editors working on the cards
rarely gave up. Rejected cards were often presented to Arthur Shorin in future approval
sessions in the hopes he could be worn down. Many of these initially-rejected cards eventually
made their way into published sets. Even the pickled baby.
By the time Topps settled on a line-up, they decided to duplicate many of the paintings
and release them under different names. Slobby Robbie, for example, was also distributed
under the name Fat Matt so both the Robbies and Matts of the world could feel equally
insulted.
The first Garbage Pail Kids set was released in June 1985 and sold for just 25 cents per
pack. Kids were hooked immediately. With a sense of humor seemingly borrowed from Mad
magazine and an eye-catching display featuring the atomic detonation of Adam Bomb’s own
head, stores across the country couldn’t keep the cards in stock. Ciro Musso, who owned
the Southgate Card and Gift Shop in Massapequa Park, Long Island, told The New York Times
that the store had people waiting in line for their snot fix. Joan Fernbacher, owner
of an ice cream parlor in California named Candy Alley, told The Los Angeles Times that
they were getting 45 calls every day to see if the cards were available. Time and again,
parents and reporters were asking--what was the appeal?
Oddly enough, the Garbage Pail Kids had come along at a time that kids were big on disgusting
hobbies. The Inhumanoids line of toys featured an action figure called D. Compose, which
could open its rib cage to reveal entrails. Slime, the green glop that got into carpets
and never came out, was also big. Stinkor from He-Man carried a very unpleasant smell.
Whether the Garbage Pail Kids helped create this trend or just followed it, being gross
was becoming big business.
While Topps was pleased with the success, they knew the demand for more Garbage Pail
Kids couldn’t be fulfilled by John Pound alone. A number of artists were recruited
for the line, including Tom Bunk and James Warhola, who was Andy Warhol’s nephew. The
artists followed the template originated by Pound but were able to add their own flourishes.
Warhola actually rendered his cards as oil paintings, lending a surprising depth to characters
like Trash-Can Ken.
Topps was also hungry for jokes and names, inviting freelancers to come by their offices
in New York for what amounted to snot summits. For $50 a day, writers would conceive of card
ideas like Haley’s Vomit, an astronaut experiencing zero-gravity puke. Topps began issuing new
series as fast as they could pump them out, with some retailers reporting sales of up
to 500 packs a day.
There was just one problem. While children loved Garbage Pail Kids, adults didn’t find
them particularly funny. And neither did Original Appalachian Artworks, the company behind the
Cabbage Patch Kids, which felt the cards crossed the line from parody to copyright infringement.
The stage had been set for a baby vs. baby legal showdown.
In the spring of 1986, Original Appalachian filed a $30 million lawsuit against Topps,
alleging copyright infringement, trademark infringement, and unfair competition. Topps
executives got very nervous, particularly since there was a paper trail of comments
that demonstrated employees were very deliberately mimicking the oval-shaped heads and other
features of the Cabbage Patch dolls. Excuse me -- babies. It would be hard to say they
weren’t an inspiration when editorial notes said things like, quote, “Make them look
more like Cabbage Patch Kids.”
In August 1986, a federal judge ordered Topps to stop producing the cards until the copyright
issue could be sorted out. The judge, G. Ernest Tidwell, wrote that there was, quote, a “fine
line between parody and piracy.” Because Topps feared a massive judgment, they decided
to settle with the Cabbage Patch people in February 1987. Topps paid what amounted to
royalties for the cards as well as a lump sum payment. Topps also had to change the
design of their Garbage Pail Kids characters as well as the logo. That’s why cards in
later series were different in style than the earlier series, resembling hard plastic
dolls rather than the soft-sculpture appearance that was a trademark of the Cabbage Patch
Kids.
Settling with Original Appalachian was one thing. The court of public opinion was another.
For as long as the Garbage Pail Kids had been circulating, parents and other opinionated
adults thought the cards were in poor taste and inappropriate in school settings.
In late 1985 and early 1986, Chicago Tribune columnist Bob Greene printed two syndicated
columns describing how a student had been bullied by children who left a Garbage Pail
Kids card labeled “Most Unpopular Student” on his desk. Others feared characters like
Oozy Susie could be used to demean kids with the same first name. And still others described
a growing bloodlust among children who found the violence depicted in the cards gratifying.
Here’s how 7-year-old Tracy Wurthman explained the appeal of Dead Fred, a character dressed
like a gangster with a bullet in his head:
“I like this one. My dolly would look nice with its head blown off, too.”
This is how horror movies start.
Several schools banned Garbage Pail Kids cards from classrooms, taking particular exception
with the humorous licenses printed on the back of the cards that permitted kids to do
forbidden things like eat between meals. A group calling themselves Parents Against Sadistic
Toys, or PAST, successfully lobbied Toys ‘R Us locations in Oregon and Washington to stop
selling the cards in stores. One of the more dramatic critiques came from famed underwater
explorer Jacques Cousteau, who objected to their release in his native France and even
cautioned that kids who collected the cards might, quote, “go off the deep end and end
up on cocaine.”
The number of kids who wound up with a drug addiction as a result of collecting Garbage
Pail Kids cards is unknown but probably low. Still, Topps could never quite shake the idea
they were rotting kids’ minds, especially when they moved their trashy icons into television
and movies.
In 1987, Topps signed a deal with a small film studio named Atlantic Releasing for a
major motion picture based on the Garbage Pail Kids. Using state-of-the-art special
effects, Atlantic planned on an ambitious live-action family adventure film that would
charm children and adults alike. Instead, the result is one of the worst and possibly
most off-putting movies ever made.
In The Garbage Pail Kids Movie, an antiques dealer played by Anthony Newley is a caretaker
for a group of disgusting mutant children he has to keep hidden from civilized society.
The dealer employs a young man played by Mackenzie Astin, brother of Lord of the Rings and Goonies
star Sean Astin. The boy accidentally releases these abominations, leading to a series of
scenes in which characters outfitted in special effects make-up and mechanical expressions
project snot, vomit, and other secretions across the room. The actors playing the Garbage
Pail Kids were miserable, covered in latex while shooting in an extremely hot warehouse
in the San Fernando Valley and walking into walls because they couldn’t see out of their
masks.
The Garbage Pail Kids Movie made just $661,512 during its opening weekend in August 1987
and eventually topped out at $1.6 million. While it was cheap to make with a budget of
around $1 million, it was still a disappointment.
Topps had even worse luck with a Garbage Pail Kids animated series that was scheduled to
debut on CBS that same year. Even though it was a very toned-down version of the card
series, with very little of its signature gross-out humor, protests from watchdog groups
caused the network and advertisers to grow nervous. The network had ordered 13 episodes
but not one made it on the air before they pulled the plug.
The writing was on the bathroom wall. After selling roughly 800 million cards, the Garbage
Pail Kids fad was coming to an end.
By 1988, Topps had exhausted the possibilities for the Garbage Pail Kids. At least at that
point, the lawsuit from the Cabbage Patch Kids company seemed to have lessened enthusiasm
among artists, who preferred the original style. The movie had bombed. But perhaps more
than anything, the fad had just run its course—at least for the time being.
Topps released a total of 15 sets. By the time a 16th set was nearly completed, interest
was so low they opted not to release it. But after wallowing in the pop culture gutter
for 15 years, the Kids made a comeback in 2003 with an all-new series. Since then, artists
like John Pound, Tom Bunk, and James Warhola have been recognized for their contributions,
which usually went unsigned at the time. Garbage Pail Kids collectors regularly commission
artwork from them.
Topps is still printing cards, too. As part of the 35th anniversary of the cards in 2020,
Topps released parodies of Tiger King stars Joe Exotic and Carole Baskin. Joe was renamed
Joe Chaotic and Carole became Cool Cat Carole.
And earlier this year, Goosebumps author R.L. Stine announced he had signed a three-book
deal with Abrams Books to bring the trashy characters to the printed page. In Stine’s
version, the Kids are misfits who might have poor manners but still try to do the right
thing. The first volume, Welcome to Smellville, is due out on September 29.
So what made Garbage Pail Kids so sought after? Kids love to be grossed out, but that doesn’t
explain all of it. A lot of artists for the series believe the cards were to kids in the
1980s what underground comics and their counter-culture attitude were to kids of the 1960s. At the
height of Cabbage Patch Kids mania, this was a chance to rebel against shiny consumerism
and mass-market collectibles. It was a kid’s first taste of going against conventional
wisdom and questioning authority. It was evidence not everything in life had to be taken so
seriously. And that you could cover almost anything in snot.
As for that missing 16th set? In 1989, a sheet of unseen cards was located behind the Topps
building. It had been thrown into—where else—the garbage.
If you have an idea for a future episode of Throwback, leave it in the comments below.
I’m Eerie Erin McCarthy. Thanks for watching.